Its fantastic being spastic

You'd probably need to break your legs

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From magicaxis007 (via answers.yahoo.com)

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40+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (June 21, 2025)

40+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (June 21, 2025)

01
‘I came out of my room and yelled at both of them’: 16-year-old snaps at parents after months of nightly arguments, defending his 8-year-old sister and turning the family’s tension into an all-out standoff

‘I came out of my room and yelled at both of them’: 16-year-old snaps at parents after months of nightly arguments, defending his 8-year-old sister and turning the family’s tension into an all-out standoff

02
Company lays off senior employee 2 weeks before Christmas, asks her to redo part of an old project 6 months later: 'They barely gave me any severance. I was unemployed for 6 months.'

Company lays off senior employee 2 weeks before Christmas, asks her to redo part of an old project 6 months later: 'They barely gave me any severance. I was unemployed for 6 months.'

03
Supervisor writes up warehouse employee for not smiling enough at work: 'I work 10-hour shifts moving heavy boxes in a windowless building where we’re not allowed to have earbuds, take phone calls, or speak unless it’s job-related'

Supervisor writes up warehouse employee for not smiling enough at work: 'I work 10-hour shifts moving heavy boxes in a windowless building where we’re not allowed to have earbuds, take phone calls, or speak unless it’s job-related'

04
Manager demands employee take $15k salary cut, they claim that they are starting their own business instead: 'I had been doing the job of 4 people'

Manager demands employee take $15k salary cut, they claim that they are starting their own business instead: 'I had been doing the job of 4 people'

05
19-year-old expected to preoccupy his 2-year-old niece while his older sister ‘takes a mom break,’ gets berated after leaving toddler unattended, despite explicitly sharing he had other plans: ‘She was ignoring me, so I just left'

19-year-old expected to preoccupy his 2-year-old niece while his older sister ‘takes a mom break,’ gets berated after leaving toddler unattended, despite explicitly sharing he had other plans: ‘She was ignoring me, so I just left'

06