‘Women wear dresses, men wear suits’ : Bride & Groomzilla Instate Strict Wedding Dress Code Based on Gender, Expecting Non-binary Sibling to [Put Aside Their Identity for a Day] and Comply

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  • 01
    Smile - Posted by u/modernbaseballfan69 13 hours ago 2 2 AITA for refusing to attend my brother's wedding because of the dress code?
  • 02
    Font - My brother is getting married in a few months and his future wife recently asked me to be a part of her bridal party. I was thrilled and excited to be included, but then she informed me that the dress code for the bridal party was gender-specific, with women expected to wear dresses and men expected to wear suits. As
  • 03
    Font - someone who identifies as non-binary and is more masculine presenting, I am uncomfortable with conforming to a gender binary that doesn't accurately represent me. I brought this up with my brother and his fiancé, but they insisted that they wanted all their guests to adhere to the dress code, regardless of how it made them feel.
  • 04
    Font - I ultimately decided that I did not want to attend the wedding, as I did not feel comfortable being pressured to conform to a gender binary that doesn't accurately represent me. My brother and his fiancé are now upset with me, accusing me of being difficult and not willing to compromise.
  • 05
    Font - After a fight with them, I found out they went behind my back and involved my mom. She called me yesterday and told me I can put aside my identity for one day to make the day special for my little brother.
  • 06
    Font - I now feel bad and didn't realize something as small as the clothes I feel comfortable wearing would cause a rift within my family. So AITA for refusing to go to the wedding?
  • 07
    Product - poeadam 13 hr. ago + & 6 More Commander in Cheeks [246] "Put aside my identity for one day". Uh, no. ΝΤΑ
  • 08
    Font - It is fine for them to dictate the formality of the wedding. It is not fine for them to dictate your preferred gender expression. A suit that is on the same level of formality as suits others are wearing should be considered just fine.
  • 09
    Font - privatecaboosey. 13 hr. ago. edited 9 hr. ago Came here for this. Also, if I got a wedding invitation that specified that women "must" wear dresses and men "must" wear suits I would mock that couple relentlessly because how out of touch and stupid can you be?!
  • 10
    Font - ETA: OP stated further down in the comments that the dresses for women/pants for men rule applies to the entire guest list, not just the bridal party.
  • 11
    Font - Amadai 12 hr. ago ● Partassipant [1] I had a date with a guy and he told me to wear a dress. I wore a suit to be difficult.
  • 12
    Font - KrisKat77 11 hr. ago Partassipant [1] The only clothes someone can tell me to wear are ones for my safety depending on the activity.
  • 13
    Font - itzcoatl82 11 hr. ago Partassipant [1] Yeah that's a no. It's one thing to communicate that the event is outdoors/casual/busines s/formal/black-tie, etc. so you can dress appropriately to the place & occasion.... Another thing entirely to micromanage your outfit. Ewwww.

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