AITA : 'I'm not raising a cheater' : Unhinged Husband Pressures Wife to Punish 7-Year-Old Daughter for Having More Than 1 Play Boyfriends, Insists She Needs a Lesson in Faithfulness

Advertisement
  • 01
    Purple - AITA for not punishing my 7 yo daughter for her play-relationships? My husband and I have a 7 year old daughter together, Layla. A few months ago, Layla got a "boyfriend", Lucas. They are both 7, so it's obviously not a real relationship. They just hold hands sometimes and they drew each other hearts for valentines day. This week, Layla was apparently holding hands with another boy - who also sent Layla a valentine's day love letter - and Lucas took offence to it. We found out because L
  • 02
    Font - Posted by u/Efficient Ad4006 2 days ago AITA for not punishing my 7 yo daughter for her play-relationships?
  • 03
    Font - My husband and I have a 7 year old daughter together, Layla. A few months ago, Layla got a "boyfriend", Lucas. They are both 7, so it's obviously not a real relationship. They just hold hands sometimes and they drew each other hearts for valentines day.
  • 04
    Font - This week, Layla was apparently holding hands with another boy - who also sent Layla a valentine's day love letter - and Lucas took offence to it. We found out because Lucas' parents called to tell us Lucas won't be coming over to us this Saturday like it was originally planned, because he is mad at Layla.
  • 05
    Font - My husband wants us to punish Layla and wants me to have a talk with her about faithfulness. At first I thought he was joking, but no, he was serious. He says that Layla cheated on Lucas and I, as her mother, should do something about it.
  • 06
    Font - I told my husband that Layla is 7, not a cheater and I won't treat her as such. He then accused me of "raising a cheater" and encouraging the bad behaviour. AITA for not wanting to punish Layla?
  • 07
    Font - Gr4nd45 2 days ago Partassipant [1] She's 7. It's ridiculous to call her a "cheater". At the same time, you can sit her down and explain why Lucas is upset and doesn't want to see her. That's more than enough of a lesson. NTA.
  • 08
    Font - jane_q 2 days ago Yeah, NTA. An explanation is appropriate, but not an accusation or punishment. Kinda worried about her husband...
  • 09
    Human body - PM-me-Gophers. 2 days ago I'm getting uber-religious vibes off the husband
  • 10
    Font - TinyGreenTurtles 2 days ago Yeah I didn't want to go there but it really gave me a "purity culture" vibe.
  • 11
    Font - princessk1293 - 2 days ago I grew up in a "purity culture" family. My parents would not have even blinked at this at age 7. I had multiple "boyfriends" from about age 5 to about age 9 and my sister had a "husband" for a hot minute in first grade. They knew it was just normal development.
  • 12
    Font - Jakyland 2 days ago Q Yeah, everyone is saying "Talk to Layla about feelings" when really the important advice is "Talk to your husband about not being an abusive and unhinged father". 2
  • 13
    Font - freckledreddishbrown 2 days ago And add to that, somebody please have a talk to Lucas about friendship, boundaries, and consent. If he's bent out of shape because his girl friend has another boy friend at seven, he'll make the worst of boyfriends at 27.
  • 14
    Hair - Ok-Penalty7568 - 2 days ago The "you're the mother you have to do it" is also a bit concerning
  • 15
    Font - NanoRaptoro. 2 days ago I'm worried for Lucas, too. "Cheating" by holding a different child's hand isn't a concept a 7 year old would generally understand, independently identify, or skip a play date over. They're seven. Seven.
  • 16
    Font - Forsaken_Ordinary669 2 days ago Makes me wonder if he would react the same had the genders been reversed
  • 17
    Font - Ecstatic_Long_3558 2 days ago A son would be getting a hive five and "that's my boy, a real player. Good job"
  • 18
    Font - Soft Two989. 2 days ago 2 92 9 What is happening with these comments framing this as analogous to an adult relationship?? This isn't about faithfulness and cheating. This is about a very common dynamic among children: jealousy and exclusion. Leaving someone out, which engenders jealousy responses.
  • 19
    Font - Kid antics emerge in various directions, the bf/gf language isn't the point. Explain to Layla that Lucas is feeling jealous. This isn't because she's done anything wrong, it's a natural feeling people need to learn to contend with, and that often comes from feeling excluded or unvalued. Perhaps consider encouraging her to be inclusive of Lucas, rather than pursing friendship dynamics that are just about 2 friends at once. It'd be nice if Lucas's
  • 20
    Font - parents were having that same conversation with him. Layla should *not* be getting the message (as a 7 year old girl) that it's her job to make the men around her comfortable and happy. She should be getting the message that friends care about each other and try to include one another. Definitely don't micromanage little people dynamics.

Tags

Scroll Down For The Next Article