Husband and his family try to guilt his pregnant wife into bringing their 4-year-old daughter to soccer practice every Saturday morning, despite the wife's busy schedule and chronic illness: ‘I’m at my personal capacity’

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  • "My in laws have made it clear they agree that it would be good for her and I'm being unfair."
  • "AITA for not wanting my 4 year old daughter to join a soccer team simply because I don’t want to get up early every Saturday?"

    My husband has said he thinks I'm being selfish and I am. But I am being strategic here. I'm a mom of two 4 and under.
  • Currently 5months pregnant. Im a kindergarten teacher and I have narcolepsy....so needless to say I'm tired all the time. Saturday is the one day in my week where there are no set plans and I like it that way.
    via SingerDue4540
  • Why do I need to ruin the one day I get to choose what I want to do, just so my 4 year old who probably won't know
    via SingerDue4540
  • what she is missing can go play a sport she probably isn't ready to play anyway. She has years to pick up a hobby/extracurricular.
    via SingerDue4540
  • I just don't see the point right now other than to stress me out even more than I already am. Point blank I'm just tired and don't want to so I can't even say
    via SingerDue4540
  • it's not selfish but we are aloud to be selfish on some things and I feel justified because I'm at my personal capacity.
    via SingerDue4540
  • side view of a tired pregnant woman putting her hand to her head out of stress
  • My husband won't even be able to help with every game because he sometimes works weekend so no I'm not interested in putting my kids in sports right now because I will likely flake on those days he works.
    via SingerDue4540
  • Also we live in a very hot state | have zero interest in spending more time outside than I have to.
    via SingerDue4540
  • My husband's reasoning is he wants her to be athletic and mostly that she will make friends and have fun socializing.
    via SingerDue4540
  • I'd rather help her socialize through play dates not a weekly commitment to be on a team. My in laws have made it clear they agree that it would be good for her and I'm being unfair.
    via SingerDue4540
  • My family thinks it's not that important right now at 4 but say she would have fun. So what do you think? AITA?
    via SingerDue4540
  • swiftiebookworm22 If the in-laws think soccer is so important, they can volunteer to drive her to and from her games + practices. Problem solved! NTA
  • bandgeek_babe This. Exactly this. The people who are emotionally attached to her participating are the ones who need to be responsible for it. She's 4. She's not the one who cares, lol There are plenty of ways for her to be active and socialize. It's not exclusive to soccer on Saturdays.
  • There will be plenty of opportunities for sports in the future that don't involve you sacrificing your mental health and well being. Time for you is important too.
    via bandgeek_babe
  • cmonnomorework Yeah also whats with the husband wanting his kid to be athletic... at 4?? When the kid hasn't shown any interest in soccer? They just run clumsily around like a crowd of dizzy lemmings at that age. I get that its helpful, can assist with social development, but that can come in spades years later. If you think so strongly about it, YOU do it not your overworked exhausted wife.
  • Mother-Initial-7154 NTA. If you are going to get her involved la sport...the one you should get her involved in is swimming. It's one only sport that can potentially save her life.
  • SingerDue4540 This is such a great point and she actually wants to learn swimming. Heck I love it too. I would do it with her.
  • DreamStater NTA. You work full time. You have a 4 year old. You are pregnant. You have a serious health condition. You have an unhelpful but opinionated spouse and in-laws. When do you get to be a human being of equal worth with these people?
  • NOW is when. No one is looking out for you here so you need to look out for yourself. NOW. Prioritize your health, get the rest you need, set boundaries and hold them. Get some help. If you start treating yourself with love and respect, you might get some from everyone else, but no matter what, you will feel better. And as someone who has spend an enormous amount of time on youth sports, do not start them earlier than need be. 4 is too young.
    via DreamStater

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