'It seems like everyone but you is responsible': Dad accuses friend's kids of stealing his 8-year-old's toy, blames wife for not putting it away

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 3, 2025 6:00 PM EST

Kids are unpredictable. You never quite know what their next move is going to be. Maybe they'll start crying because their pants are a little too tight. Maybe, out of nowhere, they will ask you why dolphins have blowholes. Maybe they'll throw a Lego at your face just to see what would happen. You truly never know. Another fun (and common) thing that kids will do is steal. They haven't quite internalized the idea of personal property, and they love to grab it. It's only natural that many kiddos end up going through a little bit of a klepto phase. They can't help it. They're like Ariana Grande: "I want it? I got it."
It's the responsibility of the adults around them to make sure this impulse doesn't happen at inopportune times and get them in trouble. But you have to learn some lessons on your own sometimes. Not everything is going to be easy. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10472901632
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The adult in this story didn't handle this situation so well. He turned to blame everyone but himself and refused to see it for what it is: a small issue. So he ended up burning some bridges in the process. Read on for the story and see what you think. 

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    AITA For accusing my friend's kids of stealing my child's toys?

    Last week my friend (28m) and I (26m) have had our kids together for a play date. He has 4 kids ranging from 5 years old to 11 years old. We were at my house, my child (86) has pokemon cards. Some cards were in a book, these cards were the special ones. After our friends leave this book
    via u/Broad-Try2311
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    magically disappears. This is the third time something of my child's has came up missing after our friends have came over. I have tore my child's room apart looking for this book of cards. I blamed my wife for not putting the book away with the other special toys she put away before our gathering. It was supposed to be her responsibility to keep our child's belongings safe. This book is no where to be found.
    via u/Broad-Try2311
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    This is where I may the ahole, I don't want these kids at my house; I have played h I calming my daughter down after her stuff came up missing. I asked to be payed back for at least a portion of what my child lost. Now my friendship is just about over because I accused his kids of theft.
    via u/Broad-Try2311
  • 05

    Commenters were quick to point out the hypocrisy of blaming his wife, but not himself.

    Catracas 23h ago • YTA for blaming your wife. It's also your responsibility to keep your child's belongings safe! Why is it only her responsibility? Also your daughter is 8, so she probably can start learning to put her own things away.
    via u/Catracas
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    As for the stealing -- it is reasonable to not want your friends' kids at your house if it always ends in tears for your daughter. Fair. Dunno how exactly you brought it up to your friends, but how tactful were you? You could have tried playing nice and asking them to check if maybe your kids' things got mixed up, before asking immediately to be payed back.
    via u/Catracas
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    FinnFinnFinnegan 23h ago YTA for blaming your wife for something you could have done. Meet the friends kids at the park, and bring up missing toys to your friend.
    via u/FinnFinnFinnegan
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    aj_alva 21h ago You invite your friend to come over for a play date. Your friend/his kids steal toys from your child. You blame your wife for not protecting your child's property from YOUR friends and YOUR friends children?
    via u/aj_alva
  • 09
    This is the third time this has happened. And you're upset about the friendship being over... Why tf would you even allow these people near your home/child/family? YTA.
    via u/aj_alva
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    Snackinpenguin • 21h ago . Why is this solely your wife's responsibility to put valuable toys away?? If you saw an issue, why didn't you deal with it as a parent? YTA.
    via u/Snackinpenguin
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    Cheezburger Image 10472902144
    via Kelly Sikkema

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    CrewelSummer 22h ago . YTA It's not your wife's responsibility to keep your child's belongings safe when YOU are the one supervising the playdate. Because this has happened before, you should have been supervising
    via u/CrewelSummer
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    everything the children were playing with the entire time. Yeah, I get that it's less fun for you and your buddy if you can't just kick the kids elsewhere while you two socialize, but that's the gig of parenting, my dude. You and your buddy should have had the kids playing within
    via u/CrewelSummer
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    eyesight the entire time. Put some OK toys out in a living room or play room for the kids, shut the door to the bedrooms and let everyone know they're off limits, grab some beverages, and socialize while you're in the same room with the kids and your eyes are on them at all times. That way you know if a child leaves the area (and could be getting into something) or if a toy that shouldn't be brought out is.
    via u/CrewelSummer
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    Or meet at a park or a play place where there is no risk of toys coming out that should stay put away. YOU failed to supervise properly, and your child's belongings went missing AGAIN. Next time, you need to step up as a parent instead of putting all the responsibility of parenting on your wife so that you could have fun with your bud.
    via u/CrewelSummer
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    Jeepers Creepers74 . 21h ago YTA. It seems like everyone (your friend, his kids, your wife) is responsible for the missing cards except you, the parent who was there when they were brought out was in the best position to take them and put them somewhere safe at that point.
    via u/JeepersCreepers74
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    Your friendship is over because you treated your friend as poorly as you treat your wife. Think about that.
    via u/JeepersCreepers74
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    Waste_Worker6122 • 23h ago Did your friend's children steal the toys? Perhaps. Do you have tangible proof? No. I couldn't think of a better way to infuriate a child's parents than to accuse their little darlings of theft with no real evidence. The responsibility
    via u/Waste_Worker6122
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    is yours and your wife's. If you don't want your child's toys to grow legs and walk out the door when you have visitors, lock the valuable toys away and supervise the visits. YTA.
    via u/Waste_Worker6122
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    a_lee4 21h ago YTA - you should have asked your friends if they knew. anything about it in a non accusing way, not demand payment for something their child may or may not have taken. Only a doormat personality would respond well to your accusation and demand. Plus a softer
    via u/a_lee4
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    approach would prompt them to look for the book in their house, I assume what you'd really like is the book back not money. And your wife did nothing wrong, she is no more in charge of the belongings in the house then you are, you messed up earlier than you think you did.
    via u/a_lee4
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    Crazy-Al-2855 . 21h ago YTA for going off on your wife, obviously. You're the grown man hosting this sh, so deal with it. NTA for thinking it may have been stolen. Did you ask the other parent to look into it, or do you go off on them kids with unfounded accusations like you did to your wife? Maybe YTA completely then?
    via u/Crazy-Al-2855
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    SpaceAceCase • 20h ago YTA your kid is 8, well old enough to learn to put special items away it's completely bonkers that you spent a paragraph here blaming your wife for this nonsense.
    via u/SpaceAceCase
  • 24
    Keely369 • 19h ago AH for blaming your wife, NTA for not wanting those kids back in the house assuming this is 3 disappearances with the same family.
    via u/Keely369
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    • ThatOneHaitian 17h ago YTA- It seems like everyone but you is responsible for things that go missing. You have no way of knowing if your friend's child even took the book to begin with. That's your child as well and 8 years old is old enough to start learning to keep up with their things.
    via u/ThatOneHaitian

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