Husband tries to take solo vacation while wife juggles working full-time and 3 kids, so she shuts him down: 'It's about mutual respect'

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Jul 20, 2025 2:00 PM EDT

Raising young kids is a full-time job in itself. So if you add a 9-to-5 on top of that, and it's a wonder any parent doesn't have a full-blown Brittney Spears meltdown. From daycare drop-offs to late-night wakeups, the grind is real. And when you've got multiple kids, including two babies under 1? I truly cannot imagine. It's exhausting, expensive, and nonstop. Daycare alone can cost as much as a second rent check, and coverage gaps in the summer only add to the stress.

Luckily for this couple, the husband works as a teacher and has summers off which is a huge perk for families with little ones. My mom was a teacher too, so growing up, we had the same setup. While some of my friends were shuttled to summer camps or spent the day with nannies, my mom was there, running the show and keeping us alive (and fed, and moderately entertained).

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  • But in this situation, the teacher-dad seems to be over summer break already. Just a few weeks in, he’s asking for a solo vacation… again. This mom wasn't about to let that slide.

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  • AITA: I said no to my husband taking a solo trip

    AITA? I am a mom of 3 - a 7 year old girl and 8 month old twin boys. I work a 9-5 corporate job. My husband is a teacher and obviously has summers off. Last
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  • summer, while I was pregnant, I let my husband go on a solo trip to the Bahamas. I travel for work and he felt like it was unfair that I get away so much. I let him do it last year. He has also
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  • CIKIS EXIT CIKIS EXIT
    via Tahir osman For Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • been talking about going to World Cup games in 2026 with my brother in law in Mexico, the US and Canada, which I am being supportive of because he loves soccer. A few days ago he got it in his head. that he wants to do
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  • another solo trip this summer because he's off and sick of just sitting around with the babies. We only have part time care for the boys at the moment (daughter is in full day camp) to save money because he's off.
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  • Well now I'm all of a sudden the bad guy because he wants to run off on another solo trip sometime in the next 3 weeks and I shut it down (I actually gave him the finger as my response - but I jokingly tell him to F
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  • off all the time and he takes it well). I'm working, we don't have full time child care, and it's honestly just a lot with the 3 kids. He has now turned it into me being the bad guy and all of a sudden he's furious at me. AITA?
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  • ETA I have not traveled for business since having the twins. I have only been back at work for 6 weeks and have declined 2 travel opportunities already because I felt it. wasn't the right timing yet. I have no travel
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  • booked at this time but that will change in the coming months. I had one girls weekend away since the twins and offered for my husband to have a guys weekend. I even asked my brother in law
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  • to reach out with him to arrange it because I felt bad that I left him with the 3 kids for a weekend. As for the "let" him part - it's not about being a parent or controlling what he does - it's about a mutual respect. That we
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  • respect each other enough to make sure the other one is comfortable - especially because we have two babies that need a lot of hands on care and are not yet sleeping through the night. I wouldn't just plan
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  • a trip without checking in with him and he does the same. Also ETA that he's a great father and super hands on the vast majority of the time.
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  • Possible-Tip-3544 How many solo breaks do you get?
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  • Thick_Pie7116 you're not the bad guy. your husband already had his solitary trip last year and now he wants another one with 8 month old twins and you're working? on top
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  • of that without full-time childcare. he's just joking. he prioritized his boredom over your exhaustion. if he wants to escape so badly, let him wait for the 2026
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  • world cup or hire a nanny himself. don't give in. taking care of triplets is not a summer hobby
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  • avid-learner-bot NTA. It's understandable, really, for him to want a break, we all need time out sometimes. But expecting you to handle everything solo with three young'uns?
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  • That's not on, love. Have you thought about maybe planning a family getaway instead?
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  • tootbrun tl;dr Did he say he was going to a Coldplay concert?
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  • RedGreenPyro Does he like having family or...?
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  • SenpaiSigh You've got three kids, limited childcare, a full- time job, and he's mad he can't bounce for another solo vacation? Its not summer break from responsibility
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  • Purplemel75 He's the AH, leaving you working full time with 3 little ones and no support. Sorry girl, he needs a good talking to!!
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  • WishieWashie12 Tell him he can take a trip without you, provided he takes all 3 kids.
    via WishieWashie12

Tags

Babies family drama kids motherhood parenting couples dad Travel new mom twins mom marriage problems solo trip
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