‘People don’t put in the work’: Women Open Up About the Trials and Tribulations of Modern Dating

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
May 23, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

Dating in the modern world has opened up Pandora's box of new problems that never existed before. New feelings, new ways to reject, nullify, denigrate, and sabotage love and the dating world. With a full menu of faces to scroll through at the tip of your fingers, the whole realm of dating has turned on its back. Back in the day, a man had to come up to a woman, have the confidence to talk, charm, and flirt with her in the hope to get a phone number. These days, there's a detachment between two people through the face of the phone. And while a man is talking to one girl, he's easily talking to 100 other women. 

The sickness that comes from the obsession of scrolling and texting is bizarre. Likely nothing will happen, or that someone will get lucky. These are the best case scenarios most of the time. Women in the world of modern dating discuss cons behind what apps create. Get some insight from the internet through this interesting Reddit thread.

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  • 01
    18 r/AskReddit ⚫ 19 hr. ag • TheGame2526 18 What worries you about modern dating?
    via u/TheGame2526
  • 02
    Infamous-Platfor... • 18h ago Being able to swipe through a veritable menu of people makes the greener grass temptation that much stronger. I think it makes people less likely to cherish what they have.
    via u/Infamous-Platform
  • 03
    Pizza Saucy 17h ago Ghosting can really eat away at your self esteem. I had a great conversation for a few days and we agreed to a simple place at a pizza shop. When I confirmed the day of they unmatched and never responded. I felt humiliated just sitting in the parking lot.
    via u/Pizza Saucy
  • 04
    Lilli_Puff •16h ago I've noticed a lot of people ditching their relationships when things get a bit rough because they think there's someone better out there. It seems more prevalent now than ever before in my life. I'm not sure if it's because of so many options due to
    via u/Lilli_Puff
  • 05
    dating apps/websites or social media comparing but something is off in this department.
    via u/Lilli_Puff
  • 06
    Seraph6496 16h ago I can't figure out how to meet anyone anymore. Apps or IRL.
    via u/Seraph6496
  • 07
    Every time I go out, whether it's to a bar or the like, or an event, I tell myself if I see someone who looks interesting and isn't part of a group, I'll go up and try to have a chat. There's never anyone not part of a group. I feel like I'm the only person who does things by myself now. And inserting
    via u/Seraph6496
  • 08
    myself into a group as a stranger is just a move As for apps, on the rare occasion I match with someone they just don't reply. Why even "like" me if you're not going to reply to my message
    via u/Seraph6496
  • 09
    Next-Food2688 . 18h ago Insincerity in actions and words. (If you say it and don't mean it or don't follow through) Non permanence view of the long term consequences of the relationship. (Some fragment of the relationship has life long implications mentally or physically).
    via u/Next-Food2688
  • 10
    Replaceability. The next relationship will be better than this one view.
    via u/Next-Food2688
  • 11
    AnonPianoPlayer... • 16h ago No one wants to put in effort into relationships and work through difficulties. If it gets hard they're gone. I don't see how relationships can be truly long term anymore
    via u/AnonPianoPlayer
  • 12
    toadsking ⚫18h ago The increasing tendency to change partners very often
    via u/toadsking
  • 13
    W2ttsy 15h ago Gotta be perfect on day one. No chance to make mistakes or take missteps or spend time learning about someone or allowing yourself to be vulnerable.
    via u/W2ttsy
  • 14
    Nope. One flat conversation one bad restaurant pick, bad in bed the first time and replaced by one of the many in the queue waiting for their turn. sometimes you can be dropped for one late text message response.
    via u/W2ttsy
  • 15
    Traditional_Food... • 18h ago That I'm going to fall for someone who secretly longs for someone else (an ex, for example)
    via u/Traditional_Food
  • 16
    L... 16h ago ⚫ Edited 12h ago • The lack of empathy and how for some people is so easy to lie and pretend they want a serious relationship when they just want Don't make me waste my time, just ask for what you want and then I can decide if I actually want.
    via u/Lost_Day_Dreamer
  • 17
    Alternative_Door... • 17h ago I find it harder and harder to make genuine connections with people. It's hard to meet new people without relying on the internet, but dating apps and Reddit make it so easy for people to just disappear the moment they feel like it. I try.
    via u/Alternative_Door
  • 18
    not to judge people for ghosting because you never know what someone is going through at any given. time, but it makes trusting people very difficult.
    via u/Alternative_Door
  • 19
    Realistic_Coconut... • 15h ago A lot of people are using others for when something better comes along.
    via u/Realistic_Coconut
  • 20
    Bimblelina 16h ago • Apps are like looking through a human catalogue. Can't do it.
    via u/Bimblelina
  • 21
    I can't tell if someone is an attractive person until I meet them and people write what they think other people want to hear on their profiles.
    via u/Bimblelina
  • 22
    It's not in the business interests for dating apps to be too successful, or they'd run out of clients. So they've normalised hook-up and situationships as the default behaviour of users.
    via u/Bimblelina
  • 23
    Busy Emergency... • 19h ago That it has become polarized. A lot of (if you're not with me you're against me) thought processes in modern women and men.
    via u/Busy Emergency

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tinder modern dating hinge relationships advice lol couples love dating apps reddit thread Reddit funny women dating
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