Family demands sibling sign over their half of a shared property, sibling agrees only if parents give them their house in return, parents refuse: 'They say I should just trust their word'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Sep 10, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

We hope that by now you all know never to trust someone's word, even if they are your family or closest friends. Words can be great; they are comforting, complementing, and affirming, but they are just words. If you want something to be done, if you want an agreement to be binding, you can't just take someone's word for it; there has to be more than that.

A written contract exists for a reason. It is permanent, it sticks around, often longer than actual people do. Take wills, for example; no one gets an inheritance based on what they were told verbally, if it wasn't written down, you might as well forget everything you were promised. That written will has more effect than any told word, even (and especially) after the person who wrote it is gone.

That is why the sibling in the story below refuses to keep going with the agreement they set with their family. Without proof that they will get what they were promised, they can't sign anything yet. Verbal promises are not worth much in the property business…

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    Cheezburger Image 10551400192
    via AndreyPopov

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITA for refusing to sign over my half of a property until I get legal security?

    I co-own a property with a sibling. They've spent years paying off debts so they could have full ownership.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    Now they want me to sign over my half immediately. The plan was that I would inherit another property from a parent in exchange,
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    but the parent hasn't legally transferred it or notarized a will guaranteeing it to me.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    My sibling says I'm holding things up, accusing me of being greedy and threatening that I'll ruin their bank deal.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    My parent says I don't deserve the property, that I should be grateful for anything I get, and implies I have no right to it.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I'm feeling manipulated and pressured from all sides.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I'm willing to give up my share, but only once there's a legal agreement ensuring I'll receive the promised property.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    Until then, I want my rights protected so I'm not left with nothing and my sibling can't build or sell on my portion without
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    compensating me.
    via Mundane_Ease613
  • 11
    I just want fairness and security, not more than anyone else. AITA for standing my ground in the face of emotional pressure and threats?
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    EDIT for clarity/context: Some people asked for more details because my original post was vague. Here's the full situation while still keeping some anonymity for me and my family:
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    The property was originally gifted to me and my sibling, but it came with a big debt attached. It couldn't even be used until that debt was cleared.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    Over the years, my sibling managed to reduce the debt and eventually paid off the rest themselves (around €5000). Their expectation has always been that once the debt was gone, they'd get full ownership.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I only found out recently that I still had legal say in the property. Up until then, I thought I'd already lost my rights because of a verbal deal made years ago.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    Back then, I was still a minor, and the "agreement" was: sibling gets the full property, and I get our parent's house after they pass.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I agreed on the condition that it was put into a will naming me as the sole inheritor. That will was never finalized, despite me asking for years.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    Young family looking at a house
    via kali9

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    I'm now in my 20s and studying abroad in another country, so I haven't been involved with this property at all. I don't even know the exact details, only what I was told.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    All I know is that I was promised one thing in return for giving up another, and now that promise is shaky.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    When I was told last week that I had to sign over my share, I agreed only if parent officially notarized their will naming me sole inheritor of their house.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    That suggestion was rejected, and instead, new conditions came up:
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I would inherit the house, but I'd be responsible for all funeral expenses (which I agreed to).
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I would not be allowed to turn away any family members who needed housing (which I do not agree to, because it means I'd carry all obligations but have no real control).
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    I proposed a contract as a compromise: sibling keeps moving forward with their half and can even start building, while I hold my half until I actually inherit the house.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    To make sure sibling is protected, I suggested adding that I can't sell my half or do anything with it until then.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    If I don't inherit the house, sibling would buy me out at fair market value. That way neither of us gets SC ed.
    via Mundane_Ease613
  • 28
    Sibling and parent see this as greedy and manipulative. They say I should just trust their word, wait possibly 30+ years, and sign away my only legal security right now so sibling can enjoy the property immediately.
    via Mundane_Ease613
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    That's why I'm struggling. I'm not asking for more than anyone else. I'm just asking for legal security before I give up mine.
    via Mundane_Ease613
  • 30
    Entire-Leg-5103 NTA. "Trust me bro" isn't a legal document. Get it in writing first.
    via Entire-Leg-5103
  • 31
    creative_usr_name NTA. A will in no guarantee of anything. They can write a new will the next day invalidating this one and cutting you out completely. You need to be on the
    via creative_usr_name
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    deed of the property itself now, or it needs to go in an irrevocable trust. Better yet you should speak with a lawyer to figure out the best way to structure this correctly.
    via creative_usr_name
  • 33
    TheRealBeelzebabs NTA. Consult a lawyer ASAP. From what you're saying I'd be thinking they actually need to buy out your half of the property because that is the only guarantee you'll get anything.
    via TheRealBeelzebabs

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family drama inheritance aita kids mother siblings homeowner buying a house reddit story parenting family sister property Reddit parents children Father
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