Woman Remarries Late Husband’s Enemy, Son Refuses to Accept Him Into the Family, Mother in Tears When She Finds Out Husband Can’t Be Involved With the Grandchildren

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Dec 15, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. Seeing your parents get divorced is never easy. The heartache of seeing their marriage falling apart, the dissolution of love that bleeds into your adulthood and relationships, it can all affect a person for their whole life. Not only does the person have to see their parent's marriage sunder, but it can be twice as painful to see them remarry. Accepting your parent's new partner into your life might make you resentful, creating harrowing feelings between you and your parents. 

In this Reddit thread, the original poster (OP) is a man whose parents aren't together, but not because of divorce. His father passed away, and his mother has decided to remarry his late father's work enemy. Due to their beef, OP has a hard time accepting him into the family. Why were they enemies? Well, you'll have to read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01
    Mom got upset and said she really wants my approval of him and for him to be approved to be a future grandfather and FIL to my fiancée. I told her I won't ever stop her marrying him but I won't approve.
    via Canva
  • 02
    r/AITAH • 14 hr. ago ConcernOk9063 AITA for telling my mom she's allowed to get married again but it doesn't mean I'll approve?
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 03
    My dad died when I (26m) was 17. Now my mom has gotten serious with someone else. A guy my dad worked. This is a man who hated my dad and my dad hated him. Mom and I knew about it. There was bad blod for almost 20 years between them. And when dad di d her future husband was the
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 04
    only person at the job who didn't sign the card for us. And my dad would have done the same.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 05
    So for me, there's a strong dislike about mom's choice of partner. But they connected two years ago and both fell hard. She's excited to marry him and have a future together. She even talked about "sharing grandkids" which I made a big face at and told her it wouldn't be happening, which is when we talked.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 06
    I told her she can get married, and to whoever she wanted to, but the fact she married him is not something I approve of exactly and I will not allow him to be a grandfather to my future kids and he won't be someone I try to get close to. Mom told me that's unfair. I told her she can feel that way. But that man hates my dad.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 07
    My dad hated him. I said there is no part of me that wants him around. But I accept she does. I told her I had to come to terms with her choice in partner and I tolerate it. But I want him in my life as little as possible.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 08
    She told me he's a good man and yes, it's awkward with his feelings on dad but we shouldn't hate him for it and he's easy to love. I told her I'm not going to love and accept a man who hates my dad. I asked her how he'll take dad's presence being around all the time. Including at my upcoming
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 09
    wedding next year. She told me it won't be easy for him and that a lot of people are already against him because of his and dad's beef.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 10
    Mom got upset and said she really wants my approval of him and for him to be approved to be a future grandfather and FIL to my fiancée. I told her I won't ever stop her marrying him but I won't approve.
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 11
    She's angry and upset with me. She said she wants to share all this with him and she deserves it even if I don't think he does. AITA?
    via u/ConcernOk9063
  • 12
    I. 13h ago Edited 51m ago • Anyone else wondering why OP's dad and this guy hated each other? Any chance it had to do with Mom?
    via u/InvisibleBlueRobot
  • 13
    Perfect_Ring3489 . 14h ago Nta. You told the truth. Its an odd situation. She can be happy, doesnt mean you have to pretend.
    via u/Perfect_Ring3489
  • 14
    Remarkable-Pa... • 13h ago NTA. Has it even crossed your mom's mind that this man may be getting off on the fact that he's getting to sleep with his enemy's wife? Like he's somehow won and got one over on your dad.
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  • 15
    Sorry I know that's your mom but we're all adults.
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  • 16
    SteampunkHarley • 13h ago • Top 1% Commenter Choices have consequences. Shes with the person her husband hated the most and she's surprised you and others aren't cool with it?
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  • 17
    That's not how it works. He's probably only with her to pull one over your dad, on last time
    via u/SteampunkHarley
  • 18
    Zealousideal_M... • 14h ago • Top 1% Commenter I think you are handling this maturely. You told her you accept she is an adult with the ability to choose her partner, you just won't engage. You didn't give her an ultimatum. We all have
    via u/Zealousideal_M
  • 19
    the freedom of choice, not the freedom from consequences.
    via u/Zealousideal_M
  • 20
    Common-Ad718 • 13h ago • Top 1% Commenter NTA. Basically your mom wants you to publicly "approve" her new husband so everyone who also doesn't like him for the same reasons as you (really valid by the way); so she can say see my
    via u/Common-Ad718
  • 21
    son likes him please like him too, and make everything easy for him. Your stance is very mature. You're not wrong to let her know what their future will be.
    via u/Common-Ad718
  • 22
    Thistime232 14h ago Top 1% Commenter Why did they hate each other?
    via u/Thistime232
  • 23
    CowboyGorilla... • 13h ago • NTA, jesus, what happened between them? That has had to be something crazy. Its insane to me he didnt even sign the card, i mean how did he not wish his family (you) any condelences, you guys didnt do anything to him.
    via u/CowboyGorilla
  • 24
    Honestly sounds like an immature guy (or at least he was back then) Its not that you dont want her to be happy/arent happy for her, its that you just dont want to include someone in your life. that you dont like. Its your life and youre free to choose who you dont want surround
    via u/CowboyGorilla
  • 25
    yourself with, just as shes free to choose whos around her. Youre setting a boundary with her and she'll have to respect it, i mean, what other choice does she have? Its easy to compromise in this situation, either she does or she'll be excluding herself from your life right along him
    via u/CowboyGorilla
  • 26
    andyroo776 12h ago • NtA. So i wonder why all the hate between them? Your mom? I would be making sure you get all of your dads stuff into your possession asap because it will disappear otherwise.
    via u/andyroo776

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