Most Absurd Lies People's Parents Told Them

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mattstaff
Apr 3, 2021 10:00 AM EDT

Just because they're your parents doesn't mean that they're also not prone to coming up with all kinds of absurd lies that you only end up realizing later on in life were pure works of impressive, mind blowing fiction. Maybe these people's stories of their parents' most ridiculous lies will resonate for some folks. 

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  • 01
    Font - Prossdog · 13h 2 Awards If we couldn't decide on a restaurant, my dad would tell us we'd better make up our minds quick or he'd take us to Vegetable World. I was like 11 before I realized it wasn't a real restaurant. By golly, it worked until then though. 6 Reply 1.8k 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 02
    Font - Pickle_Rick236 • 17h 1 Award I was told that Star Wars was real. Didn't take too long to figure that one out. G Reply 4 1.5k ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 03
    Rectangle - covidongrounds • 14h 2 Awards My dad told me that every pickle you eat adds 5 minutes on your life. I was like 5 and damn did I ever take that to heart. G Reply 1.5k ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 04
    Font - Electronic-Ad3386 • 14h That my uncle got cancer from having lunchables for lunch at school. Like damn, just tell me we can't afford it. G Reply 219 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 05
    Font - Moctor_Drignall · 12h My dad has ridiculous cold tolerance. He's the kind of guy that will be out in shorts and a t-shirt when it's 36 °F outside. When I was six, I asked him how he was able to stand it, and he told me he just absorbed heat all summer long and stored it for the winter. He worked outdoors all summer, so it made perfect sense to six year old me. Reply 632 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 06
    Rectangle - rugbyprop86 · 14h "Don't worry about paying for college, we'll take care of the monthly payments: we'll figure it out!" Narrator: They didn't G Reply 1.9k 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 07
    Rectangle - primalscreem • 17h 1 Award A friend told me their parents would take them to "the toy museum" aka FAO Schwartz, and nothing is for sale there, they just display the toys. A G Reply 4 1.8k ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 08
    Font - RawnJonald • 16h 1 Award That it was illegal to turn the lights on in the car while driving at night G Reply 1.2k 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 09
    Font - EWBAMD • 17h 3 Awards when I was like 5 my mom said she can give birth to puppies G Reply 4 2.0k 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 10
    Font - Somerandomwizard • 15h 'Getting a job is easy! Just walk in, ask for the manager, give a firm handshake and boom!' Reply 1.2k ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 11
    Font - Springtrappity · 15h staring at the microwave could give you cancer 6 Reply 975 ... +
    via r/AskReddit
  • 12
    Font - rorskies • 15h Those are tomato plants. G Reply 267 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 13
    Handwriting - Kragur • 16h My dad told me not to put silverware in the fridge becuase it would poison the food. My brother beleived it until he was 25. G Reply 717 3 •..
    via r/AskReddit
  • 14
    Font - misscuzzi • 13h We lived off a dirt road with many potholes. My dad told me that they were made by people sneaking out of the woods in the middle of the night and stealing a shovel full of dirt. G Reply 74 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 15
    Font - 99justlooking · 14h "They only tease you because they like you." G Reply 1 208 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 16
    Handwriting - flwrgrlconnie • 16h My mom would always sip my drink and eat some of my food and said it was to see if it was poisoned but really just wanted some lol. G Reply 132 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 17
    Organism - 1BoiledCabbage • 12h I asked my dad where babies came from. He told me that he found me and my sisters in my mom's cabbages. All he had to do was flip over the leaves and he saw our faces and pulled us out . My sisters and I spent hours looking for new babies. G Reply 894 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 18
    Handwriting - genraq · 15h You learn to whistle by eating all of your sandwich crusts. If you can keep from licking the hole after losing a tooth the replacement will grow in SOLID GOLD! G Reply 1 156 ...
    via r/AskReddit

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