29 Healthy Marriage Memes About the Expectations Vs. Realities of Being Married With Kids

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    Liquid - She literally just said "Ugh! Why do you have so much beard stuff??!" A sweet s Degree ********** p Tize. 7 PER MO
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    Hair - mum did you want a daughter or a son? wanted back rub
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    Photograph - My Wife: OK, hurry up while the kids are distracted Me: HU @prettyokaydads
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    Product - When my wife works in the evening and asks me about my plans while she's gone. 81 WAIT FOR YOU TO GET BACK. AND
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    Head - ME WASHING DISHES MY HUSBAND PREPARING TO WHIP ME IN THE BUTT WITH A HITCHEN TOWEL @MOMOFIANDDONE
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    Font - Cydni Beer @cydbeer My husband almost fell down the stairs and now we are in a heated debate as to whether my gasp was out of fear for his safety or excitement about a possible life insurance payout.
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    Forehead - the things my dad sends my mom Verizon <Messages (1) April 6:20 PM Tom Today 5:49 PM 94% Details Today 6:49 PM I thought you liked me O Text Message Why did you send this Send
  • 08
    Rectangle - Mom Psychologist @mompsychologist Husband: So we've basically given up. Me: On what? H: *gestures to 4yo carefully piling spaghetti on his head*: Parenting.
  • 09
    Font - No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards My wife asked me to grab her something from the hotel breakfast, and when I asked for suggestions, she said "you know what I like." I've never been so scared in my whole
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    Smile - Oh look, my wife's last nerve I want to touch it!
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    Smile - Mommy Owl @Lhlodder I'm beginning to think my husband isn't going to apologize for the way he acted in my dream last night.
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    Rectangle - him: do you know where my- me: in your 2nd drawer, to the bottom right him: how did y- me: I'm better than you not the worst mom
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    Motor vehicle - The police just showed up and took the dog!! What!!? Why?!!! Why did I marry you? Unpaid barking tickets
  • 14
    Sleeve - Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life. your ecards someecards.com
  • 15
    Product - What's something you do that you'd never tell your SO/spouse about ? #admin 137 Comments Like Comment When I'm at the checkout in Target or Walmart I sometimes buy gift cards to restaurants that I love and thennn when I want to go out to eat and hubby says we need to save money I'm like "waiiiiiiit a second! I thinkkkk I have a gift card from last Christmas we haven't used yet!!!!" I search in my pocketbook like I am really not sure....and then...waaaaa laaaa! There it is!!! Off to the
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    Extinction - When you're in the shower and your wife walks in, so you gotta remind her of the goods wwww
  • 17
    Primate - When she did her hair and makeup and spent $120.89 on lingerie to see me stand at the end of the bed like...
  • 18
    Font - No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards Watching "Back to the Future II" with 14yo, and he said "2015?! That's not the future. That was 6 years ago!" I just sat there, quietly, almost like I was at my own funeral, because I'd somehow outlived the future of my own childhood, and somehow I'm not already dead.
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    Forehead - When you tell your kids it's bedtime and all of the sudden they're hungry, thirsty, and need to pee @DadPatrol [stares motherfuckerly]
  • 20
    Eye - The real reason they discourage MRIs during pregnancy is because then people would realise they're incubating nightmare demons and would be rightfully terrified i bless the rains down in castamere @Chinchillazilla I hate this SO MUCH but I can't look away
  • 21
    Font - Them: what's it like to parent a toddler? Me: imagine if sitting down and silence were illegal
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    Font - Dad and Buried @DadandBuried When you have more than one kid, you think the oldest will become both playmate and protector, but instead he turns into a power-mad dictator who rules his subjects with an iron fist.
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    Organism - Derek Simpson @dereksimpson You're just going to have to trust me that I love my kids...I can't keep up with y'all's made up holidays. 11:24 PM 9/27/21 Twitter for iPad .
  • 24
    Font - He pressed her up against the wall. She could feel his jorts bulging as he untucked his "World's Best Dad" t-shirt. She pushed him backwards onto the bed and he began to undress. "No." she said, "The New Balance 624s stay on." 49 Like Comment 15 Comments Send "I'm so hot" she proclaimed. "Hi hot, I'm dad" he whispered.
  • 25
    Rectangle - IF YOUR MOMMA IS 29-38 KNOW THIS, DON'T TEST HER. MASTER P, THREE 6 MAFIA, AND DMX RAISED HER AND SHE AIN'T NEVA SCURRED.
  • 26
    Food - OPEN TEAR HERE Gerber 41 Gerber 2nd Baby's first heart attack! Ghost Peppers Foods NET WT/PESO NETO 4 OZ (113g)
  • 27
    Font - THE DAD The Dad @thedad My wife has like 20% of a conversation in her head before she decides to bring me into it. We can be driving in silence and she'll just be like "and then we'll pick the kids up and go straight from there."
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    White - 3:40 huffpost.com/entry/hilarious-pr 22 1:18 PM Jan 26, 2016 525 Sam @SufficientCharm f 182 people are Tweeting a... 5 Stages of Pregnancy: 1: Crying 847 2: Peeing 3: Crying because you peed 4: Peeing because you're crying 5: The toilet is your home now 11:25 AM. Apr 24, 2017 331 people are Tweeting a... A Bearer Of Dad News @HomeWithPeanut O I was reading to my kids today and in the story, there was a pregnant woman 99% :
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    Font - 6:54 85° Z My mom as a mom: You get what you get, deal with it. 437% My mom as a grandma: Would you like your grilled cheese cut into stars or hearts?

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