21-year-old pregnant woman asks her 16-year-old sister to switch bedrooms after she trashes her carpet with filth for the second time: 'Why should I have to clean up her mess AGAIN for a room I don’t even want?'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jan 29, 2025 6:00 PM EST

My sister and I could not be more different when it comes to standards of cleanliness. Although I've improved over the years, having a clean room was never my priority as a kid. I was only mildly frustrated with any kind of mess and not particularly keen about fixing it unless I absolutely had to, and even then, it was marginal. I literally taped string cheese wrappers to my wall as a kind of contemporary art piece, and I can assure you my sister would've never done anything of the sort.

My sister was clean and organized from the word go. It's a blessing for her that we didn't have to share rooms after I was 7 and she was 5, because my presence would've really harshed her vibe. She literally got hired by housewives in our neighborhood to organize their closets for them, and she did a darn good job at it. 

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  • But that was childhood. As the older sibling who has grown and matured since my younger days, I think that if you can't competently keep your room clean as an adult, something's really got to give. That's especially true if your room is also your unborn baby's room. They should not not suffer because mom can't vacuum the carpet. 

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10460788480
    via Cj (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA refusing switch rooms with my pregnant sister?

    I 16f live with my older sister 21f and both my parents. My sister is currently pregnant with twins and is due in April. Before my sister got pregnant we switched rooms which was a HUGE mistake on my part because I had to spend 4 hours cleaning HER room after we switched. Even though she told me to clean mine because she was "going to clean hers". Now I should've known better
    via u/MineNo1730
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    Cheezburger Image 10460794368
    via Juan Encalada

