Mom Threatens to Stop Being Friends With 18-Year-Old Daughter if She Wears a Dress She Doesn't Like to Her High School Graduation

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jun 13, 2026 12:30 PM EDT

Should a mom and daughter be 'friends' in the first place?

If you've ever met a mom who is "best friends" with her daughter, you might've seen some red flags. They probably don't have the boundaries a mom and daughter should. The mom might confide in her daughter about her relationship with her father, and the daughter will inevitably feel pressured to emotionally support her mother, even though she shouldn't know these personal details about her parents' relationship in the first place. Oftentimes, immature or young parents want their children to be their best friends, and while that dynamic can develop healthily when the kid is an adult, it's much more difficult to maintain when the kid is a teenager, and they should be seeking counsel with their parents instead of the other way around. 

The mother in this story is extremely emotionally immature, which explains why she's willing to cut off her "friendship" with her daughter over something as inconsequential as the dress she wears to her high school graduation. Heck, her graduation gown is going to be covering the dress the entire time! Why would her mother care this much about what she's wearing under the gown?

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  • a young graduate who wants to wear the dress she wants to wear to graduation without her mother threatening to sever their relationship over it.
    via Andrew Rivera

    A model representing a young graduate who wants to wear the dress she wants to wear to graduation without her mother threatening to sever their relationship over it. 

  • Am I the bad guy for buying the outfit I want to wear for graduation at the cost of my ‘friendship’ with my mom?

    Hi! my graduation is coming up soon in three days, and the conversation about what I'm going to wear came up a few times with my mom. I'm 18 living with
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  • my parents and also live in an ethnic household, so I'm legally independent on paper, but not really in the eyes of my family.
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  • I want to preface by saying that, I personally, don't have a deep attachment to graduating and having the traditional big grad party. I'm proud of my achievements, but
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  • have never been the type of person interested in big gestures and celebrations. Enter my mom. My mom (a person who had graduated at some point
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  • in her life) has tried multiple times to persuade me into hosting a party when I communicated several times to her that I don't want one, and every time.
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  • I said no, she would go on about how I'm "robbing her from the most important moment of her life as my mother". After a couple more attempts, I was able to
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  • have her call it off, and I thought maybe finally we're on the same page Come today. My mom was trying to get me to go to the mall today to shop for a grad outfit and
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  • I said yes. I found something I really liked, but the moment I showed it to her she expressed her dislike and told me pick something else out because the color I chose
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  • Cheezburger Image 10638579712
    via Rafael Jimenez

    A representation of a young woman shopping for dresses for her high school graduation. Little does she know that her mom won't like the dress she chooses. 

  • wasn't "appropriate for the event". Having dealt with many times my mom has shutdown my opinions and choices because it doesn't align with hers, I kind of
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  • snapped and told her she cares more about the d in graduation more than she does me, and she can either choose to support me and let me decide what I want to
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  • wear at MY graduation, or not come at all. The argument ended with her saying how "our 'friendship' is over" (which is how the she views our relationship conditionally)
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  • and how 'true' friends don't disrespect each other by refusing to accept each others' criticisms. I discussed the matter with my family and they
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  • told I was overreacting and making such a big deal out of nothing (which I kind of understand) The reason that I'm conflicted though is
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  • majorly because of my mother's upbringing. She was raised in a very strict household and wasn't allowed to go out at my age. She had a strained relationship with my
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  • authoritative grandfather which is why she gets very defensive now about any sort of criticism, and has a victim mentality. So, knowing that, yes, I'm in a much more
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  • comfortable living situation at this point of my life compared to my mom, should I let her have a say in my milestones and let her (kind of) live the life she
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  • would've liked and, definitely deserved, through me, or should stand by my decision and reinforce my boundaries with her?
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  • TOLERABLE
    via Leslie Tzoy

    A model pretending to be the mother, who is willing to risk her relationship with her daughter over something as petty as a dress. 

  • If you have a mother like this, how do you deal with it? Do you try to limit contact with her as much as possible? Do you let her get her way on the small stuff because you know that it's not a fight worth having? What should this girl do?

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friendship graduation mother dress daughter shopping high school
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