Newborn grandson barred from Thanksgiving dinner because grandma's new boyfriend “doesn't like kids,” suggests getting a sitter instead of hosting a baby: ‘I feel betrayed that my mom would prioritize this guy over her grandchild’

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Aug 29, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

The first holiday season with a new baby is supposed to feel magical, at least for the parents; the baby might actually be a little discombobulated by all of the crazy new sounds, sights, smells, and tastes. This last December, I got to celebrate my baby cousin's first Christmas with him. He was only 6 months old at the time, wearing an elf costume, and drooling happily while we passed him around like a hot potato. Nobody cared that he cried a little during dinner or that his parents had to bow out a little earlier than usual. Honestly, having him around made the evening better because instead of getting into squabbles, we all just gushed over how cute he looked in his jingly little elf hat. 

That's the sort of experience this new mom wanted to have with her 7-month old daughter on Thanksgiving at her mom's house. Except she ends up finding out over a phone call that her baby is not welcome. Turns out that grandma's new boyfriend of less than a year "doesn't like kids" and doesn't want a baby "ruining dinner." Instead of standing up for her granddaughter, she actually suggests that her daughter find a sitter and come celebrate without the baby. When she refuses, she is accused of putting the baby "before family." That left everyone – me, our narrator, the internet, even the baby – wondering exactly what constitutes as "family" to this lady if not her literal newborn granddaughter.

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  • 01

    My mom told me i can't bring my baby to thanksgiving because her boyfriend "doesn't like kids"

    A Thanksgiving feast
    via Liliboas from Getty Images Signature

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    I (25F) had my daughter 7 months ago. This will be her first holiday season, and I was really excited to bring her to
    via u/LooseUniversity6157
  • 03
    Thanksgiving at my mom's house. But last week, my mom called me and said her boyfriend (who she's been dating for less than a year btw) "doesn't like
    via u/LooseUniversity6157
  • 04
    kids" and doesn't want a baby "ruining the dinner." My mom actually suggested I find a babysitter so I could still come,
    via u/LooseUniversity6157
  • 05
    without my own baby. I told her absolutely not. Now she's upset and saying I'm "choosing my baby over family" which... yeah?
    via u/LooseUniversity6157
  • 06
    An infant in a striped, yellow onesie surrounded by pumpkins and leaves
    via pixelshot

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 07
    She's my family! I feel so betrayed that my mom would prioritize this guy over her grandchild.
    via u/LooseUniversity6157
  • 08
    Mmoct Omg this can't be real, if it is your mom is a real piece of work. She's choosing a man over her daughter and grandchild. Seriously I would go low contact
    via u/Mmoct
  • 09
    LovelyCoffee_Marley I would go no contact till she ditched the guy. She is the one picking some over family.
    via u/LovelyCoffee_Marley
  • 10
    An older couple embrace and smile by the sea
    via Monkey Business Images

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 11
    My sadness would be masked by being p ed off. My child and I would have no contact till she broke up with him. If for
    via u/LovelyCoffee_Marley
  • 12
    some reason she married the guy than we would become estranged and i would no longer constister my mother family.
    via u/LovelyCoffee_Marley

  • The holiday dinner is taking place at grandma's house, so why does her boyfriend of less than a year get a say on the guest list? 

  • 13
    the-TARDIS-ran-away She's choosing her boyfriend over family? What planet is she on?
    via u/the-TARDIS-ran-away
  • 14
    Noisy_Valley577 Totally! That's insane like, her own grandbaby comes first. A boyfriend shouldn't be making rules about family gatherings.
    via u/Noisy_Valley577
  • 15
    TA8375 Boyfriend should be the one uninvited.
    via u/TA8375
  • 16
    No_Appointment_7232 "OK, that's a great reason for us to start our own traditions. Have a lovely holiday. And your boyfriend doesn't fit in our celebration."
    via u/No_Appointment_7232
  • 17
    Then Do Not Respond To Another question or comment from anyone.
    via u/No_Appointment_7232
  • 18
    Revolutionary_Job726 Someone is choosing a baby over family, and it's not you!
    via u/Revolutionary_Job726
  • 19
    MissMurderpants So yeah, time to start planning ALL holidays without your mother.
    via u/MissMurderpants

  • It's definitely time for this mom to start a new holiday tradition that does not include her own mother. 

  • 20
    I'm serious Op. if this is real you just tell your mom ok and plan your own family traditions for now on.
    via u/MissMurderpants
  • 21
    Channel your anger into creating lasting memories with whomever YOU want over.
    via u/MissMurderpants
  • 22
    Face2098 I would make sure EVERYONE knew what she said. Then I would have a nice holiday at home.
    via u/Face2098
  • 23
    surrounded-by-morons It would be awesome if she told everyone what went down and they all went to Thanksgiving at OP's house and ghost Mom. That way on Thanksgiving day she's all confused why it is just her and the boyfriend.
    via u/surrounded-by-morons
  • 24
    A family eating dinner ona balcony
    via AleksandarNakic from Getty Images Signature

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 25
    Previous_Praline_373 Time for you to start hosting your own holidays is definitely go low to no contact for a while
    via u/Previous_Praline_373
  • 26
    mi_nombre_es_ricardo Sounds like good enough reason to stop having a relationship with her. She obviously doesn't even consider your daughter family.
    via u/mi_nombre_es_ricardo
  • 27
    for context, my mom probably wouldn't let me through the door if I don't bring my children along to dinner. And my step-dad is more of a grandfather than my real dad ever was.
    via u/mi_nombre_es_ricardo

Tags

boyfriend relationship advice family drama baby mother adulting grandma relationships parenting girlfriend adulthood family daughter parents dating
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