Bride-to-be specifically asks her wedding guests to wear any colour but white and green for the ceremony and mother-in-law buys two white and green dresses: '“It’s like champagne” she said as she looked it up, and I just knewwww!!'

Author image for Olivia Arocena
Olivia Arocena • Writer and Editor
Jul 5, 2026 7:15 PM EDT

Not sure who the bride is at this wedding

I have no idea why this is so common; I've heard and watched so many related stories. Mothers-in-law are, not for nothing, represented in so many folk tales like this. They act very jealous with their sons; they sabotage relationships; they always present themselves as 'the one who knows best', and every time a husband is on their side, you are sure to lose. The real bride from this story, fortunately, has a partner who is on her side, but the mother-in-law thing is nonetheless a struggle. Would you give up your dream of being the only one who wears white at your wedding? Or how would you manage this situation? Is there any way to get a mother-in-law like this to do what you need?

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  • 01
    a bride and a woman with a gren dress standing next to each other
    via Colton Sturgeon

    The bride and the insistent mother-in-law

    The picture is representative

  • 02

    My Mother in Law’s 2 White Dresses

    Wedding planning is hardddd and I'm about to body slam my MIL soon lol.
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 03
    My fiancé and I specifically asked on our invitations for people not to wear white or green, as he is wearing a green suit and wants to stand out too (fair and cute!) and I've
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 04
    had a fear of his (what we are peer reviewing as) narcissist mother trying to wear white since before we got engaged.
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 05
    Fast forward to about 2 months ago my MIL is showing us dresses she wants to wear on her phone and asks my fiancé if she can wear green to match him. I let him decide if he was comfortable with
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    that even though it's kinda weird that she asked despite us being very clear about that. He begrudgingly agreed. Then he got up to go to the bathroom and she
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 07
    decided she had another dress to show me. "It's like champagne" she said as she looked it up, and I just knewwww!! And sure enough she turned the phone around and it was white. She literally said "it's
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 08
    white wedding dresses hanging on dress rack
    via Filipp Romanovski

    "It's like champagne"

    Objects in the picture are representative

  • 09
    like an off white" like GIRL my dress is off white thank you very much! I told her "the green dress you showed us was so lovely" and ended that conversation cause that's what you have to do with
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    people like that. I think she wanted me to react but alas, I don't give energy to that (at least public facing lol.) I had to break it to my fiancé because he
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    promised his mother wasn't that bad to do something like that, and I felt hurt by it. Thankfully he believed me despite me having no proof cause she waited for him to leave the conversation, and has
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    been very supportive and protective since. 2 weeks later she texted saying she got a dress, and refused to send a pic for a week when I asked before sending a pic of the
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    green one when my fiancé re-asked for me. I was relieved and moved on. However last week we were at his parent's for dinner and she wanted to show me "her new dresses
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    she got for the wedding because she wasn't sure of the green one after all." Thankfully my fiancé heard this and followed us upstairs, where he caught her pulling out another white dress that she had
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    actually bought this time! We both just kind of froze and then left pretty quickly, but not before she said "I'm the mother of the groom and just want to wear something special to his wedding - I mean your
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    guys' wedding" Imao. The next day she texted me to ask what my mom was wearing and when I told her she said "I hope the dress I showed you yesterday isn't too casual."
    via Lopsided-Ear8914

  • Weddings are psychologically loaded events; we all know that. It’s a ritual that can signify the loss of a ‘leading role’ in their son's life to some mothers. Maybe it's because they invested so much of their lives constructing their identities around being mothers, so when an event like this shows up, for them it's like stepping into a life where they are not the leading feminine role, and that can spark some competition. Of course, this isn’t a healthy way of going about it, but it happens, and it happens pretty often.

  • 17
    I just liked the message, and two days later my fiancé texted her saying her idea to match was great and that he wants her to wear the green dress so they can look like a family in the photos
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    Imao. Gotta stroke the ego to remind her that we already made an exception for her. I swearrrr though that she's going to go out again and find a white dress with
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    some green on it and tbh I'm just going to ask the photographer to not take pics of her except for one because that's hilarious to wear the two colours we specifically asked people not to wear. Our
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    photographer is cool enough and I don't really want an annual reminder of it (because she's one of those fb boomer moms that sends and resends memories every year) and to see a pic of my husband
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
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    with his mom in a white dress lol. I'm also tempted to buy one of the white dresses
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 22
    she got and do a fit change halfway through the reception but idk if I'm petty enough for that.
    via Lopsided-Ear8914
  • 23
    older woman grabbing man's arm
    via Glenn Guiao

    The mother-in-law refusing to let go of her son

    People in the picture are models

  • Some mothers and fathers cannot tolerate their sons building a lifestyle that doesn’t revolve around their family of origin, so maybe they unconsciously (I don’t think they do it on purpose) generate drama and display behaviours that restore attention to themselves. To me, weddings are all about change, and this mother-in-law is clearly resisting change; with the right attitude, if the groom sides with the bride, they can manage to set correct boundaries and ‘help’ the mother-in-law to understand that her role in her son’s life has changed. About the dress, I think the only way to solve this is for the son to talk to her or try to influence her to make the right decision. What would you guys do?

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