'No way I'm letting them near my son': Pregnant woman considers cutting off parents-in-law, after they showed no excitement about baby, “failed” to send baby shower invites to their side of the family, and planned a trip abroad over baby’s due date

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Oct 6, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Becoming a first-time grandparent is usually met with overwhelming excitement. Tiny baby shoes, pushing swings to reach the stars, and spoiling the little ones with sweets their parents swore were off-limits. Sounds perfect, right? Well, apparently not for these in-laws.

After a young couple joyfully announced their pregnancy, the soon-to-be mother was met with a reaction she never saw coming from her husband's parents: zero enthusiasm. Her mother-in-law "forgot" to send baby shower invitations to their side of the family, and to top it all off, they even booked a vacation right around the baby's due date. These are not the kind of grandparents she wants around her newborn son. So rather than endure more coldness and drama, she's now considering cutting them off completely. But will her husband be willing to go that far, and 'ghost' his own parents?

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  • Whether they are ready to be grandparents or not, the least they could do is show their children some excitement. They may have gotten married younger than their parents wished, but they cannot wait for the arrival of their baby boy. The only thing that would make it even better is if that support extended beyond the two of them. Having children is not easy, and we're almost certain that they are going to want their little boy to feel adored by not only themselves but his grandparents, too. 

  • Pregnant couple
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITAH for wanting to cut off my in-laws before my baby arrives?

    There's a lot of backstory that would take a while, but my MIL is one of those boy moms who are in love with their sons (she has 4 boys) and hates the woman they marry.
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  • I(24f) married the youngest son (24m) last year when we were 23, and they have been horrible ever since.
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  • I have 2 older SILS and they basically prepared me for this while we were planning the wedding.
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  • Now we are 8 months pregnant with our first and their first baby. I've heard through the other kids that they are upset that we are "moving too fast, too young, it should have been one of the older siblings first, etc" and when I announced our pregnancy with a cute little surprise Easter basket at Easter, they did not congratulate us and instead said to my SIL that "she needs to wait a while because she is not ready to be a grandma".
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  • FIL told me to watch my weight while I'm pregnant. Texted her friends a photo of my announcement basket saying she was goo if to be a grandma!
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  • But said nothing to us. Mind you, they had their first two sons before the ages of 24, so kind of hypocritical calling us too young.
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  • It's wild. My husband and I have almost begged them to act excited at this point and I'm over it.
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  • Jealous mother-in-law
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Refused to share our Facebook announcement to family so some didn't know for months. They begrudgingly offered to do food at the shared baby shower with my family but didn't send out the invites to their side of the family, so none of them were there (did not give a reason as to why when I was shocked nobody showed up).
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  • Just said "I must not have gotten to it after we designed them" I helped her design them on canva one day as she insisted she send out paper invites (but then never sent them out).
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  • I even gave her envelopes and stamps to use. Their friends have said "oh your parents must be so excited to become grandparents!" Awkward crickets.
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  • They walk away or say "sure" and change the subject. Today I learned that they plan on traveling out of the country for Thanksgiving (the week before our baby is due) and "don't care if the baby is born while they are gone".
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  • No way am I letting them near my son when they come back due to being on a plane/traveling out of country/ on top of it being cold/flu/rsv season.
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  • How on earth do we get over this? I can't wrap my head around a mother and father not wanting to be involved with a first grandson being born, so far as to leave the country at the due date.
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  • Senior couple going down escalator
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • My husband thinks cutting them off is going too far- however I don't want them to meet my son if the drive home every time we see them ends in tears.
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  • We already only see them 2-3 times a year for holidays/weddings/etc. AITAH?
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  • RevolutionaryDiet686 They have shown you who they are so accept it. Don't try to change them and don't have any expectation of a happy little hallmark family. If you are having a party make sure you and husband take charge of invites so his family does not get excluded. It's okay that they are traveling when baby is due. Honestly the less people around a newborn is a good idea.
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  • TeacupCollector2011 If you only see them 2-3 times a year, then just ignore them the rest of the time and live your life. If they contact you, be polite and that's it. Stop letting them know that it bothers you. It's their loss.
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  • Bubbly Chicken_9358 NTA, but you are trying to prevent something, and I think that cutting them off should be in response to something, if that makes sense? My parents were not excited to be grandparents at all, until my oldest was born. Then they were the most excited
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  • grandparents on the planet. Sometimes it takes seeing the baby to do that. They might (maybe) turn out to be the most excited, helpful grandparents ever. If not, you can revisit going NC due to their actual behaviors rather than their lack of excitement.
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  • Ok-Heron8017 Don't cut them off, but stop investing so much into his parents. They aren't excited. Ok, fine, stop trying to get them excited or involved. He can share any news he wants to share, or not, and if they ask you can respond, but stop. pushing. You are putting too much on what you want from them, it's not going to happen, let it go and just enjoy the pregnancy.
    via Ok-Heron8017
  • Quiet-Hamster6509 Stop focusing on people who dont want to be involved, that is their choice and they're entitled to it. Focus on your baby and the family you and your husband are starting.
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  • Groovy YaYa Don't let yourself be the bad guy - they are pushing themselves out. Do NOT make any effort with them and never ever making them responsible for your communication with the extended family. Get those addresses yourselves for birth announcements, Christmas cards, etc.
    via GroovyYaYa
  • The only thing you put your foot down with is you tell your husband that they cannot be around the kiddo without an RSV vaccination and if they've been traveling, they wear a mask or they meet kiddo outside, etc. No coming by unannounced. Then communication happens through him. Why are you bothered by them traveling when baby is born? That is a BONUS!!
    via GroovyYaYa

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invitation baby pregnancy announcement siblings parent in laws travelling due date in laws mother in law excitement grandparents pregnant young daughter-in-law disappointing soon-to-be
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