Ex-Wife Enforces Petty Divorce Rule, Husband Gets Even With Malicious Compliance, Both Get Roasted Online

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    Ex won't follow divorce rule that she wrote S OC Ex (38f, who is my kids mom) really wanted right of first refusal in divorce agreement so she could get extra time with kids if I (39m)
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    couldn't watch them. Which is reasonable. But she also wanted it specified that only grandparents and aunt's and uncles could watch the kids if she passed on the right of first refusal. She wouldn't admit it, but my lawyer suspected the reason she wanted to only allow those specific people was to exclude any romantic partner of mine from babysitting ever. The
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    kids' parents would always get first dibs, though, so there was no good reason for that bit of it and honestly a long term partner is probably going to be better for the kids as a babysitter than my family who is hours away and some of them aren't the most trustworthy. I agreed to it in the final agreement under the condition that I get a make up date any time she uses the right of first refusal (to avoid giving her the incentive to just say no to every date swap).
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    So fast forward to this weekend and I ask if she wants the kids under right of first refusal and she says yes, but that she -won't- give me a make up overnight. Because the right of first refusal requires a make-up, I tell her that this counts as rejecting her right of first refusal. She gets mad and says I should give her the kids anyway.
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    So I say I need to follow the -exact- wording of the divorce agreement, and it says only grandparents and aunts and uncles can watch the kids (she didn't put parents in there), so I'm not even legally allowed to let her watch the kids if she's not going to follow the right of first refusal agreement. Oh that felt sweet to use that stupid rule she created against her attempt to break the agreement. She was mad, but she finally agreed to a make up overnight in the end, which is the way it should h
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    Edit: I think it's worth adding that I do believe the end state here was best for the kids, which is the goal. Keeping the placement days 50/50 let's the kids keep seeing each parent as much as they can, and they want to see both parents as much as they can. It promotes parental equality from everyone's view. She's generally a good mom to the kids, I'm a good dad, no real concerns there. But she's willing to try to break the divorce agreement so that she can get more time with the kids by taking
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    anniearrow 3 days ago Why do parents do stupid things that will hurt their children? Like ridiculous rules about when the non-custodial parent can see their children? I don't have kids, but correct me if I'm wrong, doesn't it take two to make a child? 1.7k Reply Share
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    Aggravating Class_17. 3 days ago None of this makes any sense to me lol 313 Reply Share
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    bobthemundane 3 days ago You and a friend go in for season tickets to sports. You split the games evenly. As part of the deal, you state that if one of you can't make the game, the other gets first dibs on unused tickets, and in the case that they claim dibs, they trade another game so you still get the same amount of games.
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    But the friend also doesn't want ransoms in their seats. So puts another rule on that if they don't trade tickets for games, then the tickets can only be given to a certain set of friends.
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    So, now comes the event. You have a wedding to go to, and can't make one of your games. You tell your friend you can't make it. He says he will take the ticket. You state ok, what tickets are you going to give me? As per the agreement? He looks and says none. I just want those tickets. You go no, I will just give it to friends then. They still state just give it to me. But you point out that they are not on the list of friends you can give tickets to. If your friend really wants the tickets, the
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    TheThistle123 . 3 days ago It's important to love your kids more than you hate your ex. 163 Reply Share
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    HugSized 3 days ago These poor kids 4 133 Reply Share
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    Newfur 3 days ago HEARTWARMING: This reddit poster is more effective than his ex-wife is at using their children as pawns for vindictive purposes!
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    Intheboxalready. 3 days ago I get that it felt good, but "sticking it to" the ex, just because it feels good is probably going to cause more headaches in the long run. Always make decisions based on what is best for the kids. Sometimes it takes being the bigger person and help the ex, as it might spark a better parenting relationship which will make things easier for you in the long run.
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    featherfriendfollowr OP. 3 days ago I totally agree with your point that "sticking it to" the ex just to feel good is bad for everyone. I don't think anyone should do that. I just wanted us to keep to the agreement and keep days even, as I really do think that's best for the kids and the adults too. The fact that it was invoking her own rule that stopped her from breaking the agreement is where I got some satisfaction, I'll admit.

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