26-year-old demands that 33-year-old boyfriend give up video games completely despite only playing 2 hours a week, he stops for a month before standing his ground: "I'm not asking to play for 10 hours a day"

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  • 01

    AITAH for not wanting to give up video games for my GF?

    "I'm not asking to play for 10 hours a day"
  • 02
    | 33M just started a relationship with someone 26F and one thing we disagree on is me playing 2 hours of video games a week. She refuses to continue the relationship unless I stop playing video games completely.
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    Before you say anything, yes I know it is a childish hobby of mine. But that is exactly why I need it in my life. I have alot on my shoulders with work/family
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    issues/health issues that I don't want to give too much detail about so I can remain anonymous. The one thing that helps my mental health and allows me to destress is playing a game for 2 hours a week
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    - where I can forget about the million responsibilities that I have and just relax my mind.
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    I am not asking to play for 10 hours a day, just a few hours a week after she falls asleep. Her issue with it is that she wants 100% of my free time.
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    I gave it up for a month now and my mental health has gone downhill.
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    Am I the a hole here for wanting to stand my ground and lose the relationship over a few hours of game time?
  • 11
    peakpenguins Before you say anything, yes I know it is a childish hobby of mine Why is it any more childish than watching TV or a movie or tiktok or playing a game on your phone or browsing social media? It's not.
  • 12
    If she can't handle you spending 2 hours a week on a perfectly normal hobby, then that's her problem. NTA. Her issue with it is that she wants 100% of my free time. Big, big, big red flag.
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    Background-Signal-10 If someone gave me this ultimatum they would be out of my life. Seems like a power play. Plus playing videos games isn't childish. There are plenty of games that tell great stories.
  • 14
    peakpenguins There are plenty of games that tell great stories. I wonder how many of these people are like "ew, video games are childish... lets watch The Last Of Us"
  • 15
    XiTzCriZx playing videos games isn't childish. The funny thing is, some of the most popular games are rated M for Mature, meaning the games themselves are targeted to adults, there's just as load of awful parents who let their 10 year old play GTA.
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    kaldaka16 Video games aren't a childish hobby and also I couldn't give less of a sh if they were, everyone deserves time for a hobby they enjoy. Two hours a week is so low too when there's no kids involved!
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    With really young kids I could see each parent only getting two hours a week of individual time and also that's important then!
  • 18
    With no kids there should be plenty of individual/ hobby time for each person.
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    NoBath8924 Seconding this, it is not a childish hobby. Even if it was a childish hobby (idk blowing bubbles two hours a week) if it makes you happy you should do it. You should be with someone who wants you to be happy and then also HELPS you be happy. I wish you a speedy escape.
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    AgencyNo758 NTA. Wanting a couple hours a week for something that helps your mental health isn't selfish it's healthy. A partner demanding 100% of your free time and dismissing your needs is a red flag not a compromise.
  • 21
    Dramatic-Ant-9364 Stand your ground. She is overly-controlling
  • 22
    Then Drink1894 She needs to respect your need for personal time. Relationships should allow individual interests.
  • 23
    mongoosedog12 Exactly. It's not like it' consuming every aspect of his life. If he can be a functioning adult and continue to be present in the relationship none of it should matter
  • 24
    Also she's 26 and seems like that is a hard line for some women of that age group. Not saying that as a "she's too young for you" thing but I have cousins that age and this sentiment towards video games seems to be common
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    My cousins have asked how I felt about it (I'm OP's age) and it's very much "as long as he can be a functioning adult and it's not controlling his life"
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    They then assume it's because I also play video games so it's different. But I don't get the difference between playing video games and like watching Love island (which I also do) lol it's a hobby you don't get to decide what's "bad" and what's not
  • 28
    She's made her choice and she's free to make it. She doesn't want a man who plays video games. She can find one. ΝΤΑ
  • 29
    Adelucas I'm 61 and play a lot more than 2 hours a week. We all have hobbies, the trick is not to let them rule our life. I go to work, I socialise, I walk the dogs, I clean the house. And I play video games. It's that or watch TV of an evening and there's very little these days I'm interested in.
  • 30
    There is a certain breed of people who think a certain way, and everyone has to think the same way as them. This woman has just entered your life and she's already trying to control something you enjoy, and barely spend any time doing. I bet she's always on her phone though.
  • 31
    She's already showing red flags this early into the relationship. Pay attention and dump her.

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