"I didn't know I'd be married to a ghost": Woman consistently sleeps at sisters place, husband demands she come, she called him controlling

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Jun 30, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, welcome. When one gets married, there are so many expectations that both parties have, but they could differ greatly. There's no automatic way to go about the hardships in the relationship without communication. Both people need to agree to how they want to be loved, treated, and talked to. 


It's the age of love languages, and knowing your partner's love language is one of the most important parts of being in a relationship. 
 

In the story below, the protagonist complains that his wife is never home. He paints a dismal picture of him coming home to a dark, lonely, and empty house, having dinner alone, all the while his wife is at her sister's. Maybe it's infidelity trauma, but my first thought would be that she's not at her sister's, but rather with a man. And beyond love languages, it's just absolutely bizarre to not want to spend that time with your husband. Nights in a row that she's not there? 

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  • 01

    AITAH for telling my wife to stay in our own home instead of sleeping at her sister’s all the Time?

    Cheezburger Image 10523421952
    via Volodymyr Melnyk / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I don't even know where to start. I'm tired. Like... soul deep tired. Every night, I get home from work exhausted, sweaty, starving and guess what? I open the door to a
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604

  • This has to be one of the weirdest stories I've read yet. There are too many possibilities for why she sleeps at her sister's home so often. The obvious one is that she hates her husband so much that she can't stand to be with him at all. Another is that she is cheating and using her sister as an excuse. Read the full story below. 

  • 03
    quiet, dark house. No wife. No dinner. No note. Just me and the same cold silence. She's always at her sister's. Like, always. Not just visiting for a few hours sleeping
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 04
    there. Most nights of the week. Sometimes I don't see her for two, three nights straight. She says it's "just more comfortable there" or "she's used to it" or "her
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 05
    sister needs company." But what about me? I didn't marry her just to live alone like a bachelor again. What's the point of having a wife
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 06
    if I'm eating instant noodles in silence every night while she's out there acting like she's still single or like her sister is her actual
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 07
    Cheezburger Image 10523421184
    via AleksandarNakic from Getty Images Signature / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 08
    partner? I finally snapped. I told her straight: Can you please stay home? This is our house. I come home to no one. It's starting to
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 09
    feel like I'm not even married. She didn't yell. She just looked at me and said, "You know how close I am with my sister. You knew this before we got married." And
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 10
    yeah. I did know they were close. But I didn't think I'd be married to a ghost. Now she's mad at me for "controlling her." Her sister even
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 11
    sent me a long a message about how I'm "isolating" her and "being insecure." But I swear to God, all I'm asking for is a wife who actually lives with me.
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 12
    Who I can talk to at night. Eat with. Wake up next to. Isn't that what marriage is supposed to be? She says I'm selfish. But is it really selfish to want your partner to come home? AITA?
    via u/Both-Tangelo-3604
  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 10523421696
    via Rido / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 14
    sharkieshadooontt How much more time are you going to waste
    via u/sharkieshadooontt
  • 15
    PartyHearing Honestly, it sounds like she has a codependent relationship with her sister, from what OP is saying. I
    via u/PartyHearing
  • 16
    don't think this is a situation OP fixes themselves. It sounds like therapy is in order. If their wife isn't down with that, make the hard
    via u/PartyHearing
  • 17
    choice. I don't know how old OP is but they shouldn't spend their life alone because their spouse is codependent with their sister
    via u/PartyHearing
  • 18
    RandomReddit9791 You don't have a marriage and your wife isn't interested in maintaining the
    via u/RandomReddit9791
  • 19
    relationship. She doesn't care. Accept that you're essentially single and get a divorce.
    via u/RandomReddit9791
  • 20
    dro... NTA. Wanting your spouse to come home and actually live with you is not controlling, it's the bare
    via u/drowningmisery
  • 21
    minimum expectation of a marriage. You're not demanding she cut off contact with her sister, you're asking her to spend
    via u/drowningmisery
  • 22
    time in her own home, with her husband. That's not selfish that's normal.
    via u/drowningmisery
  • 23
    She's effectively abandoned. the partnership and is putting her sister's emotional needs above yours on a consistent, prolonged basis. That's not
    via u/drowningmisery
  • 24
    just "being close with family," that's neglecting your relationship. If the roles were reversed and a husband stayed at his
    via u/drowningmisery
  • 25
    brother's house five nights a week while the wife came home to an empty house, people would be flipping tables.
    via u/drowningmisery

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family drama marriage drama toxic unhealthy relationships lol love family reddit thread Reddit funny dating
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