18-year-old daughter tells stepmom to back off trying to be her real “mom,” resulting in tears and her father reprimanding her: “He said I was cruel and should fix it”

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
May 15, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, let us come together in the proud wake of our delirious leaders, our dubious desires, and our deliquescent lovers. Let the heroic words of Cheezcake guide you through thick and thin, through heartbreak and painstakingly trivial day to day banals that we so wish to blanket with the new and exciting. 

Speaking of new and exciting, there's a hot new piece that just came out in family dynamics that's a must read. Although we've all read and reread squabbles about nosy mother in law's, absent fathers, golden children, and heartless stepmothers, this piece really knocks them all out of the park. 

In the story below, the protagonist is a teenage girl who lost her mom when she was young. Her father quickly remarried in the next could years, and she soon had a stepmom. There's nothing inherently wrong in their relationship, other than the fact that the step mother insists on replacing her real mom. Read the full story below for all the juicy details. Oh, and I was bluffing about this story being significant or nascent in excitement. It's utterly mundane!

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my dad's wife that I won't ever call her my mom and she needs to back off?

    "I already had a mom and didn't want another" OR FUTURE
    via Galina Zhigalova / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I (18f) live with my dad and his wife. My mom when I was 5. She was sick for a while and I don't really remember much about the end, but I do remember her when things were still normal. She was really gentle. She'd make up songs for stuff like brushing teeth and putting on socks. My dad didn't talk about her much after she ("--
    via u/lushpixels

  • Everyone who marries into an already established family needs to understand that they can't just replace people in the family. Just because someone has passed doesn't mean that you can just hop in and take their spot. This woman needs to respect her stepdaughter. 

  • 03
    He met his wife when I was 7 and they got married the next year. She was always nice enough. Bought me stuff. Took me places. But from the start she wanted to be "mom" and I never wanted that. I didn't hate her or anything, but I already had a mom and I didn't want
    via u/lushpixels
  • 04
    another one. I told her that when I was 10 and she said I was breaking her heart. I still remember the look on her face.
    via u/lushpixels
  • 05
    Since then we've just coexisted. She calls herself my mom in public and online. She signs birthday cards with "mom." I've never corrected her to her face but I also never call her that. It's always been tense under the surface but we never really talked about it.
    via u/lushpixels
  • 06
    Cheezburger Image 10504679936
    via Eziutka from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 07
    Now that I'm 18, she's been trying to make a big push to "reconnect" before I move out. She keeps bringing up the idea of a "fresh start" and how she wants to be in my life long-term ― at my wedding - someday, when I have kids, all of it.
    via u/lushpixels
  • 08
    I told her I don't want to keep pretending. That she's not my mom and she never will be. That I'll always be polite but I'm not going to fake a relationship that doesn't feel real.
    via u/lushpixels
  • 09
    She cried. My dad didn't say anything at first but later he told me I shouldn't have said that and that she's tried her best for years. That I was cruel and I should fix it.
    via u/lushpixels
  • 10
    I don't know. I don't think I was cruel. I was honest. But maybe it didn't need to be said out loud. AITA?
    via u/lushpixels
  • 11
    Fancy-Meaning-8078 10h ago Her emotions are not your responsibility. Her emotions are valid. As are yours. But she knew the score.
    via u/Fancy-Meaning-8078
  • 12
    She pushed on your boundaries as a child and as a teen. She should be happy you accepted her in your life,
    via u/Fancy-Meaning-8078
  • 13
    You were polite and basically gave her no troubles except for not giving her the title she wanted. You never corrected her on public. You have not embarrassed her. But in the privacy of home you are entitled to correct her, to set the boundary.
    via u/Fancy-Meaning-8078
  • 14
    Maybe you'll grow closer when you get older, Maybe not. She tried her best, She's a good person, She makes your father happy, You never stood in his way to happiness. She wasn't an evil step mother and you weren't a demons spawn
    via u/Fancy-Meaning-8078
  • 15
    to her. You just don't feel deep emotional tye to her. It's the truth. It's not cruel or cold it's just the truth. She should have accepted that.
    via u/Fancy-Meaning-8078
  • 16
    KWS1461 10h ago • Would it be a realistic assessment to tell her you have appreciated her efforts as a step mom? It sounds like she did a lot in your life. You don't ever have to call her mom, but acknowledge her for her contributions.
    via u/KWS1461
  • 17
    CrowMeris 10h ago This is one of those situations that the harder someone pushes the more resistance he/she gets. It's a losing proposition all around.
    via u/CrowMeris
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10504679680
    via aldomurillo from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 19
    It took about five years before my oldest granddaughter started calling her stepfather "Dad" and he very wisely - never brought up the subject himself. He later said that he had always wished that she
    via u/CrowMeris
  • 20
    would someday, but he would have bitten off his own tongue before suggesting it himself, and if it never happened? He's a full grown- a adult and would have accepted it.
    via u/CrowMeris
  • 21
    In blended families (whether the blending is precipitated by death or divorce, it doesn't matter) the adults are responsible for being, you know, ADULTS and for letting children adjust in their own time and at their own pace
    via u/CrowMeris
  • 22
    and if it happens, fine. If it doesn't, well then that's fine, too. Adults need to deal. Edited to add: NTA
    via u/CrowMeris
  • 23
    cannigjars • 8h ago I had 5 step kids. They would call me step mom choking on the word mom. I sat them down one afternoon and told them that as an English teacher I had yet to come across a piece of literature
    via u/cannigjars
  • 24
    where the stepmother was nice, and I would appreciate it if they didn't call me stepmother. I would much rather be called their dad's wife or by my first name.. Can I tell you the looks on their face were so beautiful And for the first time I got hugs and they were perfect angels from that moment on. I totally
    via u/cannigjars
  • 25
    recommend using either bonus mom or dad's wife —- some word other than step mom please. ( kids were 21, 16, 15, 13, 10) All girls but the 10 year old.
    via u/cannigjars

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family drama stepmother drama toxic family feud relationships parenting lol love family reddit thread Reddit funny dating
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