Entitled bride issues invites two months before wedding, shames brother for not backing out of $30,000 cruise last-minute just to be in attendance: "She knew full well we were going to be away"

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    AITA for going on a cruise and missing sisters wedding

    "We are spending more then 30 grand vacation." on this
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    M34. Booked a cruise for my 6th anniversary with my wife. Going with some close friends of ours. We do pretty good for ourselves and we booked one of the best suites on the ship with several
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    packages(drink, food etc.) 14 days leaving from nyc down to the Caribbean and back. Now here's the dilemma. The cruise is in April, and my sister set her wedding for when we are supposed to be away. We booked over a year and a half ago and my sister knew full well we were going to be away and still insisted on having her wedding that day.
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    Furthermore she only found out a date and told everyone less than 2 months before when it's set to happen. We are spending more then 30 grand on this vacation and have spent countless hours on the phone with the cruise line and there's not looking like a ton of options available for us. We have
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    already payed the full amount for our sailing, have booked excursions, and so on. The cruise offered us partial refund and credit towards a future cruise but this is the last sailing for this itinerary and honestly I would call it me and my wife's dream itinerary. It has so much good places we have never been to, always wanted to go to, I could go on. Not to mention we
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    have an extremely busy schedule, likely will have to end up waiting months probably more like years for another opportunity to go on this cruise line with a desirable itinerary as it is a premium line and sailings that we are interested in are few and far in
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    between. There's no option to change the wedding date and honestly I'm ready just to not go. My sister is ped at me despite her knowing when I was going to be away. She's putting a lot of money into her wedding and is having a big ceremony with hundreds of people. I don't know what to do. I think I'm going to miss it. AITA? Should I skip it?
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    darkenough812 NTA, with her telling everyone less than 2mo before what the date was she should have assumed not everyone would be able to go. Sheesh I invited people about 8 months before my wedding and I thought that was cutting it a little close.
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    majesticjewnicorn Even if full invitations aren't printed... people still send "save the date" information to their guests. When we got engaged, we sent the save the dates out about a month after we got engaged.
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    If someone sent me a wedding invitation only 2 months before their wedding, and they didn't belong to a culture whereby arranged marriages make for very quick weddings, I'd assume that I
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    was only invited because other invitees couldn't make it, rather than assume that the bride couldn't get their sh together and send out invites in advance.
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    Unusual Telephone_95 You already had plans. She knew it. She decided to have it then anyway so she should have known you likely weren't coming. It's unfortunate but I don't. think you need to cancel to accommodate.
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    AJourneyer Skip the wedding. Seriously do the cruise. This is - all on your sister and her choices. Your sister is rather a brat, isn't she?
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    lovelylavendder I know it's your sister but if I made a cruise with my husband and my sister knew it was booked a year before for MY anniversary and she still made the wedding date and expected me to cancel my non
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    refundable trip, I would let her be mad at me. I married my husband who is now my family, if you cancel your trip think about how your wife may feel. You married her she's your family. Your sister will always be your family but it almost seems like she did it on purpose.
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    majesticjewnicorn I wonder if the wedding date is exactly on the same date as OP's anniversary? In which case, that is a massive AH move because there are 365 days of the year and hijacking your sibling's anniversary to then turn every future anniversary into the sister's spotlight is downright cruel.
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    waitingforsummer2 Is it possible the sister is jealous and trying to ruin yourself financially big cruise? Why else would she plan the wedding for when you would be gone. You let her know way in advance that you were booked she could have literally chosen any other time of the year. Do NOT cancel your cruise. Send a nice gift instead
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    MLiOne Yeah, a 5 year planner to go in the wall.
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    LibraryMouse4321 Your sister wanted to ruin your vacation. That's the only reason she would book her wedding during the time you were supposed to be on your cruise. That, or she just didn't want you to attend her wedding.
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    She knew you were going away and she booked her wedding at that time anyway. She did it on purpose. Go on your cruise and don't go to the wedding. But make sure that you let everyone that you care about know in advance so that she doesn't make you out to be the bad guy at the wedding.
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    Be prepared for her to tell everyone that she isn't important enough to you to cancel or postpone your trip. That money and a vacation is more important than family. She won't tell them that the trip was paid for a year ago and she knew all about it, but still planned her wedding during that time.
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    Mrs Retiree2Be She's trying to make OP choose her wedding over OP's wife. Main character syndrome and manipulative behavior. The cruise was scheduled first. OP, NTA. Curious if your sister knows about the partial refund? Is she willing to cover the difference so you can attend?

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