Memebase

‘I can’t help but feel guilty for breaking the tradition’: Parents discuss the burden of passing down the ‘family’ name

Are you 'you' or are you just the third or fourth of that first matriarch or patriarch of your family who started this vain "tradition?" 

Posted by Elna McHilderson
Advertisement

  • One of the most fun parts when you are expecting, is coming up with a name for your child. Are you going to go more traditional or find a quirky more unique name for the little guy? Are you going with a more feminine, masculine, or ambiguous name? When you finally land on a name both you and your partner love, it feels like it was always meant to be. However, sometimes, so-called “family traditions” can run this fun part of expecting. 

    Take user, Tauter11_96 on Reddit. He recently had a baby boy and named him Ezra, to the chagrin of his family. He comes from a line of “Williams," and though he gave his child “William” as his middle name, his family still acts disappointed. Some family members won't even say the baby's name and go about it by calling him all kinds of nicknames or even just “the child.” The parents love the name Ezra and just wanted to give their child the most stress-free life with no family pressure. He is stuck between feeling confident in his decision for his child, but also feeling like a bad family member. What would you do? 

    Tauter11_96 sounds like a good father to us. Unlike this father who basically shunned his daughter for wanting to apply to a community college over a state college... Like tf??

  • Advertisement
  • 1
    "All I really want is for him to feel like he's his own person when he grows up, to not feel like there is some kind of burden on him to live up to any expectations we might have for him like I suppose I've always felt." (57 Un
    Via NegativeSpace
  • 2
    AITA for refusing to name my son after me? My family have a tradition going back six generations in which the first-born son is named William. My father and I go by our middle names to avoid confusion, whilst my grandfather is known as Bill. It's not that I don't like tradition, it's just that my middle name, James, is the name I've always been known as and I always hated being made fun of when I was younger, especially at school when a new teacher would inevitably call out my actual first name
    Via Tauter11_96
  • 3
    Now I am an adult, I know that if I wanted to, I could legally change my name by deed poll, but I guess I've just got used to the inconvenience, and at this stage of my life, it's more of a conversation starter if anything else. I also understand that of all of the things to be made fun of when younger, it's pretty low down on the list and some people would just say I'm being petty. Anyway, I have recently become a father to a beautiful baby boy and to my family's horror, we have named him Ezra,
    Via Tauter11_96
  • Advertisement
  • 4
    All I really want for Ezra is for him to feel like he's his own person when he grows up, to not feel like there is some kind of burden on him to live up to any expectations we might have for him like I suppose I've always felt somewhat, and to feel comfortable knowing that any decisions he makes, me and his mum will always support him. This is what makes me stand by our decision, but I can't help but feel guilt for breaking the tradition, and that there is now a slight rift between me and my fam
    Via Tauter11_96
  • 5
    celticmusebooks. 5h ago SIL's husbands family did this when they didn't use the name MIL wanted. MIL went a step further in "making up" a nickname based on her chosen name and encouraged that side of the family to only use that name. SIL shut that down pretty fast. EVERY time MIL or FIL called him the name SIL would get a concerned look on her face and adress them speaking slowly like to a child and loudly like addressing a person with poor hearing and say. "Mom, that's "Joseph" remember? We've
    Via celticmusebooks
  • 6
    Crafty-Gardener. 6h ago Enthusiast [6] Yes, this. Stand your ground OP the naming of the baby is between the two parents, no one else. Its got bugger all to do with your family. If they don't like it tough. If they can't respect the name and your wife choose and respect Ezra as his own person then they stop seeing little baby Ezra. 342 Reply ↑ Share Shazza_Mc_ShazzaFace . 6h ago Partassipant [2] I like you NTA OP, and really think about the above suggestions! 472 Reply Share ⠀
    Via Crafty-Gardener
  • Advertisement
  • 7
    ObligationNo2288 • 5h ago I would remind anyone refusing to use his name, as a warning. There are exceptions like the baby, little man etc. most people after the warning will hopefully comply. For the one who refuse, let the chips fall. Good luck and Ezra is a beautiful name. ↑ 64 ↓ Reply seanwdragon1983 • 4h ago Partassipant [1] Share Everyone has great advice, but you can't go wrong with an air horn when they call your baby the wrong name. 32 Reply Share ...
    Via ObligationNo2288
  • 8
    Extension_Sun_377 4h ago . NTA. Just tell them you're starting a new tradition of William as a middle name - after all, someone started this 'tradition' and I bet it wasn't acknowledged as one until the 3rd William anyway. If they don't like it, they don't get to see him. ↑ 29 + More replies Seconded 23 ↓ Reply ↑ Share DutchJediKnight. 6h ago Reply ↑ Share ...
    Via Extension_Sun_377
  • 9
    Marnnirk 4h ago They are manipulating you and punishing you because you didn't fall in line with what they want. Follow the advice above. If they can't acknowledge and use his name, they don't get access to "the child". 23 ↓ Reply Share
    Via Marnnick
  • Advertisement
  • 10
    Judgmental_puffer • 6h ago NTA. You and your partner can name your children whatever you like. You did not start this tradition and had no say in it so your family has no say in whether you'd like it going or not. I actually love that you still kept the tradition by giving William as middle nam. That should be plenty enough.... Please don't feel like the AH for naming your child... 1.4K Reply Share
    Via Judgemental_puffer
  • 11
    TunaMarie16 6h ago Definitely NTA. And while the subject is of his name and the family's reaction to breaking tradition, let's not forget there's so much more to be had between baby Ezra and his family. Perhaps it would be beneficial to remind them that although you acknowledge their disappointment in his name, their energy should be put into the joy of a new baby, getting to know him, spending time with him, loving him, teaching him, bonding with him. In the big picture, the relationships are w
    Via TunaMarie16
  • 12
    kraemoon 4h ago Don't even say mother, that's giving her some semblance of respect. Call her 'old lady' and him 'old man.' If they complain that they don't like it, tell them how they treat you dictates how you treat them. ↑ 39 ↓ Reply beewoopwoop. 6h ago yea!! please OP do it!! and we demand an update once you do !! NTA ↑ 21 ↓ Reply Senior_Egg_3496 • 5h ago . Share Reply ↑ Share Or "the loser" or "the heifer", just so they know how you feel about mis-naming your baby. ↑ 19 ↓ ... ↑ Share
    Via kraemoon
  • Advertisement
  • 13
    FUBAR_1980. 6h ago NTA. I feel for you, we have something similar in my husbands family. The men all have the same middle name. Well I sucked it up for my first son but when my second was born, I wanted a middle name from my side of the family. My FIL went nuts and said son 2 wasn't his real grandson as he didn't have the name. I told him he was being ridiculous and to suck it up. He did get over it eventually. He was extremely old fashioned and came from "old" money. Reply 215 Share Osteojo 5h
    Via FUBAR_1980

