Guy loses over $11k after allowing real estate aunt take over as his agent, closes on the house without her: ‘ma’am, I was your nephew, not your client'

Author image for Elna McHilderson
Elna McHilderson • Managing Editor
Apr 2, 2025 1:00 PM EDT

What are you supposed to do when a family member begs to let them help you out, but, ultimately, in the end, the just end up making things worse? This happens way more than you would expect. It's not easy being the nice family member. You think family is there to help each other out, because you would help any family member out whenever they need. But then when you are the one that requires some assistance, you get the short end of the stick. What is up with that?? Family is supposed to make life easier for you! If not, that is how family trauma develops. And by the amount of people who go to therapy for family trauma, we can assume this kind of act of unkindness happens often within family dynamics. 

 

Take this guy, for instance, who thought his aunt reached out to help him purchase is first home—she is a real estate agent, after all! 

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  • But noooooo! This aunt actually made things worse, much worse. All she did was show up once in crocs to show the place, then the rest of her “help” was sending the wrong paperwork, almost missing the deal, and forcing him to get his own real estate lawyer out-of-pocket. You'd think she would at least make her services discounted for her own nephew. But no to that too! Instead, her commission came out to be $11.5k! What in tarnation… 

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    田
    via Unsplash+ (and Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    "TIFU by saying yes to my aunt and losing $11K"

    This happened a few months ago but I still get stomach cramps when I think about it. I was buying my first home. I had my financing lined up, found a place I loved, and had already spoken to the seller directly. Everything was moving smoothly.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 03
    Then my aunt-who's a part-time real estate agent-found out and said, "Let me take care of it for you. It'll be easier, and I'll make sure you don't get screwed." I didn't even ask for help, but she started calling the seller, forwarding emails, and inserting herself into the whole thing. And of course, she threw in the classic guilt trip: "Don't you trust family?"
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 04
    I figured, whatever. If it makes her happy and it's less stress for me, cool. Nope.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 05
    She completely dropped the ball. Missed an important deadline that nearly lost me the house. Sent me the wrong documents- twice. Didn't explain anything unless I followed up multiple times. I eventually paid out of pocket for a real estate attorney just to make sure I wasn't getting screwed.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 06
    We finally closed. I was just relieved it was over. Then I saw the closing statement. She made $11,500 in commission. For doing... basically nothing. I swear, she showed up to one showing wearing Crocs and sunglasses and spent the rest of the process forwarding emails like a boomer tech support scammer.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 07
    And the kicker? No thank-you. No gift. Just a Facebook post: "So proud of my amazing client for closing on his first home!" Like... ma'am, I was your nephew, not your client. And I basically paid your mortgage for the next three months.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 08
    I've been avoiding family dinners ever since. TL;DR: Let my aunt "help" with my first home purchase out of guilt, she barely did anything, nearly ruined the deal, and walked away with $11.5K
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
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    Edit: A lot of people said the seller usually pays commission, but with the NAR stuff changing, I had to cover it. Fortunately it got rolled into the loan, but that's still $11k out of my pocket. I've decided I'm going to confront my aunt-she's a stone-cold b but whatever. Also got connected
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
  • 10
    with one of the replacerealtors.com founders- they want to use this as a case study for some policy work, so I still got screwed but at least that's pretty cool.
    via Lanky_Armadillo6551
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    Cheezburger Image 10488436992
    via Unsplash+ (and Jaye Haych)
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    rickyh7 My father in law is a real estate agent and he helped us out. Except, he gave us a check with our closing costs at the end sans his reps fee. That's the way you help family. Your aunt is an ah le shame the f out of her, especially since she f ed up so much
    via rickyh7
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    chd_md Agree, when I bought my first house, my girlfriend's father, a real estate lawyer who owns a title and closing company, handled that part of the process and waived all of the fees that he was able to. In this case, your aunt wasn't helping you, you were helping her.
    via chd_md
  • 14
    Far-Bet- Confront her. Shame her infront of your family. MrsNoOne1827 That. Next time you're together you know she's going to bring it up and brag. And when she does, call her out. 'Oh I'm so glad he got a house!'...'Sure if you call scamming me out of $11,500 for doing nothing a sale.'
    via Far-Bet-
  • 15
    sonia72quebec My advice is to never mix family and money. Because when it goes bad, then it's the whole relationship that's gone. My Dad was buying a new car and his brother told him he would buy his old one. They were all supposed to meet at the car dealership to make the transfer. He call him a week before to confirm and he told him he would be there. "No problem". My parents waited one hour for him to show up. He didn't. He called him and he had changed his mind... My Dad never had a relation
    via sonia72quebec
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    LowerEmotion 6062 I'd also report her to her brokerage. I'd file bad reviews everywhere on her. And unless you had a signed agreement for her to represent you I'd file a fraud case against her.
    via LowerEmotion6062
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    GuitahRokkstah Did you sign a contract with your aunt authorizing her to represent you? If not, she is unlikely to have any claim to any of the sale proceeds. If she told the seller's agent where to send her share of the sales proceeds, without a contract to back her right to the funds, it may be possible to have that clawed back. Time to call your lawyer.
    via GuitahRokkstah
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    roenick99 I mean if it's any consolation, the seller usually pays the fees. With all of the changes that have come about recently, I am not sure if that is still the case but it really shouldn't be money out of your pocket. Either way, annoying how she just inserted herself into your transaction like that and didn't really do anything to help the process. You live, you learn. Don't make that mistake again. It's tough to find a good realtor as it is and to have someone you know basically slide in
    via roenick99
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    Roctuplets I would casually ask for half of that money or the cost of the real estate attorney One thing I've learned: Don't censor yourself if you're already at a loss (be it words or actual loss), you're already starting at a disadvantage because she's family
    via Roctuplets
  • 20
    You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by doing this to her at the next family gathering. She did what she did shamelessly, I knew she was angling for earning easy commissions. You got guilted with "don't you trust family" so... don't guilt her in to "thanking family” in kind I am so genuinely serious that I'll come to your family function and do it for you
    via Roctuplets
  • 21
    ripndipp I'd sue your aunt
    via ripndipp

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