'I ended up using a Cash App loan to cover the meal': Mom insists son take her to Chili's, forks the bill over despite him not having money to pay it, leaving him with $.30 in his bank account

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 22, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

When money is tight, the last place you want to go is out to dinner. It's a luxury that not all of us can afford all the time, let alone regularly. You'd be hard-pressed to eat at a sit-down restaurant and not spend a pretty chunk of change, especially if you're covering somebody else's meal. That quickly becomes an expense that might throw off your monthly budget. This is why it's usually your choice to take someone out to dinner. Maybe they're celebrating something, or maybe you're just feeling generous. Either way, you've decided that this is how you want to spend your money. 

Other times, though, you end up in a situation where your hand is forced. You didn't know that you were going to spend that much money, but you did. Maybe something cost more than you thought it would, or maybe someone you were with pressured you into spending it. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10483159040
    via Unsplash+ (Brock Wegner)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The latter is what happened in this story, where a tenuous relationship between mother and son ended up in an awkward conversation when the bill came. Despite clearly communicating that he couldn't afford the dinner, his mom all but forced him to pay for it anyway. Read on for the story and see what you think.

  • 02

    AITA? My mom pushed me to go out to eat then, pushed the bill off on me.

    Today, after I finished work (I get off two hours early on Wednesdays), I was supposed to go grocery shopping for my mom. When I stopped at home, I went to her house. She told me she hadn't received her new credit card in the mail yet, which she gets every few months because she's paranoid about someone stealing her card info. That usually means I end up updating all of her online payments because she doesn't know how to use the internet very well.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 03
    When I got there, she mentioned the missing card, which was fine because she has three others. However, she didn't want to use them for groceries. That was okay with me; I could go another day if she preferred. Then, she asked me to take her to Chili's. Now, when my mom says "take me," it's understood that she usually pays.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 04
    She's financially well-off, my dad left her comfortable when he passed, and she hasn't worked in over 35 years. So, whenever we go out, she covers the bill, unless it's something specifically for her, in which case either my brother or I pay. Even my grown nephews will pay when it's for her, but otherwise, my mom always takes care of the bill. I'm not being entitled, it's just how it's always been. I always thank her, especially since I'm not doing well financially and appreciate her help.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 05
    Before we left, I told her I didn't have money for dinner since my refund check hadn't cleared yet (NFCU takes 2-3 days to release funds), and I get paid on Friday. She insisted on going out anyway, and dinner was great. When the bill came, my mom handed it to me. I didn't have enough money, so I ended up using a Cash App
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 06
    loan to cover the meal. My mom then made me feel guilty for asking her to leave the tip because I only had $.30 left after paying for the food. She ended up leaving 19 $1 bills she had in her wallet. I told her to keep the ones, and I'd tip the waiter next time since I go there often and know him well.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 07
    After leaving, I was upset and speaking quietly. My mom noticed and got angry, saying I was "acting up." I explained that I didn't have the money and still needed gas and food for my kid before Friday. She yelled, saying that when she and my dad were together, they never fought over money. I clarified I wasn't fighting, just
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 08
    explaining that the situation wasn't ideal. My mom has always been hard to talk to, and I've noticed myself getting louder when I'm upset lately, but I didn't yell this time. I just explained the situation. She responded that I clearly had the money since I paid for the meal and that she always covers the bill, so what was the big deal?
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 09
    I tried to explain that the issue was me telling her I didn't have the money, and she still pushed for us. to go out after I said I couldn't afford it. I assumed that since she knew I was short on funds, she would cover the bill. I realize now that I shouldn't have assumed that.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 10
    So, AITA for getting upset with my mom for pushing the bill onto me when I clearly told her I didn't have it?
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 10483161088
    via Unsplash+ (Brock Wegner)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 12

    Commenters saw both sides of this mother-son dispute.

    stream_inspector 14h ago ESH. Communication. Don't go freaking in debt for a meal at chili's- and if you're that broke, you shouldn't be there often enough to be buddies with the waiter. Mom s ks if she has plenty of money and demands to go and then refuses to pay.
    via u/stream_inspector
  • 13
    livesina-dream • 14h ago . YTA to yourself. Say no? Do you not have a backbone? You took money out of your kid's mouth for your ungrateful and entitled mom. Great parenting on both ends.
    via u/livesina-dream
  • 14
    • frlejo 14h ago You When the bill came, my mom handed it to me That is when you bwcame the ah to yourself. You should have handed the bill back to mom cause told her you could not afford it.
    via u/frlejo
  • 15
    Agreeable_Leopar... 14h ago Your mom's financial situation is not as good as you think it is
    via u/Agreeable_Leopard_39
  • 16
    Ok_Stable7501 • 14h ago Your mother can pay for grocery and meal delivery. NTA
    via u/Ok_Stable7501
  • 17
    Lopsided_Score1609 OP • 14h ago I tried that, she ended up buying 3 of the same meals from DoorDash because she didn't know what she was doing AND groceries, she bought stuff she didn't need. She's 71 and computer/Internet illiterate
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 18
    RaineMist • 14h ago NTA Normally when someone offers to go eat somewhere, they usually pay unless otherwise. Your mom knew you didn't have money and insisted anyway. Only one who should feel guilty is her.
    via u/RaineMist
  • 19
    NavaarCat · 13h ago ESH. Your mom for not listening to you, you for not asserting your boundaries & clarifying things. It sounds like your mom has money problems she is hiding from you & deflected by getting mad about the bill. She couldn't get her groceries (is
    via u/NavaarCat
  • 20
    she disabled in some way or some kind of familial piety that you do her shopping for her?) & then forced you to pay after your clearly stating you couldn't afford to go out to eat. You mentioned your late father left her comfortable, it sounds like
    via u/NavaarCat
  • 21
    you help manage her shopping & things so all she needs to do is spend. She's either always been, or has become entitled & forgotten how budgets & finances actually work. I recommend having a conversation with her about the reality of your finances vs. hers going
    via u/NavaarCat
  • 22
    forward, so she is perhaps less likely to repeat this. I would also see if my earlier comment about her own finances bears any truth just in case she continues to behave like she has access to money (yours or hers) that doesn't exist.
    via u/NavaarCat
  • 23
    Lopsided_Score1609 OP 13h ago • I do her shopping due to her being disabled. She doesn't walk well, she can't stand long, can't drive, can't see well. Also, I'm Filipino so it's almost expected of me to do whatever my parents tell me and I am to be respectful and do as I'm told, so I do as I'm told. but I do manage her finances and do her taxes, she really is well off and in literally no debt. Shes
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 24
    the type of person who puts everything on their CC and then pays it off when they go home. 6 digits saved, she receives slightly more yearly from retirements accounts than my wife and I make yearly. She bought me a new washer and dryer, the nice LG ones just because mine broke, put it on her CC and paid it off the same day.
    via u/Lopsided_Score1609
  • 25
    Imchatterbox • 14h ago ESH. Your mom for pushing it on you, and you for not standing up to her and refusing to pay because you don't have any money. Taking out Cash App loans won't help you.
    via u/Imchatterbox
  • 26
    LavenderPearl Tea 14h ago NTA. For see her CC up anymore. She's a grown as adult. It's not necessary to change it every few months. What. The. H I. Also, forcing your broke kid to pay after pretending she'd treat is lousy. It merits you never going out with her again.
    via u/LavenderPearlTea

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

aita kids money problems moms parenting no money dad making money reddit thread parent Reddit raising kids adult children money Parenting Fail parents children Parenting FAILS
Scroll Down For The Next Article