[Whole Foods]— Todd 'Spooki' Carlos (@TheToddWilliams) October 5, 2015
ME: Do you...uh
CLERK: Do we what?
ME: Do you have any...uh
CLERK: Go on
ME: Do you have any Half Foods?
If I had a nickel for all the "Whole Foods is expensive" jokes I've seen today I could probably buy some peanut butter at Whole Foods.— Liam Boylan-Pett (@liam_bp) June 16, 2017
This woman at Whole Foods is choosing a bundle of asparagus more carefully than I chose my husband.— shauna (@goldengateblond) November 20, 2014
i just remembered the time i was at Whole Foods and a girl took a “broken, do not use” sign off the door a took a selfie with it over her heart and then dropped the sign and walked directly into the broken doors— elijah daniel (@elijahdaniel) February 16, 2019
Got kicked out of Whole Foods for not wearing a tracksuit again— Josh (@iwearaonesie) November 9, 2015
I'm wandering around Whole Foods like tom hanks in The Terminal— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 10, 2015
I just finished shopping at Whole Foods and the cashier did not ask me if I wanted paper or plastic. She said, "do you want to destroy the Earth or did you bring your own bag?" Destroy please. 😔— Mr. Onederful® (@ericonederful) June 16, 2018
going to cash in my 401k so I can start shopping at Whole Foods— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) November 2, 2012
Me: Here's my application for a second mortgage— Doktor J (@doktorj) January 11, 2016
Mgr: Ma'am, this is Whole Foods
M: I'll be buying off the hot bar today
Mgr: Sign here
I just went to Whole Foods and asked for a rec for a good cheddar for mac and cheese, and the employee directed me to a $42.16 block of cheddar. I'm trying to figure out whom I should sue.— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) November 18, 2018
Whole foods advertising for all your Super Bowl needs is like Barnes & Noble taking care of your bachelor party.— Erica (@SCbchbum) January 28, 2016
Omg so embarrassing. So I go shopping at Whole Foods and get all the way to the register only to realize I forgot I don't have a trust fund.— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) September 23, 2016
Whole Foods sells $10 gift cards. The perfect gift for a loved one who wants two onions.— Kevin Farzad (@KevinFarzad) October 17, 2012
"In which aisle can I find the nunchucks?"— Jade Van Kley (@BacklineNurse) January 16, 2015
"Ma'am, this is a Whole Foods"
"Sorry, in which aisle can I find the gluten free nunchucks?"
Whole Foods added a 10 items or less checkout line as if anyone can afford to buy more than 10 items at a Whole Foods.— Mikey (@KrunkedRobot) January 21, 2016
Just saw a woman buying toilet paper at Whole Foods and man it must be wild to be that kind of rich— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) December 9, 2018