Woman shares how her cat and dogs are happier once she kicked out her ex-boyfriend from the flat: 'I will never not listen to my animals again.'

Author image for Ayala Sorotsky
Ayala Sorotsky • Writer and Editor
Jan 23, 2026 3:00 PM EST

Pets can sense people in a way other people can't.

A calm dog growling at a person who approaches them in a threatening manner, a relaxed cat suddenly hisses at a person they've just met, a bunny refusing to leave the room when someone in particular visits the house. Our pets can assess people's character often better than we do, and much faster - they have their superior sense of smell, which basically lets them sense bad intentions under a seemingly innocent facade. And when you have a connection with your pet, a deep one, of love and trust - you should probably trust your pet as you would trust your gut.

This trust is super important when it comes to letting close people into a pawrent's life. Especially when it's a significant other who is moving in. It's a whole new person in the pet's life - no longer a guest, but a proper character in their lives, another one of their hoomans. And if you come with pets, a partner should respect the package deal, that they were there before them. Your partner should never let you think it's them or your pets - that's not part of being a true partner.

And when your pets display such a changed behavior around a person, in particular a close one, it's never a good sign. Remember - your loving pet always has your best interst in heart. They don't have the capacity for malice. And no one should act towards them with malice, whatsoever.

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  • 01
    My toxic relationship was affecting my cats health
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10598798080
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 03
    I kicked my ex out of my house on Dec 2nd 2025. When they lived here there was constant arguments following with screaming. I never noticed how much it was affecting all the animals in the house. I have 2 dogs and 1 cat.
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 04
    When my ex lived with me: Dogs were resources guarding any and all food by chasing the cat if he got too close. My cat was too scared to go anywhere near the dogs. My cat wasn't eating much.
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 05
    After I kicked my ex out: • My dogs energy have calmed a lot. • My dogs no longer resource guard or chase the cat.
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 06
    • My cat is now spending more time in the common areas of the house. My cat is eating more and has put on some healthy weight. His coat is looking much longer and healthier.
    via SignificanceNeat1618

  • Listing these things one after the other makes the difference very clear to anyone who has a hard time imagining the behavioral difference in pets when it comes to household dynamics. It's known, for example, that how parents behave affects their kids later on in life - the house they grow up in shapes a lot of their early perspective on life. But seeing very clearly how these things affect our pets as well only strengthens the validity of the psychological phenomenon.

    It's like this famous saying about Pit Bulls - they might've been bred to be fighting dogs, but they were bred so in a way that solidified their owner-pleasing characteristics. Meaning that it's not their muscles, jaws, or bite power that made them fierce fighting dogs - it was their endless desire to please their humans (who, back then, wanted and encouraged them to fight). Now, Pit Bulls are one of the sweetest dog breeds around - and that's because this is how their humans treat them, and what behaviors they encourage. And Pit Bulls are eager to please their owners, so this is why the behavior of an entire dog breed changed.

    And this is true for pets in general, and especially in the situation described here - how we act around our pets affects them deeply.

  • 07
    A couple is arguing, in the middle of a fight. The boyfriend shouts at the girlfriend, raising his hand towards her, angry expression. The girlfriend is turned away from him, dfeated look towards the ground, hand on her head.
    via Timur Weber from Pexels

