16-year-old abruptly kicked out by father with just $20 and no support for "talking back", spends days homeless before friend shelters him, he is eventually fetched by his father, but struggles with forgiveness years later: 'I've never healed from this'

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    Teenage boy sleeping on an outdoor bench
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    My parents kicked me out when I was 16 years old. After 4 days and 3 nights my dad found me and took me back home. AITAH for not really caring about them as they get older?

    Hi everyone Im having a hard time wrestling with this. When I was a kid I was a handful always arguing and talking back to them, nothing major.
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    My parents kicked me out of the house when I was 16. (Im not sure why now after all these years, maybe to teach me a lesson or as a punishment?) My dad gave me a $20 bill and drove me to the nearest public transportation hub, and then kicked me out of the car and said see ya.
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    I was scared and ended up living on the streets for 1 night and 2 days before my childhood friend let me stay at his house for another 2 nights and 2 days until my dad knocked at the door and found me.
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    He said my mom made him come get me and lets go back home. This all happened in the mid 90's and no cellphones or security cameras anywhere.
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    My parents are aging and Ive always wanted a connection with them but its never happened.
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    They have given me good advice and suggestions over the years, though. Ive never healed from this and feel they abandoned me when I needed them the most.
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    AITAH for not really caring about them as they get older?
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    A train station
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    Lucky_Creme_3977 I'd lean towards NTA. That was pretty messed up of them, your dad in particular. It's gonna be awkward after all this time but you could talk to them about it. See if they both felt bad or regret it now. If they don't feel bad then neither should you.
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    The vindictive petty part of me wants to say drive them to an old folks home and give them $20 and a crisp thumbs up.
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    No_oNerdy NTA. Respect your self, and maintain boundaries. No one should do that to their child.
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    waner21 I'm going with NTA. I sort of feel for you. People may not understand how old wounds can affect you and how we may have developed coping mechanisms over time, and sometimes, those coping mechanisms are emotionally removing ourselves from others.
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    CDA_CPA My mother kicked me out at 13 because I wanted to spend more time with my father. Fortunately I had time to call him before she removed me from the house, and he took me home with him across town. I never went back. Parents can be AHs. You are definitely NTA.
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    PrydferthAnnwyl NTA, my dad kicked me out at 14 after an argument. Luckily my step sister let me live with her for 6-7 months. I had to move back in with him afterwards. Our relationship has never been the same and he can't understand why there's a barrier between us. He then also kicked me out at 18.
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    They could've found other ways to handle you, waited multiple days to find you, and assumed everything would be fine because they're the parents.
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    Teenage boy looking through the train window
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    ohsotypicallyanne ΝΤΑ The people in this thread trying to justify your dad's behavior by questioning what you, a 16 year old child, did to deserve this are disturbing.
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    TALKTOME0701 • 1d ago NTA. Sometimes things break the connection and we can't get it back. Sounds like you guys are civil, but the bond you had was never repaired. They are not your responsibility
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    Clevernickname1001 Parents don't seem to realize that children's treatment of them as they age typically reflects how the child felt treated when they were young. NTA
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    Ymisoqt420 I was kicked out at 16 and then my dad got a new family. To this day he posts pictures of his stepdaughter and not me. I went no contact at the beginning of the year.
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    Aminar14 The part that drives me nuts here is "I was a handful for talking back/arguing" THAT IS NORMAL!
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    More than that. It's healthy. Children need to have voice and agency. They need to communicate their needs and be given the space to do so. They should not be mindless obedience machines.
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    So yeah, NTA, they were authoritarian picks who are getting what they deserved for guilting a child's normal developmentally appropriate behavior.

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