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Tumblr Thread Spotlights How Crazy It Is That Court Reporters Can Keep Straight Faces

Court reporters have criminally resilient poker faces. The wild stuff they hear in the courtroom is enough to break down the most hardened of stoic expressions, yet there they are, staring off, listlessly into their papers, noting it all for someone to read through, later on. The real question, is whether you'd hear outbreaks of laughter behind those closed doors. Cause, damn. Some of these are truly unbelievable. If you enjoyed this little segment, check out some of the strangest legal questions lawyers have been asked, over here!

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    Product - foxesandlesbians the-selfie-of-dor.. Source: pandaaamonium. colbi-wankenobi: princemetalthunder: skrill-cosby: drucila616: How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.
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    Text - ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you
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    Text - ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? And last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No.. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitti
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    Text - ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death.. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male. ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to wo
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    Text - ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's 20, much like your lQ. ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) August 8th? was WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getti
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