Insane Lies People Heard From Compulsive Liars

Author image for Eric Lund
Eric Lund
Jan 31, 2022 10:00 AM EST

It's always interesting to slowly realize that you're talking to a pathological liar. Usually it starts with an intriguing hook. "Oh man, I can't eat Oreos," says a strange gentleman at the Jimmy Buffet themed bar you always seem to find yourself in on Thursdays.

"Really man? It is because of the sugar? Sometimes too much sugar gives me a stomach ache" you say, trying to make friendly conversation.

"Yeah, it could be that," he says, being reasonable enough to keep you involved. "But they have a chemical in there that stains your teeth."

"Oh really? I guess the chocolate parts of it do kind of get stuck in my teeth a lot. It's like spinach, haha" you say, because you are very good at conversation. You're terrific.

"No," he continues. "It's a tracking device. See I used to work for the CIA. Psy ops. I worked in Brazil in the 70's. I was the front man for a rock group that was really popular there. We sang in Portuguese, so you haven't heard any of our songs. Anyway, Mondelez foods, the owner of Oreos, is a front for the CIA, and my rock group was sponsored by Oreos so that we could install tracking devices into all the mouths of the royal family there. But then our cover was blown. My bassist was a double agent. Turns out the Oreos were being used to track US. And that's why I'm off the grid. Can't touch an Oreo or else I'll be extradited to Sao Paulo and charged for my crimes." He takes a sip of Bud and looks at you with wide eyes, waiting, expecting, demanding that you believe him. It's the only thing he wants in this whole world.

"Oh. That's really interesting, man. I have to go."



Some people lie as an excuse, and others lie because they're deeply insecure and want to impress people. But the most interesting liars are the ones who lie for no conceivable reason, like these absurd lies people's parents told them as kids.

