Self-appointed HOA neighborhood enforcer tells homeowner he can't park in front of his house, he maliciously complies: 'I thought you wanted me to park in my driveway?'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Nov 30, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Cars and the parking of them is just one of those things that's always going to cause issues… When it comes to where you're looking to leave your one-ton hunk of metal on wheels, everyone has their own ideas about where you should or shouldn't, regardless of whether or not their ideas are in accordance with any actual laws or rules… Even if you're parking in front of your own home, there's bound to be some neighborhood busybody around just itching to tell you that you shouldn't do it.

That's what this homeowner faced when the neighborhood's "self-appointed" HOA enforcer came knocking, declaring that he couldn't park on the street in front of his house. Their neighborhood didn't even actually have an HOA, but nevertheless, he complied by parking in a worse place, sending the neighbor over the edge.

I hate to be a bit of a buzzkill on this one, but it is worth noting here that blocking a sidewalk with your car as a way of getting even with a neighbor isn't the best idea. If you live in an area with children or disabled or elderly, people forcing them to tread off the footpath and onto the street really isn't a morally justifiable or safe thing to do, regardless of your quarrel with a neighbor. And in most cases, it will be actually illegal to go along with it.

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10435251712
    via Greg Rosenke
  • 02
    Don't like the way I park? Fine, I'll follow the rules EXACTLY. M A couple of months ago, I had a run-in with the self-appointed HOA enforcer of my neighborhood-let's call her Linda. For context, I don't live in an HOA community, but Linda likes to pretend we do. She's the kind of person who leaves passive-aggressive notes on cars, knocks on doors to complain about lawn heights, and calls the city for "violations" that don't actually exist.
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  • 03
    The issue started because I parked my car on the street in front of my house. It's perfectly legal, and I've been doing it for years without any complaints. But apparently, Linda decided that my car was an eyesore. One day, I found a note tucked under my windshield wiper that said:
    via AtomicFile_
  • 04
    "This is NOT a parking lot. Park in your driveway like a respectful neighbor. Don't make me involve the city."
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  • 05
    It annoyed me, but I shrugged it off and kept parking where I always do. That wasn't good enough for Linda. The next time, she confronted me in person.
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  • 06
    Linda: "I've told you before, parking on the street is inconsiderate. You have a driveway; use it!" Me: "It's legal to park here, and I'm not blocking anything." Linda: "It doesn't matter. It's ugly and makes the neighborhood look bad. Park in your driveway, or I'll report you." That's when I decided: fine. If she wants me to park in my driveway, I'll park in my driveway—but I'l| follow every single rule to the letter.
    via AtomicFile_
  • 07
    You see, my driveway is small. If I park my car in it, it blocks the sidewalk. Technically, it's against city ordinances to obstruct the sidewalk. So the next day, I pulled my car right into my driveway, perfectly centered, and guess what? It completely blocked the sidewalk.
    via AtomicFile_
  • 08
    It didn't take long for Linda to notice. She marched up to my door, red-faced and furious. Linda: "You can't block the sidewalk! That's illegal!" Me: "Oh, I thought you wanted me to park in my driveway?" Linda: "Not like that! Park properly!" Me: "There's no other way to park in my driveway without blocking the sidewalk. Guess I'll have to park back on the street then."
    via AtomicFile_
  • 09
    Her face was priceless. She sputtered for a moment before stomping off. Thinking that was the end of it, I parked back on the street. But no, Linda wasn't done yet. She actually called the city on me!
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  • 10
    A week later, a city inspector came by. He checked out the situation, saw that my car was legally parked on the street, and told me I was doing nothing wrong. However, he did mention that Linda had made several complaints about "code violations" in the neighborhood, and they were getting tired of her nonsense.
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  • 11
    After that, I didn't hear from Linda for a while-until last week, when she started parking her car on the street in front of my house. So, I did what any good neighbor would do: I called the city and reported it. Turns out her car was slightly too close to a fire hydrant. She got a ticket. Malicious compliance never felt so sweet.
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  • 12
    darkenedgy Lmao that ending is beautiful
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  • 13
    JoWhee NGL: I thought you were going to park in front of her house. Her getting a ticket is even better.
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  • 14
    Belaerim We had a neighbour like that. "Don't park on the street because it's too hard for me to pull in and out of my driveway with my truck or RV"
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  • 15
    She was a retired city councillor, so she tried to pull that card all the time and call people she knew in bylaw enforcement. They hated her, and so did us neighbours.
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  • 16
    I got bored and spent 5 bucks and an hours time to grab an ride share car, park it exactly to the inch of the legal limit to the edge of her driveway, repeat on the other side, and then another one directly opposite her driveway (with that neighbour's consent, they thought it was hilarious) She freaked out. I repeated it a few times. over the years.
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  • 17
    fjr_1300 Find a cheap, knackered old wreck of a car and park it on her drive while she's out. Then stand back and watch her head implode.
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  • 18
    IntoTheVeryFires Oh so your car (legally) parked in front of your house is an eyesore, but Ms. Holier-than-thou can park her car on the street in front of your house to make a point? Why do people have to get so up in other people's business I'm glad she got the ticket that she's been trying to get the city to give everyone else!
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  • 19
    Ok-Gur-1940 Inspector: "Lady, you've parked too close to the fire hydrant". Linda. "But the closest fire hydrant is three blocks away". Inspector: "Doesn't matter you're still too close".
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  • 20
    ShadowDragon... Turns out her car was slightly too close to a fire hydrant. She got a ticket. That was probably the most satisfying ticket the city inspector has written out in awhile.
    via AtomicFile_
  • 21
    KyrosXIII Linda: "It doesn't matter. It's ugly and makes the neighborhood look bad. Park in your driveway, or I'll report you." Me, who is tired of her bulls : "Well, you're ugly and you make the neighborhood look bad. Stay in your home, or I'll call the circus."
    via AtomicFile_
  • 22
    OptimalSpring6... Great ending!! But is she parked in front of my house I would've parked in front of hers. Hahahaha
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  • 23
    Prof1959 "It's ugly and makes the neighborhood look bad." OK, but Linda, you are ugly and make the neighborhood look bad.
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pro revenge hoa neighbors parking space parking lot malicious compliance parking ticket neighborhood revenge parking drama homeowner neighborhood-drama bad neighbors neighborhood-stories parking stories petty revenge terrible neighbors Bad Neighbor neighbor
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