Parents try to steal from their 18-year-old's college fund to pay for the Golden Child's wedding, then the college freshman refuses: 'That money [is] for my education'

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Feb 27, 2025 5:00 PM EST

It seems like in every family, there's a Golden Child—the one who gets the full attention, funding, and love from their parents. They can do no wrong, get everything they want, and leave the other lonesome kid to fend for themselves. Can you guess which sibling I was in my family dynamic? 

While I may have never been the Golden Child, being the unfavored kid gives you some insights on life. Frankly, you're usually better equipped to handle life's ups and downs, and you're more likely to be well-adjusted and independent. However, the road to independence is often frustrating as the non-Golden Child learns that the world is unfair—especially in their family. The kid in this next story was at the end of his wits after getting an acceptance letter to his dream school. After years of planning around the college fund his grandparents had set up for him, he was ready to launch into his future, debt-free! 

Except, his parents seemed to think that his college fund could be used for his 25-year-old brother's imminent lavish wedding, attempting to rob his college fund to bankroll Big Bro's nuptials.

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    via BongkarnThanyakij

    (The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.)

    If you're under 40 and have a college degree, you probably have a mountain of student loans with your name on it. With that in mind, the prospect of a debt-free college education is nearly priceless, making this parents' betrayal far, far more frustrating. 

  • "AITAH for Refusing to Let My Parents Use My College Fund for My Brother’s Wedding?"

    I (18M) just turned 18 and recently got accepted into my dream university. My grandparents set up a college fund for me when I was born, and it has enough to cover most of my tuition. My parents have always known about this fund, and I've been planning my education around it.
    via nottyourguy
  • A few weeks ago, my older brother (25M) announced that he's getting married. My parents are paying for most of the wedding but recently told me that they need to borrow from my college fund to cover extra costs. I was shocked and told them no, since that money was meant for my education.
    via nottyourguy
  • They argued that I could just take out student loans and that "family comes first." My brother and his fiancée also called me selfish, saying I should "help out" since they want a big wedding. I refused again. Now, my parents are saying they're disappointed in me, and my brother isn't speaking to me. AITAH for refusing to give up my college fund?
    via nottyourguy
  • Feisty_Plankton775 They can also take out loans to pay for the wedding (and would most likely get a better interest rate than your student loans). They can take money out of the equity on their home if they own, open a credit card, take money from their retirement accounts, etc. There is O reason it should come from your college fund. NTA.
    via Feisty_Plankton775
  • nottyourguy I just don't understand why my future is the first thing they're willing to sacrifice. There are so many other ways they could handle this, but instead, they're choosing to take away the one thing that was meant to give me a better life. It really hurts.
    via nottyourguy
  • Cheezburger Image 10472586496
    via DragonImages

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Lost_Needleworker285 Nta, and I'd make sure they can't access it without you knowing.
    via Lost_Needleworker285
  • FitzDesign Well you have a 100% confirmation of who the golden child is..... You need to go see a lawyer to ensure that they cannot screw you over as they will if they can. Protect yourself and your college funds.
    via nottyourguyFitzDesign
  • eratoesben NTA education is far more - important than a wedding. Goodness me, you need to start documenting every conversation, screenshot messages and talk to someone legally. It may be costly but this is your money, provided by your grandparents for a specific reason.
    via eratoesben
  • They are acting extremely entitled and juvenile. Don't fight with words it will drain you. Fight back through the correct channels and make it be known that you have no qualms in going public that they are treating their son's wedding as far more important than your education, so much so that they are stealing from you. You owe them nothing, hold your head high
    via eratoesben
  • Limelnternational856 NTA and let your grandparents know what's going on in case your parents and/or brother try to manipulate them into giving them the money. Also tell your parents that since "family helps family" they can stump up the full amount for the wedding or ask the future in laws to help.
    via Limelnternational856
  • No_Upstairs_5192 NTA, PLEASE see a lawyer immediately for the sake of your funds, to make sure they do not legally have access to take it.
    via No_Upstairs_5192
  • _danica- NTA. Your parents really hit you with the "family comes first" while expecting you to tank student debt for an open bar and a fancy cake? Wild. Your brother is 25 if he can't afford his dream wedding, he should scale it down, not raid your future. Tell them you'll contribute by showing up, eating the free food, and leaving with a centerpiece. That's more than enough.
    via _danica-
  • IPepSal NTA. "Family comes first." Then tell them that your brother should pay for your college tuition because you're his family.
    via IPepSal
  • FoxySlyOldStoatyFox Let them use their retirement fund for it instead.
    via FoxySlyOldStoatyFox

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