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  • 01
    Font - BarneyFifesSchlong - 2 days ago He used to lie about military service, saying he was an Army Ranger in the 101st Airborne infantry. When someone pointed out they were actually two different soldiers he'd flip out. He'd also flip out if you pointed out he couldn't have gone to university of Idaho and have served in the military and have been working in our industry as long as he claimed.
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  • 02
    Font - qgwheurbwbli - 2 days ago Her dad hired an assassin to kill her and her mother and was in jail. She mentioned a couple of weeks later that she was going to her dad's house for the weekend. She would point at ANYONE remotely attractive and say "I've slept with them". She tried to fake a phone call once pretending to talk to a boy she was seeing, so I called her phone and it rang while she was mid sentence. She stuttered in embarrassment and then said, "you calling me must have cut my call
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  • 03
    Font - Otherwise_Bill_5898 · 2 days ago I worked with a guy like this.... every story was a lie. He told me he surveyed the football stadium in our town prior to its construction. I checked the dates.... he was a qualified surveyor at 6 years old! Then he told me his body chemistry was immune to acid. You could pour battery acid on him and it would not affect him. There were dozens of small ones and a few real big ones.
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  • 04
    Font - kenos99 - 2 days ago Just that every single story anyone had to share he had a story to top that one. Got high score on a game? He got higher. Had an awesome vacation? His was better? Climbed a mountain? So did he... but without fear? Got into a bar fight? He once fought 4 dudes at once! It was like that every single time.
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  • 05
    Font - post_angst · 2 days ago I went to high school with a pathological liar that you could just nudge a tiny bit and he'd go off on these long, elaborate and impossible stories. You'd just say 'And then what happened, Ricky?' and he'd just keep going. The best one was when he supposedly got chased by a police helicopter through the woods while stashing an 18-pack of beer down his pants. He ended up outrunning the helicopter and because of it the police said 'You're cool' over the loudspeaker o
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  • 06
    Font - apple-teeth - 2 days ago · edited 2 days ago O O 5 I used to work with a guy.... Let's call him Kerr, because that was his name. He used to tell these insanely ridiculous stories about how all his mates are millionaires. And how he used to own all these business and only worked here because he wanted to fill his time. He drove a smashed up Citroën C2. Every story was clearly stolen and seemed to always include, a Mk1 Ford Escort Rs Cosworth Black edition. He also had to one up your story.
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  • 07
    Font - hunstinx - 2 days ago That he and his wife were in a loveless marriage, basically nothing more than roommates that had stayed together this long because of their kid. But they were now in the final stages of divorce. His wife was not aware of any of this.
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  • 08
    Rectangle - DragonRaccoon -2 days ago He was friends with the first guy who sold 10,000 Bitcoin for 1 pizza. Interesting thing was that we had many friends in common and I got to hear from each friend as the story evolved.
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  • 09
    Font - krshit - 2 days ago A guy told me that he found an abandoned stable in his backyard that had living horses in it. I asked how/what the horses ate and he couldn't give me an answer. This would already be stupid enough, but we lived in the city, 2 blocks from each other.
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  • 10
    Font - Oudeis16 · 2 days ago Had a college roommate claim he had an uncle on the Supreme Court. I asked him to name one Justice. Just one. Not like, which is your uncle. Just name any of them.
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  • 11
    Human body - your_late · 2 days ago I had a college frat brother tell me used to get pounds of weed from Baltimore. I asked him which state is Baltimore in. He said Virginia.
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  • 12
    Organism - Squantoon - 2 days ago I worked with a guy who had some issues. He got big into paracord braclets and was always trying to sell them to people at work. He once told us he fell out of a tree hunting took his paracord braclet off managed to tie his foot off to a branch while falling then hanging upside down immediately shot a deer.
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  • 13
    Font - Stoneless69 - 2 days ago Guy was late to work 15min, said hes late because his friend got shot 47 times...i said i am so sorry to hear that, he said "its ok, hes stable in the hospital"
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  • 14
    Rectangle - brandonmufc06 · 2 days ago That she used to be a bus driver before she worked in the shop I used to work at. A couple months later I found out she doesn't even have a driver's licence lol
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  • 15
    Font - Jtownusa - 2 days ago My old co-worker was a chronic liar and was constantly telling absolute whoopers. He purchased drugs from our other co-worker on credit. (we worked at a Shaw's deli so this type of activity was quite normal) Well, big mistake on her part because this ft.'ker "never had his wallet" or "just spent his last dollar" and so on and so forth. Finally she gets sick of it and says "Listen, tomorrow is payday so I want the money you owe me." We all end up working together the
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  • 16
    Font - "Guy, the craziest thing happened to me last night. After work I went out to the bar and I met this French girl. She was an absolute smoke show, hottest girl you've ever seen etc.. We have a few drinks and really hit it off. I end up back at her place and of course I smashed. I drive home and go to bed. The next day I realized that I left my pants at her apartment. So I drive back to her place and knock on the door. Her roommate answers. I say: is Bianca home? She says no, she went back t
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  • 17
    Font - TurtleDaisies · 2 days ago I got this! My sister is a compulsive liar, among many other things. Growing up - kids would stop by our house to see our new puppies...that we didn't have. My friend had a baby, she took photos and told people at school it was hers. She hasn't held a job longer than 3 months in her almost 40 years of life. Yet, she tells people she was a nurse, a police officer, a 911 operator. She tells people we don't speak because she needed a kidney transplant and I refused
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  • 18
    Font - She told my mom she won the 'Best Undercover Police Officer of the Year' award and got a trophy. She sent my mom a photo, to which my mom posted it on Facebook. It was the World Cup Trophy! She had faked numerous pregnancies...downloading fake ultrasound pics and everything. Has the baby showers, loses said fake baby (she had her tubes tied many years ago). She then returns the gifts for money to support her drug habit. In regards to said drug habit, she once stabbed herself to get pain m
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  • 19
    Font - She claimed she was the first person in our state to get Covid. The doctors thought she was dying, until they found the right medicine and now call her a medical miracle. She is waiting for her story in the upcoming medical journal. I could write a book with her 'stories'. She needs help but that would require her to admit there is a problem. People have sought me out to ask me if this or that is true. I love being honest! I confront her on these stories and I am the bad person for doubti
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  • 20
    Font - sonheungwin - 2 days ago S The worst lies are actually the insignificant ones. The ones where they didn't need to lie but did just because. When they lie about important sh't, at least you can somewhat understand. When they like about meaningless sh't, you realize you just can't trust them.
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  • 21
    Font - Churchy_leFemme · 2 days ago · edited 1 day ago Dated one of these and it ended pretty horrifically. She was beautiful, talented, her family had plenty of money, and had a pretty interesting life with no need for extra embellishment, but looking back half the stories she told me turned out to be false (so-and-so yelled at me, that mutual friend hit on me, etc) and then would gaslight when i was skeptical. Now thinking back I can't tell when she was telling the truth. Messes with your head
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  • 22
    Font - braindamnager · 2 days ago I've got an acquaintance named Skip and every time I see him he's got some kind of insane bullst it to tell me. Last time I saw him, he was telling me he was robbed at gunpoint while buying a trailer, so he pulled his personal carry firearm and shot the robber three times in the chest, protecting himself and his fiancé. The police "cleared him on the spot and gave him his pistol back". We live in a tiny town, Skip. That didn't happen. This conversation ended wit
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  • 23
    Font - ray52 · 2 days ago We had a kid at my high school who was obsessed with convincing everyone he was rich. He would always talk about his Dads lambos, how he didn't have a job but "Had money coming in". It was interesting because no one would ask and he'd just keep pushing the lie. Eventually he posted a bank account photo on FB to "prove" how rich he was, and it was literally the first google result "big bank account". It was sad.
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  • 24
    Font - Ampanampanampan 2 days ago · edited 1 day ago His fake tan was because he was born in Puerto Rico (he was born in rural England to white English parents). The fake tan would get very patchy, and that would be explained away by him saying he had a terrible skin disorder. One so bad his own skin could stain his clothing. The white shirts unbuttoned far too low for him to be considered a reasonable gentleman did not help to cover that up for him.
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  • 25
    Font - ChalkDstTorture · 2 days ago He said tons of ridiculous sit, but the craziest was that his older brother (he said he has 18 brothers) is three months older than him. Not twins. Same moms. Separate pregnancies. He couldn't explain it but told me they have a computer working on figuring out how it happened. Also he said he used to weigh 900 pounds. He hung his 100 inch waist size pants on the wall above his bed and every morning when he wakes up he stares at them and says “never again."
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