An Ode To Samantha Jones And The Lessons She Taught Us About Sex

• Sometimes the old masturbating tricks just don’t cut it

  

  Even Samantha, who knows how her body works, sometimes can't reach a delicious climax. Even we aren't our best partners sometimes. And when that's the case, that's usually a sign that you need to add a new toy or two to your collection with a couple of extra levels and some new wonderful features.

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• When we’re horizontal, height doesn’t really matter

  

  Chemistry is chemistry. And Samantha Jones knows you gotta at least try the guy out. Hopefully, at least one of you readers will get rid of the "has to be over 6'3" in your tinder bio.

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• Don’t… I’m telling you, DON’T GO BACK FOR MORE

  

  It's so rare that going back to an ex is a good idea that you might as well just make it a rule that it ISN'T a good idea. Samantha put it best:

  
  

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• It’s why summer dresses are so popular

  

  
  

  Harry Styles is in a dress on the cover of Vogue. James Fraser is winning our hearts in his wee kilt. Samantha, will you just go ahead and say what we're all really thinking?

  
  

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• You have to know what you’re dressing for

  

  
  

  Fashion is the best way to tell the world who you are and what you're feeling. And sometimes you have to help the sales lady help you.

  
  

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• What’s the point of being single if you can’t have constant access to your own vagina?

  

  
  

  You don't have to wait for anyone to get home to get started. You don't have to deny yourself if someone else is not in the mood. Hell, why should any of this stop if you're in a relationship? Samantha certainly has the right idea.

  
  

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• The best kind of party is a party you’re not “supposed” to have

  

  
  

  Why celebrate having a relationship when you can celebrate not having a relationship? Why celebrate having a baby when you can celebrate not having a baby? Samantha knows you need to celebrate your life for what it actually is and not only when others tell you how to celebrate it.

  
  

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• You might as well move the f**k on

  

  
  

  The remake is happening, whether Samantha is in it or not. Unfotuantely, however, the only person you'll punish by thinking about it is yourself.

  
  

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