18-year-old only child cuts off parents because they prioritized their disorderly foster kids over their own son: 'My extended family told me it was disgusting to turn my back on my parents'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jul 31, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

You know when you go on an airplane, and the safety instructions tell you to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others? That is not only important advice for flying, but also for life in general. You can't properly help somebody out if you can't breathe and function on your own! There's a reason there's a stigma against teen parenting: teenagers can barely take care of themselves, and many of them can't take care of themselves. Giving them the responsibility of taking care of a baby is usually not setting them up for success. You can only handle what you can handle, and while it can be beneficial to push yourself and take on extra responsibilities, it doesn't always work out, and that's okay! As long as you know when enough is enough and when you need to quit something, going the extra mile is not a crime.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01

    My extended family think I'm a monster for going no contact with my parents AITA?

    I'm (18m) my parents only bio kid. They wanted more but they couldn't have more. So when I was 6 they decided they were going to foster kids with the hope that some would become eligible for adoption in the future. All they told me initially was I would have a load of other kids to play with so I thought that sounded
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930

  • The parents in this story did not know when to quit, and it cost them their relationship with their son. They spent years putting him in precarious situations when they fostered kids from bad backgrounds, and they never cared when it hurt him physically or emotionally. Now that he's 18, he doesn't want anything to do with them.

  • 02
    really great. But then they really pressured me to say I wanted them to foster and I was on board no matter what. The change happened because they were assigned a case/social worker (not sure the difference really) and I would be interviewed alongside them.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 03
    Something I learned a few years ago is that most people who sign up to foster will say if there are certain needs they can't meet so kids can have better placements. My parents were open for any/all kids with all kinds of behavioral issues if needed. So not once did they think of me.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10536656896
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 05
    Because my parents were open for any kids, we sometimes had really traumatized kids who were violent or some who were so angry at the world that they were violent.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 06
    I was attacked a lot. I had kids punch and kick me, bite me, choke hold me, burn me and all kinds of things. My parents refused to get me a lock for my door and when I made a makeshift door stop they took that away once they found it.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 07
    Whenever I spoke negatively about the fostering experience my parents would tell me if I ruined it for those kids and them then I would be a selfish little ah_le and did I really think my life was worse than those kids who had been abused and so much worse. They said this even
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 08
    after one of the foster kids lost their sh and beat me hard enough leave bruises all over my face and body. It was summer so they could hide me until they went away.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 09
    I had to walk on eggshells depending on who was in the house. There were times it wasn't as terrible and the kids were okay but I struggled to want any of them around because of how crappy the experience as a whole was. And I was talked to every few months by the case/social worker but my parents had me afraid to speak up.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 10
    Cheezburger Image 10536657408
    via Ellery Sterling

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 11
    None of the kids they got were ever free for adoption so they never adopted any of the kids they fostered. None ever stayed forever either. I was relieved and they knew it. So they would get mad at me every time I was glad to see the kids go home or somewhere else.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 12
    A couple of times it was suggested that I get therapy by the case/social worker and my parents never took that seriously. Their foster kids got all the therapy they needed and my parents were so devoted to doing the best for them. But it was like
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 13
    f I our bio kid and his needs. I think sometimes it was their way of punishing me for being their only.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 14
    I turned 18 back in March and I moved out of my parents house and went to stay with a friend and his family. I was there until a couple of weeks ago and now I'm in another state waiting for college to start. Since March I haven't spoken to my parents
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 15
    once. But a few times I spoke to extended family and they asked. why I'm not talking to my parents, I told them I was no contact and they told me it was disgusting to turn my back on my parents.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 16
    Some asked me why and I told them. But then it was like unilaterally decided that I'm a monster for holding my parents kindness for other kids against them. I asked why they wanted me to have contact so bad if I'm a monster and they told me my parents are my parents and even if they made mistakes I need to
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 17
    forgive them and that I shouldn't be so quick to throw away my family. They even say it's my age and everyone young these days is so ready to throw away their whole entire family over every small thing. AITA?
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10536649728
    via Adolfo Félix (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 19
    ChanterelleOh You were abused and neglected while your parents played saviors to others. That's not "kindness", it's performative at best and cruel at worst. You're not a monster for protecting yourself, going no contact is a valid and often necessary choice
    via u/ChanterelleOh
  • 20
    Fantastic_Spring_542 "performative at best and cruel at worst" - nailed it their definition of "family" sounds twisted af
    via u/Fantastic_Spring_542
  • 21
    Evening-Penalty-7036 Exactly. If that's their idea of "family," no wonder people are walking away from it. You can't slap a label on something and expect it to mean loyalty or love when there's none of that behind it. Sounds like they just want control, not connection.
    via u/Evening-Penalty-7036
  • 22
    BlueDiamondBoo Your parents were bad parents. End of story. You as a child didn't deserve to be hurt, the children doing it, didn't deserve to be hurt. Your parents inability to protect you, is the same reason why the foster children were removed from their homes.
    via u/BlueDiamondBoo
  • 23
    Just because you share DNA doesn't make you family, it makes you related. Family is who you choose to share your life with. Family is there for you, protects you, understands, supports and stand by you even when they don't agree with you. When you find your family, the relatives will be angry but it won't matter to you anymore.
    via u/BlueDiamondBoo
  • 24
    AdvertisingLow9930 OP I tried to argue that with my parents once (same reason the kids were removed) and they told me it was evil to compare kids lashing out to kids being abused by their parents or guardians. And then I gave up.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 25
    I think I'm like mostly there with it not mattering how mad my extended family are because it's only a small part of me that is like are they right. The rest of me knows I did the right thing.
    via u/AdvertisingLow9930
  • 26
    Glittering-Sugar-07 NTA, your extended family are monsters for enabling abusers. DO NOT FORGIVE YOUR BIO PARENTS. DO NOT KEEP THE PEACE. Cut ties with everyone in your family, go NC with all of them, and stay with your friend. You clearly don't matter to your extended family
    via u/Glittering-Sugar-07

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

foster kid family drama foster care only child mother bad parenting reddit story bad parents parenting dad family mom Parenting Fail son Father Parenting FAILS
Scroll Down For The Next Article