Internet sides with woman who chooses going to a concert over her best friend's wedding, bride is furious: '[She] knew I booked tickets on that date'

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    r/AmltheAsshole 20 hr. ago Old_Explanation6923 AITA for choosing a concert over my best friend's wedding?
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    My (26f) best friend (26f) Jessy is getting married on July 13th in Albania. We both live in Albania. The issue is that on July 13th my fiancé and I have booked tickets for the Eras tour in Milan almost 1
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    year in advance or else they'd sell out. We also had to book hotels, flights etc because we'll stay there for 4 days. Jessy knew that I've booked tickets on that date. She hadn't booked
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    her wedding yet. She got engaged in November and booked her wedding date last month. She had told everyone she'd get married during summer but she never said the exact date up to this point when many people kept asking.
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    her so they can know their plans. I booked the tickets this past summer when the tour dates were announced. When she told me the date I told her she can't be serious. She was
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    like why? I reminded her I have the concert and the trip on those dates. And she told me ok? Then cancel it obviously? I told her sorry I can't. I can't cancel the hotel, plane tickets and concert tickets. I'll have to pay a high fee to cancel
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    all that and I don't think I can even cancel the concert tickets. I reminded her it's something I've planned a year in advance and she knew. And she straight up told me that yes she knew but she didn't care because as a friend she'd
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    expect me to do the right thing and drop everything for her wedding. I told her I'm not cancelling my plans for something you knew a year in advance I'd do.
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    She accused me of being ta basically for putting a trip and a concert over her wedding. She won't speak to me now unless I send her proof that I'm cancelling everything to attend her wedding.
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    RecedingQuasar • 20h ago Aficionado [11] NTA. Obviously. Not sure what to add... Is anyone other than her disagreeing with you?
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    Rebel_in_a_t... • • 22h ago ⚫ Edited 22h ago NTA. the truth is rather ironic - by saying 'she didn't care because as a friend she'd expect me to do the right thing and drop everything for her wedding' she's saying she doesn't care about what you want, your plans, or your finances, and not only wouldn't drop plans for something important to you, she wouldn't even consider them. Basically, she doesn't care about you.
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    Did she do it on purpose as a power move? Has she shown this sort of controlling or 'prove your friendship to me' behaviour before? I'm so sorry that's extremely poor - form on her part. Go to your concert and have a blast. There may well be
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    other people she hasn't considered, and you won't be the only one she gets upset at if this is the type of attitude she has for her bf. Even if you did go, you'd resent it, she'd sense that, and it could spoil the day anyway and / or be held over you.
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    It's not just about you either - she's trying to ruin this for your fiance. Remember he's affected by this too, so you're not having to handle this based solely on your own commitments and feelings. Weddings aren't a golden ticket for servitude and glorification from everyone around you. She's the AH.
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    • CareerDifficult8405 22h ago NTA, Sounds like she is jealous of you attending the concert. She easily could've asked you in advance or made a plan but didn't. Would this be a concert you two would go to together if your finance wasn't going?
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    fervourfox • 22h ago . Unfortunately weddings are often used as ways for friends to "test" their - friends' undying loyalty. Fortunately, it exposes self-centered narcissists. While sad, it's best for you in the long run. Enjoy your trip. You're not missing anything by not attending the wedding. If anything, she did you a favor by exposing her lack of consideration for others. And hey, you can always attend her next wedding after her soon-to-be husband figures this out.
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    StonewallBrigade21 • 22h ago Supreme Court Just- [119] "she straight up told me that yes she knew but she didn't care because as a friend she'd expect me to do the right thing and drop everything for her wedding." "She won't speak to me now unless I send her proof that I'm cancelling everything to attend her wedding." NTA, she is for her attitude. Go to the concert and don't feel bad about it (just like she doesn't care).
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    hopingtothrive • 22h ago Aficionado [16] I have booked tickets for the Eras tour in Milan almost 1 year in advance Go and enjoy!! A missing guest will not affect her wedding unless it's the groom! A wedding is a celebration of a couple's love for each other. Really doesn't have anything to do with who comes to watch the show. NTA
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    freefaall • 22h ago Partassipant [2] NTA. You're not choosing a concert over her wedding. You planned an international trip with your partner a year ago, and your friend knew about it. She did it on purpose. It's jealousy.
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    glimmerseeker . 22h ago Aficionado [13] Jessy needs to realize that while her wedding is the most important thing right now to HER, it's not the most important thing for everyone else. You had plans you can't change. If she wants to end a friendship because you won't be at her wedding, that's on her. You're NTA here.

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