Dating Fails

9 of the Worst Date Stories We've Ever Heard

  • 1

    Who Raised This Person?

    Sky - the bathroom He went to the s a first date, and he egent Ne 2. Jtuas

    Who leaves the door open? How is that acceptable behavior? Hell, I LOCK the door when I'm home alone. Who allows this person to go on living?

  • Advertisement
  • 2

    How Could They Not Notice?

    People in nature - I got a nosebleed. It was dark, though, so we didn't notice for a good ten seconds until I pulled away and saw that I was kissing what looked like a murder victim.

    So many questions: Did he not feel the blood running out of his nose? Did she just think he was a real "moist" kisser? Could neither of them taste the blood? Did they think it was snot? Was the kiss so engrossing that they just didn't care?

  • 3

    I Can't Tell if This Is Horrible or Genius.

    Text - He told me we were going to the most expensive restaurant in town. He took me to medonalds and: didntevenbuy food, he fust offered me cookies that were in his pocket whisper

    Seriously, I'm pretty sure you were on a hidden camera prank show. Because that's amazing. Also, props to anyone who carries cookies in their pocket on a date. That's a level of preparedness I've never encountered.

  • 4

    Was He Wearing a Fedora With a Feather in It?

    Sky - "He said he had to get home before his grandma locked him out of the basement."

    Pro tip: It's cool if you live with your family. Rent can be super expensive. But, for the love of god don't tell people that on a first date. Just make something up, or say you have to get up early. It's for the best.

  • Advertisement
  • 5

    Well, at Least He Wanted to Pay

    Font - Idon't- Okay dude, Iget it."-JULIA P, 26 WORSTD Enjoy these readers' do "He tried to sell weed to someone while we were on a date so he would have enough money to take me out.-EMMA M., 22 11 "On our first date, we sat in his car, where he proceeder

    I've asked a good number of people and we all agree: it's the definitely 4th date when you tell someone you sell drugs.

  • 6

    Did His Grandma Like to Party?

    Hair - lwas there.. So was his grandma. whisper

    If his grandma was cool, then I say it's a win. But if that old bat was all "I don't like this girl, she's a hussy." Then you should probably get up out of there.

  • 7

    And the Conversation Started So Well...

    Water resources - So, I met this guy át alchib he was.cute, and we exchanged numbers. He started texting me a lot and asked me out for coffee. We made pleasant small talk stories about our childhood, sports, favorite TV shoyes etc Then he adds that he always has to fart-when he's in the car at the club, in restaurants, and every time he sits down. I don't say anything, so he follows it up, "Actually, I need to fart right now," and lets one loose in the coffee shop, which I could hear. I said I h

    Sure, eventually someone farts in front of the other. And sure, it's usually the dude who is more casual about it. But this, this man has a colon problem and should see a doctor.

  • Advertisement
  • 8

    She Had Simple Desires

    Nature - I've been on a billion, but my favorite ridiculous one was about 2 years ago she talked nonstop about her therapist, borderline personality disorder (people should learn that psychologists don't need to hear about their mental health disorders on a first date), and the boy she1oved. In the end, she only wanted to watch me pee.

    I really don't know what to say. That whole thing just makes me want to slam my head into a wall.

  • 9

    This Maybe the Worst Evening I Could Imagine

    Text - A PowerPoint Hey baby, come back to my place and I' show you presentation. Cas Ag Cad Ag Haty

    If your date fired up a projector and started a slide show, I think you're justified in shooting them. I'm fairly certain the police would show up and say, "Yeah, that's clearly self defense."


Next on Dating Fails