'It took 2 times...': Rookie firefighter weaponizes his incompetence to achieve epic malicious compliance when senior firefighter demands coffee every morning

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Elna McHilderson • Managing Editor
Mar 26, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

It's not easy starting a new job. You are the rookie and will be treated as such, even in the nicest of workplaces. It's just how the cookie crumbles. You don't have the hang of everything yet and your coworkers are going to notice that. It's not in every workplace that they take advantage of the rookie, but in some places they do, as for instance, firefighters. Apparently, the rookie will usually get some mild hazing, but in this case, he was given early morning coffee duty. That doesn't sound so bad, but it is quite annoying and not the job a firefighter wants. But how do you get out of such a task?

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  • By being really really horrible at making coffee. It's called weaponized incompetence and sometimes it can be a very helpful tool. Here, you can see it being used on a senior firefighter who was demanding a rookie firefighter make the morning coffee for all the senior firefighters every single morning. This new guy was not a coffee drinker, but he's not stupid. He could have figured out how to make a drinkable cup of coffee. But he decided to turn the tides in his own direction by becoming the world's worst barista. It only took TWO times of him making coffee before they told him to please stop. 

  • A pe
    via Unsplash+ (and Aidan Bartos)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "My coffee malicious compliance story…"

    So, many years ago, I had just gotten hired on as a rookie firefighter at a moderate sized city in the Southeastern United States. Other than the typical ribbing that rookies. always get, my probie year was not bad. There was,
    via Abby-Norman
  • however, a Lieutenant that NO one liked...at all. And wouldn't you know, I got assigned to his engine company for a three month rotation.
    via Abby-Norman
  • He DEMANDED that I was to do all the station chores (which is normal), and he threatened to give me poor evals if I did not have coffee ready at all times. for the senior firefighters. This was not normal, and the rest of the engine company knew this.
    via Abby-Norman
  • Me being a rookie, and not wanting a bad eval (note that I am not a coffee drinker), I decided to give him what he wanted, but as a non coffee drinker would make coffee.
    via Abby-Norman
  • I absolutely filled the coffee filter to the rim, like I had to scrape it off level at the top. I Then proceeded to use about one half to three quarters the amount of water needed.
    via Abby-Norman
  • The resulting coffee was so strong and so thick you just about had to cut a piece off after you poured it....completely undrinkable.
    via Abby-Norman
  • Two times. It took two times, and I was ordered not to make coffee anymore. I got terrific evals as well.
    via Abby-Norman
  • Cheezburger Image 10485804288
    via Unsplash+ (and Kateryna Hliznitsova)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • VermilionKoala completely undrinkable CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
    via VermilionKoala
  • Motheroftheworldll My son was in the military and was told to make coffee once. Now he has always liked coffee strong, really strong so he made coffee his way. Fill the filter to the top and fill the water until full (now this would not be quite as strong as OP's coffee) and the coffee was a bit too strong for the senior staff. The question was asked as to who made the coffee and my son said he did and wondered if it was ok as he was drinking the coffee and enjoying his cup of coffee. He was tol
    via MotheroftheworldII
  • ShadowDragon8685 I'm guessing that nobody in that firehouse was ex-Navy, otherwise they would have demanded that only you make it from then on.
    via ShadowDragon8685
  • Cheezburger Image 10485807360
    via Unsplash+ (and Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • dvdmaven Reminds me of a non-coffee drinker in my Nuc class. Everyone was on the rotation, which meant getting to class two hours early. He tried to get out of it because he knew nothing about making coffee, but the Lt told him "Just follow the instruction
    via dvdmaven
  • sheet." Well, it was bad, very, very bad. He followed the instructions, put the correct amount of coffee in the basket and added water to the 150 cup line. The instructions said nothing about dumping out the old grounds and coffee.
    via dvdmaven
  • MistraloysiusMithrax The funny thing to me is out of all the bad ways to make coffee, this is the easiest to fix...just add more water to your cup or the pot if there's room. Good thing he didn't figure out how to one up you on that.
    via MistraloysiusMithrax
  • MacKelvey I had a boss who wanted me to make coffee for the office. I also don't drink coffee. Within a week they bought a Keurig and my only job was to make sure it had water.
    via MacKelvey
  • WaZepplin I was asked to make coffee for a vessel captain one day but not being a coffee drinker I was unsure of the proportions. Not sure what I did wrong but the entire pot was dumped and I was never asked to do it again
    via WaZepplin
  • Nenoshka I did something similar as the newest at my first duty station in the military, but this was way back in the day. We had a huge metal percolator and there was a big basket in the top where you put the coffee grounds. My first day I filled it to the absolute top. This was also the last day I was required to make coffee.
    via Nenoshka
  • Hughley_N_Dowd Oh, this is good. But the secret, really good [insert service here]-station coffee is the coffee that the previous shift brewed. Preferably in one of those big pumpkin pots, a litre at a time.
    via Hughley_N_Dowd
  • Once it has been sitting for 4-6 hours and released all the acids, we get to premium level coffee. Just make sure to undo your belt and zip down the fly in preparation for the sprint to the porcelain throne that you're about to do after having enjoyed the coffee.
    via Hughley_N_Dowd

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firemen blue collar employee tradie fireman working in trades satisfying tradesman malicious compliance fire station trade work blue collar workers blue collar worker story petty revenge young blue collar what goes around comes around entitled people karma pay back senior blue collar justice served entitled r-entitled Reddit blue collar funny karma entitled people firefighters
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