Soon-to-be dad tells estranged family to get lost after they try to weasel back into his life solely because he and his wife have a kid on the way: ‘Where were they when I needed them?’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Apr 4, 2025 6:00 AM EDT

When estranged family members try to worm their way back into your life, it's more often than not that the family has ill intentions. Not to be pessimistic, but they decided to cut themselves out of your life, and nothing is preventing them from doing it again.

The sheer privilege estranged family members hold is beyond me, especially when they try to convince others that they simply "made a mistake". Yeah, a years-long mistake that influenced major abandonment issues in those whom they estranged… Thanks, I guess?

Families fall apart all the time. Sometimes they crumble due to moral differences, differing political views, or something as simple as disliking the partner another family member chose to wed. The latter is what's happening in this next story, but now the soon-to-be father who posted it explains that his estranged family wants back into his and his wife's life now that a baby is on the way. No grandparenting privileges for you! Scroll to read.

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  • So, it seems the soon-to-be father's parents didn't want to parent their own son but would be thrilled to grandparent their future grandchild. Maybe they're trying to correct the damage they've sprung onto their kid in his adult life, but they shouldn't get the chance to. If they could abandon their son in the blink of an eye, they can do the same to their grandchild. This father-to-be refuses to let that happen and makes sure his estranged parents and sisters understand that.

  • Cheezburger Image 10488768768
    via Brooke Cagle For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "My selfish parents and siblings are trying to get back in my life just because my wife is pregnant, aita for kicking them out of my home"

    My parents and my siblings cut me off after I got married to my wife, my family was against our marriage and they didn't like my wife back then at all, I tried to convince them but they didn't listen to me.
    via throwWay271661
  • I got married to my wife 2 years ago and I married her without telling my family and I think the only reason why they are trying to get back in our life is because my wife is pregnant.
    via throwWay271661
  • My parents and my sisters showed up at my home and they said they want to make it right by us and be a part of our child's life and we all should move on and forget the past.
    via throwWay271661
  • Cheezburger Image 10488769280
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I asked them where were they when I needed them? They abandoned me and I never even got so much as a text from them in 2 years, they said they were angry and now they want to make it right and came to me to apologise for their behaviour.
    via throwWay271661
  • I kicked them out, I won't lie the revenge was kinda satisfying but my wife is saying that I should maybe try and fix my relation with my family, I should forget the past and be a bit more forgiving.
    via throwWay271661
  • I told her that I hate my family especially my sisters my wife said I should think harder and it's not healthy for our child to live without their grandparents and aunts.
    via throwWay271661
  • Now I am wondering if what I am doing is right? Or am I also being selfish? My wife is a kind soul so she always positive but being too kind is also detrimental.
    via throwWay271661
  • ProfessorDistinct835 This is 100% your call, not your wife's although you should of course listen to her input. NTA either way you go.
    via ProfessorDistinct835
  • Starry-Eyed-Owl INFO: why does your family dislike your wife and why were they against your marriage?
    via Starry-Eyed-Owl
  • throw Way271661 Because my wife is not the kinda a Dil my parents were expecting
    via throwWay271661
  • Rugbylady1982 NTA they'll treat your wife like sh and make her life miserable and ruin her experience as a first time mum, they've showed you who they are before. Don't let them do it again.
    via Rugbylady1982
  • Javaman1960 it's not healthy for our child to live without their grandparents and aunts. It's a LOT more healthy than subjecting kids to TOXIC people.
    via Javaman1960
  • gringaellie NTA it's not healthy to teach a child to love people who will one day cut them off like they're nothing but yesterday's trash.
    via gringaellie
  • DawnShakhar NTA. This is your family and your decision. I'm from the other side of the equation. My husband has a toxic family. After years of urging him to keep in touch with them, I finally realized that I was only hurting him by
    via DawnShakhar
  • forcing him to be exposed to their toxicity. So I'm very sure about this: You know your family, so you should make the decisions about them. And as for it's being unhealthy for the children to be without your relatives again, that is for you to decide. In our case, our children were only hurt by the relationship. -
    via DawnShakhar
  • margotedwarsxx21 NTA. They made their choice when they cut you off. Actions have consequences. Now that they realize they're missing out on something (a grandchild), they suddenly want back in? That's not how relationships work. You're not required to forgive people just because they are ready. They weren't there when you needed them, so why should they get to enjoy the good parts now?
    via marg0tedwarsxx21
  • Hidden_Vixen21 Ask your wife if it's healthy for them to have grandparents who disrespect their mother.
    via Hidden_Vixen21
  • lapsteelguitar If you choose to go forward, meet up with them, just you, for a lunch or something. Get a feeling for what's going on, if they really are sincere or just after a relationship with your child. Do this as many times as it takes for you to settle on an answer. Then bring your wife into things. So... Go slow. NTA
    via lapsteelguitar

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family dynamics family drama aita entitled parents famiies AITAH reddit story family feud parenting family reddit thread estranged Reddit Parenting Fail parents entitled people Parenting FAILS
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