Stay entertained and up to date by following us on Facebook and Instagram!

Tags

family names Babies baby baby names family tradition baby names naming baby family baby names traditions family traditions breaking tradition new parents family traditional baby names parents

Next on Memebase

Scroll down for the next article

Comments

Advertisement

Hot Today

26 Hilarious Construction Worker Memes to Brighten Up Your 4am Weekend Wake-up Call (April 27, 2024) 1
30+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (April 27, 2024) 2
23 Best Parenting Memes of the Week for Witty Moms and Dads Laughing and Parenting the Best They Can (April 27, 2024) 3
A Chuckle Barn Full of the Funniest Memes for the Silliest Goose on the Farm 4
'Cut the umbilical cord already': Fed up fiancée calls off wedding after overbearing mother-in-law makes excuses to postpone on 4 different occasions 5
20 Coffee Memes for Caffeine Consumers Who Need Their Brown Liquid 6
26 Hilarious Construction Worker Memes to Brighten Up Your 4am Weekend Wake-up Call (April 27, 2024) 1
27 Introvert Memes for Grateful Loners Happy to Stay in Their Lane (April 26, 2024) 2
20 Coffee Memes for Caffeine Consumers Who Need Their Brown Liquid 3
A Potshot of Random Memes and Posts 4
A Chuckle Barn Full of the Funniest Memes for the Silliest Goose on the Farm 5
34 Memes for When You Need to Lock In 6

Follow The Laughs

Terms | Privacy | Security | DMCA Policy
Advertisement