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 04
    because I know her but you have to understand I am not being dramatic with 2 people it took my friend and I a little bit over 4 hours to get it livable for my standards. I had to shampoo the carpet 3 times for it to smell decent. Sorry I just need to get it across for this story to make sense. Now the room I'm in now had a bathroom that was previously broken because you'll
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 05
    never guess, my sister broke it! About 3 months ago we got it fixed. And 3 months ago now suddenly she's not going to be able to raise her babies upstairs because there's not enough room. Now my room is a little bigger than hers, but not by much. I have a smaller bed than she does so she would take up more space in this room than I would so that could also be why
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 06
    she feels her space is not big enough. Now here's my issue her carpet upstairs is stained BAD the carpet is mostly hard and it reeks of mold not to mention IM going to have to clean it. I'm sorry but why should I be punished? I'm not pregnant? I didn't do anything to deserve this? I know my parents won't clean it, or ask her to. Why should I have to clean up her mess
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 07
    AGAIN for a room I don't even want. There is stains all over the walls, and trash stashed in every corner because it's "clean". Now I understand that after she gives birth it most definitely will affect her ability to walk upstairs where her room is, which is her new reason for us needing to switch rooms but not even two months ago she was sleeping in the living room because she couldn't walk
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 08
    upstairs which was weird because she switched back to her room upstairs?? I'm not going to say anything because you know I'm 16 I've never been pregnant before but that was just a little odd to me. But I really like my room I've put in a lot of money time and effort into it and I don't really want to have to do it again, my mom tells me that she won't make us switch but I'm
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 09
    worried my sister will guilt trip her into doing what she wants like always, but where I might've been the a hole is when she asked me for the 2nd time she said I had already agreed to switch rooms which was not true. So, I got angry and told her I never agreed to that to stop making sh up and she'd have to kill me to get this room from me. Which caused her to get angry
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 10
    and we started arguing so am I thea_h_le for refusing to switch rooms?
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 11
    SEN
    via OSPAN ALI
  • 12
    EmceeSuzy I'm going with NTA but you need to stop with the drama. If she asks to switch rooms, just say No calmly. Even if she asks over and over again. Also, make yourself a lot less available to her. Plenty of new mothers have bedrooms upstairs. I did. My nursery was upstairs. And I certainly wasn't 21 when I started my family. She is young and spry and being ridiculous.
    via u/EmceeSuzy
  • 13
    pjeans I agree with NTA and don't feed the drama. I had 2 kids in my 40s with all bedrooms upstairs. Not that big of a deal unless she already had mobility problems... which would be odd, since she wanted the upstairs room before.
    via u/pjeans
  • 14
    HeartKevin Rose First kid at 33. Everyone slept upstairs. We're all alive now.
    via u/HeartKevinRose
  • 15
    crystallz2000 This. OP, stop interacting with her. "I said, no." Then, avoid her as much as possible. I'd also talk with your parents now about expectations for her and her babies. I have a BAD feeling people are going to be expecting you to help with these babies, and I'd be clear now that she had the kids, so she needs to take care of them. Focus just on being on the same page with your parents and ignore her.
    via u/crystallz2000
  • 16
    Successful_Voice8542 Or if you do start feeling pressure, tell your mother you will only swap rooms if the upstairs has new carpet installed and is professionally painted. Then you won't be the bad guy, get to move into a clean space, and putting a bit of distance and a flight of stairs between you and infants crying all day and night might be a good thing.
    via u/Successful_Voice8542
  • 17
    planta222 Is the baby even gonna be safe living with her??? I think there's a bigger issue here not being addressed. If the walls and carpet are really that bad and the room is filled with trash that's really not healthy
    via u/planta222
  • 18
    Environmental_Art591 If the walls and carpet are really that bad AFTER ONLY 3 MONTHS. I really hope OP is exaggerating how unclean her sister is because if that 21 yr old is following the same cleaning method as my 12 and 9 yr old ND boys then I am worried about the health and saftey of those twins
    via u/Environmental_Art591
  • 19
    OverallLie6602 I can clean my whole entire house by myself in 4 hours. OP said they needed a friend to help with a single room for the same amount of time. Also shampooing the carpet 3 times? as a 16 year old? Where are the parents in this? Why aren't they telling their adult daughter to clean her sh? Are they enabling it and just as bad?
    via u/OverallLie6602
  • 20
    Environmental_Art591 Where are the parents in this? Why aren't they telling their adult daughter to clean her sh? Are they enabling it and just as bad? While i do agree with this line of thought, I'm more worried about what else they will enable OPs sister to do to OP. Free round the clock babysitting??
    via u/Environmental_Art591
  • 21
    Jallenrix Why are your parents allowing your sister to trash their house?
    via u/Jallenrix
  • 22
    Electrical Whole1830 They never raised her to be a responsible adult, and now she is going to have twins, while living with her parents and destroying their house. Good God.
    via u/Electrical_Whole1830
  • 23
    Consistent-Leopard71 NTA. Your sister is being ridiculous and sounds like a slob. There are parents all over the world who raise children win homes with stairs.
    via u/Consistent-Leopard71
  • 24
    whoubeiamnot Slob is generous. Sister sounds like a walking biohazard. It's only going to get worse when the babies are born. I have an aunt that was very much like this and everyone avoided her home. My mother once told me on a visit from our great grandmother she convinced them to visit her home. My poor great grandma threw up as soon as they walked in the stench was so bad. Nta.
    via u/whoubeiamnot
  • 25
    Prestigious-Bluejay5 my mom tells me that she won't make us switch Have a conversation with your mom. Tell her that you appreciate the fact that she's not forcing the switch and if your sister tells your mom that you're onboard, that is not true. Remind your mom how much time,
    via u/Prestigious-Bluejay5
  • 26
    effort and work you had to put into cleaning the room, only for your sister to trash the upstairs room. Tell her that you are not willing to go through that again. Sounds like every time your sister wants a clean room, she'll ask you to switch. Yeah, no. NTA. And install a lock on your door.
    via u/Prestigious-Bluejay5
  • 27
    MineNo1730 OP I would like to mention that I already talked to my mom and she told me no matter what it's my choice if we switch or not she will not force me to switch I love my mom
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 28
    FW_layerAUS-anyms Your mother doesn't want your pregnant sister there and for her to get her own place. Stick to your mothers plan. Keep your room lol. I know where your mother is coming from.
    via u/FW_layerAUS-anyms
  • 29
    AdGroundbreaking4397 Nta but you've got a parent problem. The state of her room is unacceptable (for anyone) for babies esp newborns. And it could get them taken off her and placed in foster care because your parents' house is deemed unsafe for the babies and both your parents and sister unsuitable caregivers.
    via u/AdGroundbreaking4397
  • 30
    MineNo1730 OP Believe me I am completely aware and have tried to bring it up several times. My older sister is EXTREMELY stubborn and believes that she is always right. I've tried to tell her that it's not a safe space for her kids and if she keeps up her cleaning habits and some others that my lil nieces are gonna get taken away but I obviously have no idea what I'm talking about because I'm 16
    via u/MineNo1730
  • 31
    flickanelde Info: what is she doing that is making the carpet hard???
    via u/flickanelde
  • 32
    MineNo1730 OP actually probably is not the worst thing on that floor the stains are all like different colors and textures kinda like a guessing game ig
    via u/MineNo1730

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Babies family drama cleaning clean pregnancy gross sisters siblings bathroom family bedroom pregnant sibling sister little sister dirty parents carpet
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