‘You probably have some quiet neighbors then’: Top Dad Jokes of the Year

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    r/dadjokes Posted by u/Samyboy06 19 hours ago Wife didn't appreciate my Dad joke, but I thought y'all might We were driving through a small town on a road trip and I mentioned I might enjoy living this far away from everything. A little down the road we saw a house for sale.
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    Me: Oh look a house for sale Wife: It's right next to the cemetery Me: Probably have some quiet neighbors then She just kinda sighed, but I crack myself up
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/englishtube 7 days ago What weighs more, a gallon of water, or a gallon of butane? A gallon of water. Butane is a lighter fluid.
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    r/dadjokes Posted by u/Canadian BallMapper 6 days ago . My wife told me to put ketchup on the shopping list... But now I can't see anything.
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/AnimatorNr1 5 days ago My wife said that I ruined her birthday.. But I didn't even know it was her birthday.
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    r/dadjokes · Posted by u/andersonfmly 4 days ago Walking home late last night I passed a slice of apple pie, a hot fudge sundae, and a lemon cheesecake. I thought to myself... The streets are strangely desserted tonight.
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/UrbanCyclerPT 6 days ago My wife is mad at me because of the way I keep introducing her I always refer to her as my «ex-girlfriend>>
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/TheQuietKid22 2 days ago Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side.
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    r/dadjokes Posted by u/Nerobrine86 8 days ago What's the worst thing to hear your surgeon say during the operation? Literally anything.
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/Drahcireid 18 days ago I asked a German girl for her number and I'm still waiting for the rest of the digits. So far, all I have is "nine".
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/LFA2023 13 days ago "I just came across my wife's Tinder profile and I'm so angry about her lies. She is not "fun to be around"
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    r/dadjokes · Posted by u/iamfondofpigs 11 days ago My wife is pregnant. I asked her whether she wanted any dinner. She replied: "No thanks, I gestate."
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    r/dadjokes · Posted by u/CuriouGeorg 23 days ago A carnival worker hit us with a dad joke. I laughed, My kid groaned. A local pop up carnival came through town so the family went when they weren't that busy. My 13 year old were coming up to a ride, when the worker told my son that he would let him on for free if he could answer a question. Oh cool! What's
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    the question? "What is Iron Man's favorite ride?" As my son and I looked upward searching for inspiration, the worker yelled out: "The FERROUS Wheel!"
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    My son's head dropped to the floor and I laughed. The worker went ahead and let my kid on for free, probably due to emotional damage. I still had to pay my tickets though....Worth it.
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/spochreddit 10 days ago Daughter texted me this in the morning. "I can't wake up this morning. Feel like a bicycle". Two tired.
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/diggitygiggitysee 10 days ago What did Jay-Z call his wife before they were married? Feyonce.
  • 18
    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/SpaceBar0873 25 days ago My wife told me to stop saying country puns. I said Norway.
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    r/dadjokes Posted by u/EndersGame_Reviewer 26 days ago A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, "Yes, of course. That's 20 cows."
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    r/dadjokes. Posted by u/EndersGame_Reviewer 5 days ago What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly? Stationary.
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    r/dadjokes · Posted by u/wheezy360 9 months ago I just had quite possibly the best dad joke of my dadding career I was going through the Starbucks drive through and had the best on-the-spot dad joke moment with the guy taking my order.
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    Starbucks Guy: Can I get a name for the order? Me: It's Mike. SG: Hey, the last guy who came through here was also Mike. Me: Yeah, I know. We're all connected together. You know how we communicate?
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    SG: ... Me: Through microwaves. Edit: I hear all you people talking about microphones. I'm not talking about microwave ovens. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microwave

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