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 08
    Im making this post to bring awareness to how toxic relationships affect everyone in the household, including the animals.
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 09
    chiplay99 i had two cats when i was living with my ex. (now three) Pickles is my really skittish girl. when i was living with him she would always hunker lower to the ground when he walked around, would always take off running if you started mopping/sweeping. wasabi (my bigger guy) once got in between my ex and i during an argument and almost attacked him.
    via chiplay99
  • 10
    anyway, since i've moved out and im in a better relationship my girl is no longer as skittish. i used to not be able to put my hand over her head and pet her that way, now i can rub my hand all over her face. she used to freak out if you carried something above her, now she just watches you.
    via chiplay99
  • 11
    i honestly beat myself up over it a lot, knowing i was the reason my cats were struggling for a while. we are all healthy and happier now.
    via chiplay99
  • 12
    rough night babe? and this is how Pickles sleeps now
    via chiplay99
  • 13
    SignificanceNeat1618 OP Awh pickles is so cute! I'm glad you are also in a better situation
    via SignificanceNeat1618
  • 14
    pereira2088 I think most people will just take their behavior as normal and not a reaction to the stress we put them through.
    via pereira2088
  • 15
    NecroKitten I'm still in the ebb/flow process of a horrid breakup that happened a bit ago and honestly? Hell yeah to this. My two fluffs have been with me through so much and they haven't broken my heart or caused drama
    via NecroKitten
  • 16
    Fight_Fascists893 Had the same thing with my ex. She would scream, throw shit, etc. My Lydia was TERRIFIED of women. She would desperately try to get me away from any that came over.
    via Fight_Fascists893
  • 17
    I moved in briefly back in with my mom once we broke up, and once she found women were safe thanks to my mom, she adored everyone again. It made me realize just how abusive my ex was. When you're a man... you even discount your own experiences because you know no one is coming to save you. But seeing how my baby reacted really opened my eyes.
    via Fight_Fascists893
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    Cheezburger Image 10598799872
    via Fight_Fascists893
  • 19
    Gullible Safety2771 Up voting for the 10%.. my Allan was terrified my my ex wife would look inside a room and walk backwards to leave. Didn't realise how bad it was till I left. He then applied his learnt behaviour to all women including my mum and daughter. All the other commentary is spot on
    via Gullible_Safety2771
  • 20
    BigWoodsCatNappin The first night my soon to be abusive bf stayed overnight, my best boy pushed out a second floor screen and jumped out of the house into the rain. His brother (a feral in recovery but would follow his brother from another mother into hells fire and back) jumped out behind him. They stayed out all night in the damn rain and cold next to a busy street rather than sleep with us/him. I freaked out when I realized they where gone, called into work, roamed the neighborhood til I foun
    via BigWoodsCatNappin
  • 21
    catlady90 My cat became underweight when I was married to my abusive ex husband for a year. She would cower and would swat at him if he got close to her. She never sat on the couch because he would always be there.
    via catlady90
  • 22
    A year later after getting out of the marriage, both my cat and I gained some weight. She sleeps on the couch and has constant zoomies.
    via catlady90
  • 23
    TheAlienCreature I made the same observation a few years ago when I finally had the guts to kick out my abusive ex... one of my cats had a peeing problem that stopped as soon as he left the household... later I even realized that she mostly peed on places where he would have been... I think she was just trying to tell me something all those years lol
    via TheAlienCreature
  • 24
    EDIT: I totally forgot; You totally did the right thing for your and your pet's health and I'm really proud of you! I wish you the very best!
    via TheAlienCreature
  • 25
    FewerStarsLost Reminds me of my one ex... I wasn't with him for very long thankfully, but he hated everything about my cat... brought in some random stray dog as well that would piss n shit on the floor and would never take it outside because it would obviously run away... my cat had so much anxiety even before the dog that she licked her stomach bald...
    via FewerStarsLost
  • 26
    It was a mess... my cat is thankfully happy and healthy now, but if she ever gets stressed I know I need to move immediately.
    via FewerStarsLost
  • 27
    mosschiefmayhap I knew my guy was a good one when my shy girl hopped right on him and wanted him to pet her. She literally doesn't let anyone but me see her much less touch her
    via mosschiefmayhap
  • 28
    queen206 I'm so glad yall are in a better situation now! My cat used to pee on the couch where my abusive ex would sit. He definitely knew that I was stressed and wanted out and I feel bad that it stressed him out too. No peeing problem after I moved out and dumped the couch.
    via queen206
  • 29
    singularopossum After my ex moved out, my cat's asthma went away completely and he doesn't need his inhaler anymore. Neither of us smoked. We did a lot to make sure the air was as clean as it could be and he had an inhaler.
    via singularopossum

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boyfriend cat dogs drama pets ex boyfriend relationships Cats toxic relationship animals
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