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Guy Eats a Boatload of Adderall and Then Goes on Tinder Rampage with DMing All of His Matches

The dude clearly needs to tone it down a notch, and was clearly just a tad bit overstimulated to come across as clear and comprehensive (and sane) with his matches.

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  • 1
    Text - A23 7:06 PM 23% Samantha Jdllidnnd4 1111 ago Well we've already broken the ice but i am bored so im gonna ask you a cheesy ice breaker. If you were in a band what would you name it and what kind of music would you play? 11 min. ago Sneaky Peaches Would be the name. I can see us playing alternative and I would be the chill as fuck bass player Samantha 10 min. ago Very nice. 10 min. ago Send GIF a message...

  • 2
    Text - 22%7:37 PM Samantha You? Samantha 41 min. ago Chill ass bass players are underrater in the band community Norwegian death metal Post-Op Tranny First id have to learn norwegian and actually listen to norwegian death metal though. So its a pipe dream 40 min. ago And I've got to learn how to play bass Samantha 39 min. ago I grew up to a cello prodigy Send a message... GIF G 22

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    Text - 23%7:37 PM < Samantha I grew up to a cello prodigy. Which is kind of base. And i swear to god now that i think about it he was norwegian When him and his brother first moved in. I was like six and they would push each other around the neighborhood in a stroller but naked. Butt naked* 38 min. ago That's a little disturbing Samantha 37 min. ago We were great friends but this dude was a friggin genius. When we were in Send a message... GIF G 23

  • 4
    Text - 24% 7:39 PM Samantha That's a little disturbing Samantha 38 min. ago We were great friends but this dude was a friggin genius. When we were in elementary school, probably 10 years old, adults would ask us what we wanted to when we grew up. I wanted to be a monkey. He wanted to start a political revolution that hunted down the remaing Nazis on earth. And thats how i learned about Nazis I think he's an executive banker now. He taught me how to play chess, and how to lose gracefully because

  • 5
    Text - 25 7:42 PM 25% Samantha never beat him Why am i telling you all of this? 39 min. ago That's a great story Because I'll let you Samantha 39 min. ago Well thank you for the opportunity. 38 min. ago These are things I need to know Samantha 38 min. ago One time I teepeed his house and he hit me in the head with a glas bottle Send a message... GIF

  • 6
    Text - 26 E 7:42 PM 26% Samantha Vne tieTeepeeus house and he hit me in the head with a glas bottle Still have a scar Lol. And we were friends again the next day 38 min. ago I seriously cannot stop laughing Explain the pegging situation Samantha 32 min. ago The pegging. Ah. Well I met a lovely young lady on tinder, such as yourself, and she made me an offer I couldn't refuse. She was really into pegging, so if i let her peg me she'd let me do whatever filtny thing I wanted to her. And I oblige.

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    Text - 26 E 7:42 PM 26% Samantha Explain the pegging situation Samantha 32 min. ago The pegging. Ah. Well I met a lovely young lady on tinder, such as yourself, and she made me an offer I couldn't refuse. She was really into pegging, so if i let her peg me she'd let me do whatever filtny thing I wanted to her. And l oblige. So she comes over with what was quite frankly, an intimidating strap- on, and a bit immasculating by comparison. My first thought is "how many dudes' ass holes has this thing

  • 8
    Text - 26 E 7:43 PM 26% Samantha that I am and ask her to be gentle. Well, she gets a solid 3-4 inches in there and its all i can take because according to her I am "such a fucking pussy." So, she pounds my supple little ass for a solid 15 minutes while rubbing her clit and the nightmare is finally over when she gets off. I had no idea I was capa- ble of making the sounds I was making in the process. I mean, probably the closest i ever came to fufilling childhood dream of being monkey, albeit no

  • 9
    Text - 26 E 7:43 PM 26% Samantha let her finish. As if I couldn't hate myself anymore at this point, the following day shes already planning our next ass slamming rendevous, so I politely let her know that i don't think i can get pegged again, at which point she stops txting me I was used She did fulfill her end of the bargain though, which was cool. 17 min. ago Oh myself Samantha 15 min. ago Indeed 15 min. ago Send a message... GIF

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    Text - 26 F 7:43 PM 26% Samantha Indeed 15 min. ago Part of me feels like this is a joke but then the other part of me tells me you're a great story teller Samantha 14 min. ago Lol i wish it was a joke but the only punchline here is that I got fucking played by an echantress with a penchant for male domination 7 min., ago Sounds like you asked for it Samantha 6 min. ago You know. I did. And the sad part is i learned nothing 3 min. ago Send a message... GIF

    The dude attached the following PSA at the end of his post via Reddit:


    Hey gang, I realize this post is already past its prime but I feel the need to hijack the top comment in order to make something clear. I don't usually like being this guy butt fuck it??


    It wasn't my intention for this post to advocate the abuse of amphetamine based narcotics, such as adderall. While I joke about it, I wish I would have never started taking it. If you are an adult who is already supporting him/herself financially in a professional field, this not a road you want to go down. Even if your just a college/high school student, getting by with decent grades, even if you have the shittiest grades, you need to strongly consider the implications of this decision. Adderall is not a cureall, it is extremely addictive, and can have some very serious long-term side-effects. I have been lucky enough to manage so far but have gone on a number of months long-benders, staying up 2-3 days at a time over and over.


    You think amphetamines are gonna help you lose weight and be more social? Not 3 years from now when you are fucking hooked, taking 3x your dose a day, and not sleeping or eating at all enough when you're on it (sleep deprivation causes massive weight gain) turninh you into a fuckinh zombie and legitimitately weirding people out all over the place, then doing nothing but sleeping and eating when you run out (sleeping and eating like a sloth also causes massive weight gain). It turns into a vicous cycle that is near impossible to get out of.


    It might seem like an easy solution now, and even when you start taking it, things might seem to be going really well, but thats just euphoria from the bubble, and the bubble can last a long time, and no you can't just enjoy a little 6 month maybe 1-2 year bubble. You will be hooked. You can't just get off. I've tried. There is an unbelievable brain fog, it ruins you, and after months of trying i couldnt take it anymore, i almost completely fucked up my business because i couldnt get myself out of that fucking fog. I went back to the rall and promised myself Id keep my dosage steady, which i have had a lot of trouble doing. Even after 6 months cold ass turkey, your tolerance builds right back up.


    Seriously, all you might actually need is to jog a couple miles each morning, instead. I don't want this post to convince a single person who has never taken adderall to try it, but looking at the comments, I see its probably too late for that. Which is why im making this comment.


    Amphetamines are bad news, and while i have been lucky enough to get my shit back in check and keep it there (barely) enough so far to appear like a normal, functioning member of society, i fear i will end up being dependent on it to some extent for the rest of my life. Or that I am just one bender away from rock bottom and too fucking stupid to realize it. I am a fucking slave to this shit, drone-like even, I feel like a pathetic loser the way i depend on it at times.


    When I run out of adderall, every dream i have is about adderall and it fucking sucks. My greatest fear on this planet is that stimulant based prescription meds will somehow dissapear and my life will just completely fall apart, forcing me to turn to something like meth (oral) in order to maintain.


    And guys, I'm not joking. I think it might be starting to fuck with my dick a little.

    Just don't do it.

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