‘If this is your attitude, you will lose a son. But if you change your attitude you won't just keep your son but you will gain a daughter’: MIL causes chaos at wedding ceremony by doing everything she was asked not to

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Olivia Arocena • Writer and Editor
Aug 20, 2026 2:30 PM EDT

What happens when your mother-in-law is doing everything she can to sabotage your wedding?

The ideal reaction to behavior like this would be not to let it affect you, but that's very difficult when you are celebrating such an important event that fundamentally changes the nature of your relationship with your spouse and your outlook on the future.

This Redditor, who recently became a wife, shared her story, which, sadly, is all too common among wedding and relationship anecdotes. Some mothers-in-law think they have a say in how and when their sons should get married. The thing is, their precious sons are already full-grown adults, and they should decide that for themselves.

Sadly, not every family has this knowledge, and mothers-in-law still act as if their sons depend on them for their every move. It goes without saying that this is completely unacceptable behavior, and while the mother-in-law is allowed to disagree with her son's decisions in love and marriage, she should be the bigger person and not let that disagreement determine her attitude on the day of the ceremony her son chose to put together.

In my opinion, the fact that she encounters no boundaries when she displays this sort of attitude is an advantage for her, and she will continue to cross them every time she can if nobody puts an end to it, because she is consciously or subconsciously trying to sabotage her son's relationship. Of course, I believe the one who should be setting the boundaries is the son.

Some mothers need to understand that their sons have already grown up, and if they can't comprehend that on their own, they should definitely receive some help to achieve that realization.

How would you approach a MIL if she showed up like this the day of your wedding, would you simply ignore her?

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  • She's always there

    Cheezburger Image 10657494016
    via Kari Bjorn Photography

    The wedding party with the MIL

    Models for explanatory purposes only

  • MIL nightmare at our wedding

    My husband and I were best friends for over a year when we suddenly realised we couldn't face a day without each other and we immediately got engaged. It shocked a lot of people but it is what felt right for us at the time.
    via No-Nothing5039
  • I'm very understated and practical in the way I dress and so I wanted a ring to represent that. My MIL is the complete opposite. When my husband got the ring my MIL demanded to see it and when he showed it to her she was
    via No-Nothing5039
  • devastated and tried to force him to return it. Fast forward, two years later to planning our wedding, MIL had a problem with every aspect of our plans. We are very different and I wanted a
    via No-Nothing5039
  • low key, outdoor, boho wedding while MIL wanted us to be in a church, over- the-top, black tie, etc. I didn't budge. She was so upset that we weren't getting married inside a church that she refused to RSVP and said "we aren't
    via No-Nothing5039
  • sure we will make it there on the day". We tried to ignore the emotional blackmail but my husband was understandably very upset. We just continued to keep their seats for them.
    via No-Nothing5039
  • When planning the bridesmaids colours we just told both his parents and my parents that we just wanted them to not wear 2 colours (as that was the colours of the bridesmaids and groomsmen). Day of the
    via No-Nothing5039
  • wedding MIL shows up at the ceremony wearing the exact colour of my bridesmaids, and dark sunglasses. When people approached her and congratulated her she solemnly responded
    via No-Nothing5039

  • Undercover

    Cheezburger Image 10657496064
    via Mihaela Claudia Puscas

    The MIL with her dark sunglasses

    Featured likenesses do not identify those mentioned

  • "today I am losing a son". After almost 20 minutes of this the officiant confronted her and said "if this is your attitude, you will lose a son. But if you change your attitude you won't just keep your son but you will gain a
    via No-Nothing5039
  • daughter". All our ceremony photos still have her in the front row with her dark sunglasses and solemn look as if she was at a funeral. Then at the reception she had a full outfit change
    via No-Nothing5039
  • and wore the other colour we asked her not to wear. She went table to table whispering in peoples ears, pointing at me and laughing. I was mortified, I didn't like being the centre of attention already so the day was already hard for
    via No-Nothing5039
  • me without her. I almost ran away from my own reception and couldn't even eat anything at my own wedding because I felt so sick from stress with her. Almost 10 years later now and I still
    via No-Nothing5039
  • want to cry thinking about what she stole from my husband and I that day.
    via No-Nothing5039
  • Cheezburger Image 10657497600
    via Glenn Guiao

    The MIL grabbing the groom by the arm

    Model portrayal

  • 1_art_please A narcissistic nightmare of a MiL. Do you guys still have a relationship with her?
    via 1_art_please
  • Brains4Beauty Do a redo for your 10th anniversary and don't invite her. Have a lovely time with only supportive people.
    via Brains4Beauty
  • izthatso Wow, she lost a son. Just a predicted.
    via izhatso
  • SpookyBeck Do not let her get to you. Do not let her see you like this. Act like she does not bother you ar all.
    via SpookyBeck

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entitled parents wedding party wedding drama relationships wedding mother in law entitled people
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