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College Professors Reveal the Dumbest Things Their Students Have Done

schimkom Posted by schimkom
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  • 1

    Everyday is Arm Day for me.

    Text - [ waterwings30 2777 polnts 11 hours ago TA here, my favorite was a student who came up to the professor after class and asked if he could take the quiz a day late because it was on arm day and his arms would be too tired to write. permalink embed
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  • 2

    Life's a beach, so it must have an ocean.

    Text - [-] MrsAnthropy 5311 points 11 hours ago* I overheard two students have the following conversation: Student 1: Isn't it awesome we get to live right by the ocean?! Student 2: That's not an ocean. 1: But it has a beach. If it's not the ocean, what is it? 2: I don't know. I work in Chicago
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  • 3

    When I grow up, I want to be a Xerox machine.

    Text - [- vvsj 3886 points 14 hours ago Word for word fucking copying of an assignment. Even down to the other guy's student number, spelling mistakes, and format. EDIT: Consolidating some stuff mentioned in later posts 1. I gave both a 0 for the assignment. 2. Smart guy deliberately gave his assignment to the dunce to be copied 3. Department policy is to fail both in cases like this; obviously it's different if dunce stole smart's assignment and copied. 4. This cuts down on cheating either by p
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  • 4

    The tale of Rhetoric begins...

    Text - [- montegarde 2343 points 10 hours ago Not me, but my aunt has taught college and high school-level history courses. She once assigned a paper on something to do with the role of rhetoric in the Roman Empire. I don't remember the exact wording of her assignment, but it was something to this effect. A student, completely and entirely missing the point of the assignment, and possibly of the English language in general, spun an elaborate paper of the fictional life and military and political
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  • 5

    What a glass-hole

    Text - [-] vadlmaster 1423 points 11 hours ago* TA for a glassblowing class my university has. So my school is very STEM focused, like 70% engineering majors, so there isn't a lot of artistic talent among us but some people are really bad. So I had one guy who was struggling and no matter what I did he just wasn't getting it, his pieces where generally very small, sloppy, asymmetrical, etc. So for his final he hands in this beautiful vase, cool colors, symmetric, nice size and weight. Well the p
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  • 6

    Not so much a history class as a future class.

    Text - [] chupagatos 3616 points 12 hours ago College course. Students are asked to estimate the date in which Attila took over Europe (it wasn't a history class, the goal was showing that people's estimates are influenced by those of the people around them). Except that the first girl said "6000". When the professor said "6000? 6000 what?" she replied "AD" permalink embed
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  • 7

    Just taking tests for fun.

    Text - -] ghpkhg 6247 points 15 hours ago I was at a final, one time, and the professor was counting the students. He then said "I printed off exactly enough tests, but there appears to be one more student than test. So, if you're here, and have never seen my face, please leave." SOMEONE GOT UP AND LEFT We are all very confused what that dude was thinking.
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  • 8

    Make your own test.

    Text - [- RPMI1640 5673 points 13 hours ago Here's a story from one of my husband's colleagues: After an exam, a student told the professor, "I didn't know the answers to the essay questions, so I made up my own essay questions and answered them." The professor replied, "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, and when I go to lunch, I'm going to tell all my friends." permalink embed
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  • 9

    All tests discriminate against the non-thinking.

    Text - -] NorthernSparrow 2664 points 14 hours ago* Not me but a colleague. 2 students came to see him during office hrs with a complaint: "Your exams discriminate against students who can't think." He swears that's a direct quote. I think they must've meant to say something like, "...can't think under pressure," but that's not how it came out. Out of morbid curiosity he asked them what their major was. Answer: "We're both pre-med." Yeah, you might wanna rethink that plan, kids....
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