21-year-old backtracks on dogsitting for her boss after she informs her last-minute that her husband's old bandmate will be crashing with her overnight: 'The whole thing would have been really out of my comfort zone'

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Sep 12, 2025 2:00 PM EDT

Pet sitting is a pretty straightforward favor. All you have to do is feed the dog, take it for walks, and keep it company until its humans get home. If you're being paid to sleep over, you might even get snacks and a whole place to yourself, which is a sweet deal if you're used to living with roommates. I myself loved pet sitting in college for extra cash because it gave me some peace and quiet. But every now and then, what should be a simple arrangement takes a left turn. 

One young woman agreed to dog sit for her boss and even stay at her house for nearly two weeks. Everything was fine until the very first night; her boss texted her last minute, asking if her husband's old bandmate could also crash in the basement during her stay. She had never met this man, there was no separate entrance, and his only way in and out of the basement was through the same hallway as her bedroom.

Understandably, she felt uneasy about the whole thing. She told her boss she wasn't comfortable having a stranger sleep in the house while she was there, and her boss said it was fine; the man would find somewhere else to stay. But the cold texts that followed had our narrator wondering if she overstepped by setting this boundary, and worse, whether or not her job was now on the line. 

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  • 01

    AITA dog sitting for my boss and saying no to her husband's friends crashing at the house?

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  • 02
    Basically my boss asked if I could dogsit for her and her husband while they're away on vacation. I'm 21F, and my boss is probably
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  • 03
    in her 50's as is her husband. I stayed at their house while I watched him for almost two weeks. I didn't have any problem with the arrangements until the
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  • 04
    first night that they're gone I get a text from her asking if I minded if a man that her husband used to be in a band with crashed in the basement while I was there.
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  • 05
    She said that I'll barely see him and he's stayed there before when he needed a place to crash.
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  • 06
    But she showed me the downstairs and it's not like there's a bathroom down there, or even a bed, not that it matters I guess maybe there's a blow up mattress
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  • 07
    or something. But the only door the basement is inside the house just around the corner of the bedroom I'm staying in (no locks
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  • 08
    inside either). I just felt uneasy about it and was trying to figure out what to say, and she told me unless if makes me uncomfortable.
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  • 09
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  • 10
    I tried to be honest and say it's nothing against this guy, but having never met him I didn't think I'd be comfortable
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  • 11
    essentially have a man I didn't know in the house but if it's too hard for him to find other accommodations I guess we can work it out?
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  • 12
    So she told me it's fine and he'll figure something else out but her texts were really short and I get the feeling she's ped at me. I kind of feel like I'm the a hle because this guy is obviously
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  • 13
    someone she knows and I probably offended her/made things difficult for him. But the whole thing would have been really out of my comfort zone too
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  • 14
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  • 15
    LdiJ46 In my opinion she was totally in the wrong to even ask. It just wasn't appropriate.
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  • Why can this dude not take care of the dog if he's going to be crashing at the home? Maybe he won't be there the whole two weeks, but he can at least take over duties while he's there, no?

  • 16
    Mystery-Ess Boss assumed the power Dynamic would coerce approval. Glad OP stood her ground!
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  • 17
    Avlonnic2 INFO: If her husband's friend is coming to stay, surely he can dogsit?
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  • 18
    You photograph the place and the dog to prove condition you are leaving both in. Then, you meet the stranger outside the house to hand over the key and responsibility.
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  • 19
    Then you never agree to this arrangement with a work boss/ colleague again. Bad business, as you are discovering with your boss's attitude.
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  • 20
    KZimmy ⚫ . You put the key under the mat and don't meet the stranger at an empty house
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  • This is such a stressful situation to put an employee through and totally unacceptable behavior!

  • 21
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  • 22
    SunsetSeaTurtle NTA but your boss is. Putting a 20 something YO female in the home alone with a 50 something YO male isn't appropriate or safe. If
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  • 23
    the man is wanting to stay over, maybe he should watch the dog and relieve you of your duties. Boss crossed a major boundary IMO.
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  • 24
    Pastel Gyoza It's literally so insane never agree to house sit for them again.
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  • 25
    SunsetSeaTurtle I'd personally be a little worried to work (like the regular job, not the house/pet sitting) for someone with such blatant disregard for boundaries, but in this job market... It might not be possible to find quick re- employment, so won't suggest it.
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  • 26
    EfficientSociety73 NTA. If her husbands friend is crashing at their place, he can dog sit. There is zero reason for you to be uncomfortable in a home with a man you don't know
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  • 27
    who is twice your age. I'm not saying he would do anything, but you don't know. Being a woman, we have to be hyper sensitive to the world around us and strange
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  • 28
    men are a threat until we know otherwise. Tell your boss that plans have changed because you're uncomfortable and she obviously doesn't understand that.
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Tags

boss dogs work stories woman pets Female Empowerment adulting bosses work coworkers pet workplace Horrible Bosses adulthood women
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