Woman Cancels Beach Vacation With Boyfriend After Discovering He’s Been on Grindr, Exposing More Secrets of His Past

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Jul 22, 2024 12:00 PM EDT

There's nothing worse than finding out your partner was hiding something from you. Time and place are everything, and of course, during a romantic beach getaway, is when this woman stumbles upon her boyfriend's hidden photos on his phone. Actually, hidden is a strong word; she says she went to his screenshots (to find the restaurant they were going to), and they were all right there. So as uncouth as it sounds, if you're going to lie and scheme, at least know how to keep a secret. 

This poor woman was on a vacation with her boyfriend when she stumbled upon these questionable photos. After confronting him about it, he initially tries to keep his secret, but eventually succumbs to his truth. She buys him a ticket back home, and proceeds to call his mom. After this phone call, she learns about his patterned infidelity, that he was seeing his ex while he was with her, and that the Grindr issue isn't the first time it's coming up. But read the full story for yourself for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01
    r/relationship_advice ⚫ LiaLovesLillies I (22f) found my boyfriend (28m) of two years on Grindr. How can I live a normal life after this?
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 02
    It was horrible. We had just arrived on my beach house where we were going to spend the week whole week, we were looking a for a good pizza place and I screenshoted my favorites. I opened his gallery to choose the pizza and found various pictures of him nude and other men as
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 03
    well. When I confronted him about it he said he just traded pictures for an adventure, and he never encountered those men, but honestly I couldn't trust him. If he wanted to only trade pictures he would do it online, those apps are meant to find people near you. I can't trust him.
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 04
    And The worst part is yet to come. He admitted he lied and his last relationship ended for similar reasons, so I bought a bus ticket for him back home, while he was out of his way I called his mom because I needed to know if he
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 05
    went out with anyone in may (when we were not seeing each other bc of a medical congress | went to). I discovered he also lied about his last relationship. The first time he hit on me was 2022, and he was still with his girlfriend (he said he spent 2 years with her, it was actually 4.5 years). I
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 06
    discovered the whole situation was so insane she dropped out of college to not see him anymore (I didn't even know she studied in the same college as him, apparently they got in together). Also, he had told me before of a sexual encounter he had in mid 2021, therefore, he accidentally
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 07
    admitted having an affair with his last girlfriend.
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 08
    Dude I'm so in utter disbelief, he had never done anything to make me feel even slightly suspicious. I can't trust anyone anymore, I don't know what to do. Can anyone redirect me to a support group? Or a hotline? Anything for resources, I really need help at this moment. I feel so humiliated,
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 09
    so betrayed, I don't know what to do. Yes we already broke up.
    via u/LiaLovesLillies
  • 10
    accj30 18h ago Op was right to break up with her (ex) boyfriend. I would no longer trust this liar in a conventional relationship, much less in a dom/sub relationship.
    via u/accj30
  • 11
    MasterKameham... • 18h ago How been only trading pictures with MEN would be any better? It's cliche, but you dodged a bullet.
    via u/MasterKameham
  • 12
    Takeabreak128 • 18h ago I can't believe you had to buy a 28 year old a bus ticket!
    via u/Takeabreak128
  • 13
    throwaway24677... 17h ago I was with my ex husband. for almost 20 years and married for 15 with 2 kids. We built a great life that got ripped out from under my last year when I found out he was cheating on me with
    via u/throwaway24677
  • 14
    he was cheating on me with lots of men. Very traumatic for me and has taken lots of healing. Be happy you found out now and not later. Move on and don't accept his excuses. Whether he's gay or Bi doesn't matter, he's not loyal and that's clear.
    via u/throwaway24677
  • 15
    Electronic_Body_... • 19h ago Just get out of that relationship.
    via u/Electronic_Body_
  • 16
    kk-777.18h ago it's so hard when you're finding out everything after the fact, the trust that you had is shattered at this point. in my opinion, the healthiest thing to do is end the relationship. it's so heartbreaking, but you can't
    via u/kk-777
  • 17
    be with someone who isn't completely honest with you. not that your partner has to tell you everything that's ever happened to them, but refusing to tell the truth or concealing things that are extremely significant (his last girlfriend, the affair, the
    via u/kk-777
  • 18
    length of the relationship, etc.) unfortunately shows that this isn't a person that you can trust. if he's done it in the past, he can most certainly do it again. i am so, so sorry for the hurt you're going through. as someone who's been in your spot
    via u/kk-777
  • 19
    before, it is the one of the most painful things. however, the best thing for YOU is to have enough self respect to leave. not saying it's not excruciating to do,
    via u/kk-777
  • 20
    but you can't be with someone who hides things like this. wishing you all the best OP
    via u/kk-777
  • 21
    Jombhi 17h ago • A practiced scumbag lied to you, don't beat yourself up too much.
    via u/Jombhi
  • 22
    Say goodbye quickly. Maybe get him out of your beach house. Got any brothers or friends he'd be afraid to freak out in front of? Call 'em in.
    via u/Jombhi
  • 23
    Individual_Water... • 18h ago There isn't going to be a support group as helpful for your situation as individual therapy. Cheating, although happens to a lot of people, is a very specific event and you need therapy tailored to you if you're unable to move.
    via u/Individual_Water
  • 24
    x3lilbopeep • 18h ago There is a rampant issue with misogyny in the gay- male community. DL men who are perfectly ok risking women's health just to have an outward appearance of straightness. And so many men who are openly out or
    via u/x3lilbopeep
  • 25
    not continue to hook up with these guys, brush it aside - it's nothing unusual. I saw in the comments that you left him, but also you should absolutely out him and warn as many others as you can. If he were cheating with other women it would
    via u/x3lilbopeep
  • 26
    be the same, and he's just going to find another woman to harm instead. Maybe his mom would be receptive to hearing the news and be able to do something to prevent this cycle again.
    via u/x3lilbopeep

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drama summer beach relationships lol couples love breakup reddit thread Reddit funny dating vacation
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