'Just throw the whole man away': Boyfriend making $80k/year refuses to pitch $50 for his poor girlfriend's IUD, gets roasted on Reddit

Author image for Jesse Kessenheimer
Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Jun 16, 2023 4:00 PM EDT

For some reason, society has deemed birth control as a woman's responsibility. Obviously, the woman would be the one to carry a baby should there be an accidental pregnancy or something, but as we all know, it takes two to tango. She didn't just knock herself up! Although it's a controversial subject to some, we all know that it requires two people to make a baby, so shouldn't it be two people's responsibility to try and prevent one? 

In this case, one woman was put in a bind when faced with that question. She and her long-term boyfriend had recently had a pregnancy scare and she wanted to upgrade their BC method to the most iron-clad, bullet-proof method: the IUD. Now, because of her health insurance, the IUD would cost close to $400, which is a lot of money for a struggling college student. So she called in the calvary and asked her boyfriend (who was making a good salary and living at home with no expenses), to swoop in and cover the measly $50 of the procedure that she couldn't swing. 

He flat out refused and blew up in her face. 

Keep scrolling for all the juicy details of this birth control nightmare that uncovered one boyfriend's serious red flags. For more blatant red flag stories, check out this 'golden retriever' boyfriend who was anything but.

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  • 01
    Joint - "Your boyfriend is a walking red flag"
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  • 02
    Human body - Two YAKED r/TwoHotTakes. Posted by u/swagshawty12 22 hours ago AITA for asking my boyfriend to help me pay for my IUD? | ALTA
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  • 03
    Font - I feel like the title explains enough but I wanted to give some background. I (21F) have been dating my boyfriend (23M) for only about 6 months. I have not been on the pill for about a year now because I have experienced some bad side effects in the past. My boyfriend has been using condoms but we've both talked (due to several reasons but mostly a recent mild pregnancy scare) about getting me on another, more reliable form of BC. I looked into getting an IUD and unfortunately even with i
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  • 04
    Font - This is due to the procedure not being covered by insurance (the cost of the IUD itself is, just not the insertion). I am in college and have to pay bills as I live in my own apartment so this is really expensive for me. My boyfriend is still living with his parents to save money but has a degree and makes around 80k a year. I asked him if he would consider paying for around 50 of the $400.
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  • 05
    Font - I told him that I don't expect him to pay for all or even half but pitching in a little (especially because I have to go to the appointment alone and drive 45 minutes both ways) would be really appreciated. I let him know that this was not expected of him but it would be really helpful. He sorta blew up on me.
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  • 06
    Font - I was confused and asked him why this was such a big thing. He stated that he has never heard of girls paying for an IUD and that I have never paid for his condoms. I told him that he had never asked me to do so and also reminded him that this is something that benefits both of us in the long run. I stated again that this was not expected of him but reiterated why I thought it would be helpful given that it is beneficial for us both and made a comment about our financial situations and ho
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  • 07
    Font - I NEVER ask him to pay for things for me so when he made this next comment it came out of left field. He said "I feel like you're lying and you're just trying to get money out of me". I reassured him that it is not the case and again that it is not expected. Guys am I being an asshole here? This is technically MY procedure and I could use cheaper forms of BC like the pill.
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  • 08
    Font - INFO: I do not live in the US so insurance is different. I was born there but I don't currently live there. I converted the money to an approximate USD because it made more sense for me and I was hoping majority of the people on here would understand that better too.
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  • 09
    Font - brunette_mama. 1 day ago NTA. Your boyfriend is also a walking red flag. If you lurk long enough on subreddits centered around moms and children you'll see pregnant women or moms with babies asking people if it's normal their husbands make them save money on their own to afford to take maternity leave. I've also seen husbands on those subreddits asking why they should have to pay for things like breastfeeding necessities and supplies because they won't be the ones breastfeeding.
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  • 10
    Font - Atomicleta 1 day ago This exactly. He's happy to sleep with her but all the results are on her. Reply Share 371 OkieLady1952- 23 hr. ago Even pregnancy will be on her, whatever that decision would be if she got pregnant. I see this AH ghosting her if she became pregnant especially if she kept the baby. NTA but bf is!
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  • 11
    Rectangle - Prestigious-Ad-2876 - 1 day ago edited 21 hr. ago He makes 80k but lives with his parents, he makes accusations of thievery over 400 dollars. That isn't really looking good no.
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  • 12
    Rectangle - alle kinder 21 hr. ago Even worse, he's making the accusation over $50. FIFTY DOLLARS IS NOTHING AT THAT TAX BRACKET.
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  • 13
    Font - Educational_Ebb7175 16 hr. ago I wouldn't say $50 is nothing at 80k/year. But it is reasonably non-consequential. However, $50 to your significant other is absolutely trivial. And $50 for a semi-permanent (not weekly/monthly I mean) procedure so that you and her can take a roll in the hay as often as you want without wrapping it up? She deserves so much better than this guy.
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  • 14
    Font - ShinyAppleScoop 15 hr. ago ...well maybe a romantic dinner later that week. I was crampy as hell for the first few days. Still worth it! I have had it replaced twice. 10/10 would Mirena again.
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  • 15
    Rectangle - Hdleney 1 day ago u/swagshawty12 if you get the IUD and he doesn't pay for it PLEASE make him use condoms. (Or just throw the whole man away)
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  • 16
    Gesture - mamaMoonlight21 22 hr. ago When I got my IUD inserted, my husband was in the room with me, holding my hand. OP's BF sounds horrible.
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    Font - brunette_mama. 22 hr. ago That's another red flag. ↑ 19 Reply Share Prestigious-Ad-2876 22 hr. ago Money seems to hold value over any idea of family planning, which is fine for people not in relationships, but.
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    Font - Wombatseal 1 day ago Absolutely agree. We have two kids and both agree we are done. I asked him the other night if he was open to a vasectomy. There was only one right answer. He said "yes I guess, it's just scary." But completely agreed that I've done a lot of scary things to get our two children and it was his turn to take one for the team
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    Font - ari_352 1 day ago Ding ding! My husband had the same kind of response, that he was perfectly happy to get a vasectomy since we have no intent on any more children after #2 and I have already done plenty getting our children here. I didn't even have to ask and he has defended the choice to his own father and friends, telling them how it was easier for him to get snipped and that their concerns about it messing with testosterone were bs. Everyone deserves a partner who actually acts like a
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  • 20
    Font - aniyabel 23 hr. ago My husband got a vasectomy and his doctor was named I KID YOU NOT Dr Ball and we had way too many laughs about that. 53 Reply Share ari_352 23 hr. ago Dr. Ball saw a golden opportunity and took it. Lol
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  • 21
    Font - brunette_mama. 22 hr. ago This is another perfect example of men and if they value their partner's bodies. I'm so sick and tired of men who have wives that have had multiple children but they still put birth control on them when they're "done" having kids. Women are the ones who carry most of the burden of birth control, the only ones that carry the burden of pregnancy/childbirth and breastfeeding and then some men have the audacity to not want a little outpatient procedure.
    via brunette_mama
  • 22
    Human body - HighwaySetara. 1 day ago My husband had a vasectomy bc, in his words, "my abdomen had been through enough "
    via HighwaySetara

Tags

boyfriend relationship pregnancy drama scare pregnancy scare relationships girlfriend iud red flags bc pregnant red flag birth control money
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