‘She did not throw us a pizza party’: 30+ Professors whose students wrote funny reviews about them

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    Professors of Reddit, what's the funniest thing a student has said about you on ratemyprofessor.com?
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    doughaway7562. Not a professor, but there's this work of art one student posted on koofers: [professor]'s eyebrows suit the man with a perfection rarely found in nature. They bristle from his forehead with the stubborn arrogance of a bougainvillea hedgerow, defying all attempts to question their inexorable will. Perched on his face
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    like a pair of unusually hairy caterpillars engaged in a passionate kiss, they meet at an angle only slightly less obtuse than the man who wears them.
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    tic-tac-cat Not a prof, but this is one of my favourite reviews of my biology professor: "I used to like bio, not anymore. I could have cured cancer, but because of [prof's name], we'll never know. Solidified my major in chemistry."
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    tke1078 Been teaching for 3 years now, had some decent ones but my best was "Your sarcasm can sometimes make you seem like an ....but that's okay, we first." were
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    mmedimanche One semester I helped an ancient professor with some of her research. She was one of the most disorganized people I've ever met. One of her reviews nails it: "I am pretty sure that she was unaware that she is a professor. For that matter, I think she was unaware that she lives in the state of Wisconsin."
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    AKUtahrd One of my professors in air traffic control school was especially strict and ran the simulator for the air traffic control tower. A student wrote in a review, "sometimes when he is running the simulator, I wonder who is running ||
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    Tupptupp_XD I know a high school teacher who tells all of his students to rate him on ratemyteacher, but say something 'squiddy'. He has tons of reviews like "Great class but I think I saw a tentacle hanging from his desk drawer one day..."
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    b8le TA in Calc. Pretty much broke down to 3 different types - good reviews, bad because the class was 'too hard' or them complaining about my handwriting. Did have one memorable one something like this:
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    'Does a great job teaching, I am not a math major and did well enough in his class. BUT he takes off his wedding ring before class, I'm sure in hopes that he can pick up students. I saw the tanline on his finger.' Not married, never have been, and have never worn a ring of any kind.
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    Not me, but one of my writing professors would always share her favorite review she'd ever been given. "She's a good professor but I'd be able to focus more if she didn't look like a hobbit."
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    pmay My dad is a professor and is very proud of his ratemyprofessor reviews, his personal favorite that he brags about regularly includes the phrase "sometimes I feel like biting him"
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    lejetwerkengwa My Calc 3 professor told us on the last day about some of the stuff he has read about himself. The one I remember him talking about most was: "He is very oddly shaped and flails his arms about to try and depict 3D shapes" His response was: "Even though I do flail my arms, I believe I am not oddly shaped. Just look at me...this is 100% math bod right here".
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    MisterVertigo7 I just looked up my best friend who is a college professor. One review included this: "He's pretty attractive if you are attracted to beards and Banana Republic." I read that and just about lost it! He has a Chili pepper too, so I guess students think he's pretty hot.
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    stuchapin Mr.X is a beautiful and intelligent human being who inspires all those around him to achieve greatness. There is nothing that compares to the opportunity one has to bask in his magnificent glory. That being said the sudden changes in facial hair can be somewhat unsettling.
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    PM_ME_DUCK_FACTS Not a professor, but as a TA we get semester reviews. I had a student who didn't show up once. On the 'anonymous' review, one student said, "I know I'm not passing this class, it's not PM_ME_DUCK_FACT's fault. My parents wanted me to be a doctor and are paying for my school so I had to 'try' their way. Since that didn't work out, now I can take classes I actually want."
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    yourhairisonlyfornow My boyfriend had a review that complained about his obsession with the Romans. He teaches Classics.
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    brian010515 We were getting a new teacher for electronic engineering so naturally I looked him up on ratemyteacher and I saw these: More like a permanent substitute than a teacher He has the IQ of room temperature (and yes, we use celsius like the rest of the world except the freedom nation)
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    Metallic52 A colleague of mine, currently one of the best dancers in the country, had a student from a beginning class write, "For a national champion he sure doesn't dance like one."
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    + [deleted] I'm not a teacher but I saw a review going along the lines of ".. THE ONLY THING THAT DESERVES DEGREES IN YOUR CLASSROOM ARE THE PROTRACTORS..."
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    Mw Photovoltaic Not a professor yet, just a TA EVERY single TA is the hardest grader ever. My students liked that I baked cookies though. That's the only positive review I got. It was either no response or "GREAT COOKIES!"
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    ✪ [deleted] Not me, but one of my favorite professors at my university has "Prof [So-and-so] is like the Luna Lovegood of Science."
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    cromonolith I teach calculus at a large university. One of my RMP comments is "Great prof. Sassy af though." I was pleased.
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    [deleted] My professor, in an attempt to win a contest with one of his buddies, ask that everyone leave him a rating on RMP, with the condition that he doesn't care what they write as long as they say he's super hot (like a fiery chili or whatever)
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    Ut_Prosim 7 yr. ago My dad was a prof and his best was from a guy who had missing his final exam. The guy said he walked into my dad's office 40 minutes after the exam ended and pleaded for a chance to take it anyway. Instead of bullshitting an excuse, he decided to be honest and admit he slept through it.
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    Apparently my dad laughed at him, called him and idiot, then let him take it anyway, saying "ahh, you remind me of my son..." That's right guy, if I hadn't been such a f up, you would have failed that class. You're welcome!
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    Ekleo My dad was a prof for a number of years for a masters level class. One review was just "take <Ekleo's dad's> class at your own peril." He also got a chilli pepper and being an upper division computer engineering class it was primarily guys so that was interesting.
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    mahou_kid My favorite professor was my Intro to Geology professor. He was an old man who had been a geologist for over 30 years. Saying he loved rocks was an understatement. Here are two real reviews from his RMP. "Jim is clearly passionate about two things: Rocks, and teaching people about rocks!"
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    "Leave your cell phone in your car. Don't show up late. And be prepared to get rocked." Another student goes on to talk about how he has a major man crush on the prof. and countless others talk about how much he ROCKS.
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    waterRK9 My history teacher. "Asked her why the Cold War was called the Cold War. She said it was "because Russia was cold". "
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    jusjerm Coach Jusjerm is oddly knowledgeable about Harry Potter, and has strong opinions on 90's rap
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    melis6586 I was referred to as an "overlord." For reference, I'm a nerdy, introverted, soft spoken, math professor. So I'm more proud of this than anything.
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    BrandNewSidewalk "Boring. You will be able to learn, but that's all you will be able to do." Uhhh... Not sure what you were expecting man, a party, parade?
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    kii_los. "Mr... is so boring; your pillow will need a pillow!"
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    [deleted] This is from an actual written review and not ratemyprofessor.com, but one of my students wrote "she did not throw us a pizza party" under things they didn't like about me.

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