Dating Nightmares: 'Scrooging' Is The New 'Ghosting' - Women Reveal Their Stories
"Scrooging is the dating trend that inevitably rears its ugly head every holiday season.
What is 'Scrooging,' you ask?
Scrooging is the term used when a person breaks up with their significant other before or in the midst of the holiday season...and it sucks. Whether they were too cheap to buy a gift, or they weren't quite committed enough to make the obligatory family introductions, there is something about the holidays that spawns an annual 'break up' epidemic. But alas! No need to let your Scrooging Grinch of an ex ruin your holiday cheer. Having the support of friends and family — and an excess of food and eggnog — can help ease the pain of heartbreak and may even jumpstart a new beginning. We teamed up with The Single Society to share the most painful holiday breakups that ultimately left these strong women much better off.
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1. Mehgan, 32
After dating Ryan for about four months I was excited to throw a Pinterest-worthy Christmas soiree for all my friends and finally make our debut as a couple. The day before the party Ryan and I spent the entire day decorating the tree, baking cookies, and having sex. Lots of sex. Ryan went home the morning of (after having sex, yet again) to get a change of clothes and freshen up for the party. An hour and a half into the party my friends had all arrived, but there was still no sign of my boyfriend.
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My anger turned to worry as the hours went on and people continued to question Ryan's whereabouts. Several unanswered texts later my friend pointed out that Ryan was tagged in a mutual friend's Instagram story, and they were clearly out at another party.
It then became evident that he had blocked me on all social media forums.
Finally, I received a response to my texts:
"Hey. I'm sure you know by now that this just isn't working for me. I am really sorry it had to play out like it did, but I hope the party was fun."
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It was the most classless and selfish move I have ever witnessed. There is no way in hell I would want to spend my life with someone who is capable of having sex with me multiple times knowing that he was not only going to dump me hours later but completely humiliate me in front of my friends.
Having a few days off work, my friends to rally around me, and multiple holiday parties to attend was essential for healing my healing process.
As it turns out Ryan did me a favor. I met my future husband at a New Year's Eve party that year.
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2. Katherine, 29
Craig and I were together for five months. We had yet to discuss labels but spent essentially every night together by the time December rolled around. I had already planned to spend Christmas with my family in London, so we decided to have our own celebration a week before. I left work early to spruce up my apartment and wrap the brand new iPad he had mentioned he wanted.
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Craig showed up and was acting noticeably distant. I chalked it up to a busy day at work, and we sat down to open presents. When it was my turn to open his present for me he handed me a crinkled gift bag with a coffee mug (I don't drink coffee) and a small teddy bear inside. Not long after he opened his gifts he dropped the bomb that he no longer saw a future for us.
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I told Craig where to shove his mug/teddy bear, and I would be keeping (and returning) the iPad, to which he begrudgingly agreed.
Looking back on this situation and our relationship as a whole I finally saw that Craig was a cheap and selfish person, and it took his literal 'parting gift' to make me realize that I deserved so much more. Bullet dodged.
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Carly, 30
Lindsay and I were together for the better part of a year when she completely broke my heart just in time for Christmas before I was the victim of Scrooging.
I had come out to my immediate family five years prior, but this Christmas I was bringing home a serious girlfriend for the first time.
I bought tickets for Lindsay and me to fly down to my parent's house the day before Christmas Eve. We decided to meet at the airport the following morning as Lindsay had to work late the previous day.
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I arrived at the airport and Lindsay was nowhere to be found. Since her phone was clearly off I figured perhaps it died or something else had happened to it, so I decided to go through security and wait for her at the gate.
Lindsay never showed. As I landed I got a text from her saying that she hopes I have a great Christmas, but she decided she thought we were moving too fast.
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My parents, anxious to meet Lindsay, picked (only) me up at the airport. I had to break the news to them that I had just been dumped via text.
The silver lining to being broken up with before Christmas was the unwavering support of my family. Truly, family is everything.
Early in the New Year Lindsay contacted me again wanting to see me, but I had already decided to move on.
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4. Jessica, 33
Eric and I got pretty serious soon after we first met and were dating for six months when the holiday season arrived. Thinking Eric was the one, I wanted to splurge on a nice watch for him. We had plans to fly out of state to spend Christmas with his family (much to my family's dismay) but wanted to have our own intimate Christmas together as well.
After our dinner reservation, I surprised him with tickets to see his favorite comedian. We had a wonderful evening then returned to my apartment to exchange gifts…or so I thought. Eric said he left the gift he bought me at his place because he didn't want to carry it around all night. I was so anxious for him to see his watch, so I coaxed him to open his gift.
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The next few days Eric was unresponsive via text and didn't seem too keen on spending time with me, but I figured he simply had a lot to do before taking off for the holiday. I brushed it off and looked forward to meeting his family
When I couldn't get a hold of him the night before we were supposed to leave (December 23rd) I needed answers. I showed up at his apartment around 11 PM demanding an explanation. Sure enough, Eric told me that he thought I was a great person but didn't our relationship going any further.
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After bawling the entire cab ride home I spent several hours on the phone with the airline trying to change my flight to visit my family instead, but last minute flight before Christmas was cost-prohibitive. The next day my best friend (who doesn't celebrate Christmas) pulled up in her car to make the 10-hour road trip with me so I could be with my family, allowing me to see what a ride or die bitch my best friend truly is.
Eric may have heartlessly discarded me, but he did prove he wasn't a total Scrooging dick by returning the watch. I am now married to the man of my dreams. I am extremely grateful that Eric showed his true colors before I wasted any more time on him.
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