'I told a nepo baby that he only has his job because of his uncle': 20-year-old office worker calls out colleague for "pretend[ing] to be humble"

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    AITA for telling my colleague he only has his job because his uncle is the CEO?
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    I'm early 20sF and last year started working at a major company. I entered this job through a scheme for disadvantaged young people. Despite this, the interview process was still incredibly tough and I'm proud to have made it this far.
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    When I'm not with my team I hang out with the other girls I've met and befriended through that scheme. The nephew of the CEO started his role at our department a little later and for whatever reason has been joining us girls for lunches etc. He tries VERY
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    HARD to fit in and acts like he doesn't come from a place of insane privilege. He will literally pretend to be humble and downplay his family's wealth just to seem relatable I guess.
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    The others have been warming up to him but I'm honestly not buying his rather fake personality. The other day I was sitting at the canteen with another coworker and he asked if he could join us. I didn't want that but my coworker immediately said yes.
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    Well he was asking me lots of personal questions and about my journey to the company. I told him that the interview process was hard and mentally draining. He nodded and said that it's tough getting into the place but that his interviews were "fine". Even laughing and saying he came late to one because of a hungover.
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    This made me mad and I said "good for you". He thanked me and said that things always work out when you just "chill out" and stop taking things so seriously. This is when I said that we both know he's not nearly as competent as he believes and that he only got the job bc his uncle is literally the CEO.
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    My friend/coworker gasped and looked at me like I'm crazy. The nephew shrugged and said that I don't seem to like him. I told him that this wasn't a personal matter so likes and dislikes are irrelevant.
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    We didn't argue but he got a little heated. And asking me what I want him to do. Then he said that | may view him as an over privileged a h le but I'm more or less the same (which makes no sense).
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    So I fully expected him to report me to HR but to my surprise he never did. In fact he started following me on my social media accounts and messaging me at work more frequently.
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    My coworker has relayed this incident to the other girls and the consensus is that I'm a major ah le. They said that not only was I unnecessarily hostile and ride, they're also mad he started hanging out with them less. (Not sure if this is a coincidence but I've also been spending less time with them) AITA for giving my unprompted opinions?
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    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the ahle: I told a nepo baby that he only has his job cos of his uncle and I could be the AH for being so blunt and possibly downplaying his skills.
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    km89 YTA. Whenever you need to voice a negative opinion, ask yourself A) does this need to be said, B) does it need to be said right now, and C) does it need to be said right now by me? Does this need to be said? No, not unless there's something about the way
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    he's been acting that you're not conveying. It sounds like he's making an effort to be friendly and not to be one of those guy who swaggers in expecting everyone to kiss his a
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    Does it need to be said right now? No. If you were really concerned, a private conversation or a conversation with your or his manager about his behavior would have been appropriate. Does it need to be said by you? No.
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    It sounds like you're being unreasonably hostile toward. this guy. And it's not a coincidence that they're spending less time with you- -they think you're an ahle, no wonder they don't want to hang out with you.
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    hellolittlebears ESH. He was insensitive for his "things work out fine if you just relax" (because this is true for people of privilege but not everyone else) and you were ride to say he's incompetent and undeserving of his job.
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    (because it can be true that he only got the job because of his uncle AND that he's actually competent at the job). Everyone here could have been a lot more diplomatic, but you were overtly ride.
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    Castle_of_Aaaa... YTA It sounds like the only person trying to put him on a pedestal is you? You may have fought and worked hard to et your job.. and grats to that! You earned it. But why are you so freakin' hostile to this guy? You're LOOKING for ways to spit venom at this guy. How dare
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    he SIT with his coworkers! Disgusting that he tries to be humble and downplay his upbringing! If he were an and flaunting his family wealth, saying, "my uncle's the CEO! You better respect me!" then yeah, i'd say screw that guy. Except he's not. You're the one wasting energy and potential by hissing at someone for factors they can't personally control.
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    You want to hate him because you see him as your privileged enemy. Stop that. You're being a major ahle.
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    Mr_Ham_Man80 So I fully expected him to report me to HR but to my surprise he never did Why would he? Not every social interaction needs to be a World War that results in someone running to HR. Yes nepotism s ks, yes some people's rides are
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    more free than others but it sounds like you had it out for him from the get go. His comments about "chill out" etc do come from a place of ignorance at the very least and he's certainly not read the room. However it sounds like you've decided that he is your axe to grind. It's possible just to be nice to someone at work,
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    like they're a human being, yet still fight the class war in places it actually matters. The fact you're the only one that had a problem is also telling. Unless your colleagues are a fleet of ups and boot lickers (unlikely) then they may have just thought he was a nice person to spend time with. YTA.
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    m... Your delivery is terrible, you need to really communicate what you mean and not how you feel sometimes. You're at work, stick to courteous phrasing. I'm POC and would've simply said 'it's different when you're competing against XYZ people' or 'don't have connections to feel at ease with the company' -
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    'inclusion is fairly new and a deeply personal journey, I don't think we can compare really'. The rest of your post is you projecting, what did you expect him to be/do? He's right to ask. I think he's staying in touch to give you both a chance to know each other on a collegiale level at least. Take the olive branch or keep a
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    polite dialogue and stay professional. You were right that your reaction was not personal, it was your distaste towards ignorant privileged people you had no idea if he was one or not. The only facts. you presented is he's - genuinely nice and trying to break race/social stereotypes and barriers.
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    Why wouldn't you be on board with someone like that? Instead you took politics and spat it in his face, good luck driving progress with that role if this is the attitude you continue with. I do think the leniency is in fact to allow time and space for you all to also acclimate to your environment and the inclusion program process, given the journey there was trying (as you said). Imho
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    take the time to reflect, how would you connect with the colleagues who truly are ally's and support the initiative that included you and more diversity? There's bound to be growing pains for everyone until y'all adjust, this is the change you've been waiting for - are you gonna be part of it and create healthy dialogue and reconcile the differences - or just be pointing out who had what privilege...?
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    [deleted] NTA.....who brags about showing up late and hungover to an interview? The nephew of a CEO that's who. Anyone else who showed up late to an interview would not be back for a second. Granted you
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    probably put your job at risk and nepotism exists everywhere. Your coworkers aren't your friends, do your job, get your money, and go home.
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    Biblioklept73 YTA... You're an inverted snob, act petty and sound. jealous of someones good fortune... You're a real keeper /s...
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    Starfox41 YTA He's right, you literally got your job because you were poor. If your family had a middle of the road income, you never would have gotten an interview. You AREN'T so different.
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