Teen daughter refuses to let mother confiscate her phone, after ignoring repeated requests to stop blasting YouTube at 2 a.m., so her mother uses parental controls to lock the phone, daughter claims she has no right: 'I bought it with my Xmas money'

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  • 01
    "It got to the point I could hear her phone blasting Youtube at 2am despite asking her to quieten down"
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    Aita for taking my daughters phone

    Last night my daughter (15f) was inconsiderate, despite me asking calmly a few times for her to be considerate of people sleeping and to keep noise.
  • 03
    levels down, she was slamming doors. Putting lights on etc. It got to the point i could hear her phone blasting youtube at 2am despite asking her to quieten down.
  • 04
    I have parental locks so i lockd the phone and took it from her when she refused to turn it down. She immediately screamed and screamed at me saying I have no right
  • 05
    to take her phone. That because she bought it with her own Xmas money (true but I pay the bill) I cant touch it without her consent and she doesn't consent.
  • 06
    Then she started to take my things and asked me how I like it when i wouldn't return it and told her to go to bed. She says im a complete AH but im actually just exhausted by her. Aita?
  • 07
    ****** Edit: im grateful for all of your replies and perspectives. Ill add some more context because people have asked questions.
  • 08
    I have thought about my parenting and im going to tighten things up. When shes at school im going to limit her devices, not block them completely but limit the content.
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    Cheezburger Image 10571186688
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    She wanted to stay up late because its the last non school night of half term where we are. She does have a boyfriend who i am concerned about, he isnt a good influence on her but again when I mention it im told to stop nagging.
  • 11
    I did speak to her this morning and she said she feels I am nagging her and just wont get off her back about exams and post16 options.
  • 12
    Her phone is on a rolling contract. Once she finishes her exams I am going to cancel the contract and it can be her first "bill" she takes on. She does have ear buds but chooses not to wear them because she "shouldn't have to"
  • 13
    Beneficial_Test_5917 NTA. However common a phone is today, children do not have a right to have one, it is an earned privilege.
  • 14
    OP East-Grab-616 That's what I said to her but because she paid for the device herself she feels entitled to it all the time.
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    OkGazelle5400 NTA but it sounds like there isn't a lot of other parenting. Why is she up at 2am?
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    Cheezburger Image 10571187200
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    OP East-Grab-616 Where we are its the last weekend of half term break so she wanted to have one last late night before getting back into the school routine.
  • 18
    CookiesAndCachel You're not the AH at all, boundaries and respect go both ways, and she'll understand that better with time.
  • 19
    OP East-Grab-616 I really hope so thank you for your reply.
  • 20
    urfavlatinalolo NTA. You're the parent. Setting boundaries and enforcing reasonable consequences (like taking a phone being used disruptively at 2 AM) is your job, not an invasion of her rights. Her purchasing the device doesn't override household rules or your responsibility to ensure she gets rest and respects others.
  • 21
    cantthinkofausermb as a 15f - NTA!!!
  • 22
    Due Jellyfish8941 Nta, but it deffo seems like the phone isn't really the issue.
  • 23
    live-fast-eat-trash NTA but who is actually running the house if she's acting like that?
  • 24
    escapefromelba I mean between family sharing and your router it's pretty easy to restrict them without physically taking the phone away. Just set her downtime to a reasonable hour.

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