Wife demands husband limit free time with nehpews after daughters start feeling left behind: 'I never said they weren't good kids'

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Nov 12, 2025 2:00 PM EST

One-on-one time with my parents always felt so special as a kid. They didn't even have to plan anything super involved with me to make is feel important, either. I had my own little rituals with each parent; with my dad, we'd always go to IHOP since my mom wasn't too big on pancakes. And with my mom, we'd go window shopping at the mall. Sometimes she'd buy me something, but she taught me to enjoy perusing. These moments felt so important because it was just me and my parent with no distractions or competition.

But sometimes things aren't so straightforward. It's easy to assume that more kids equal more fun, but anyone who's seen a group of cousins together knows it can quickly turn into a full-blown competition rather than playtime. In this story, one mom found herself torn between empathy for her husband's nephews whose dad is often away for military service and her daughters, who just want to enjoy their dad's attention without feeling like they're in a soccer championship.

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  • 01

    AITA for asking my husband to limit his time with his nephews because our daughters are missing out?

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  • 02
    Hi, I had an issue yesterday with my husband which Im conflicted about, regarding whether I was in the wrong.
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 03
    My husband and I have two daughters, 6 and 8. My SIL and her family live a couple of blocks away
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  • 04
    from us. They have two boys, both 9 years old. Her husband is in the army so he is away from home a lot.
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 05
    When he's away, the boys come to our house often. Theyre great boys, respectful and energetic. When
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 06
    they're here my husband takes them to the park to play soccer. They always say they have a great time and my SIL also thanks us for it.
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  • 07
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  • 08
    When they're not around, my husband takes our daughters to the park too, I often join them too, and they also look forward to it. However,
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 09
    when my husband takes the boys along, even though we encourage our girls to go along they told me they don't enjoy it, basically the boys get
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  • 10
    super competitive and it's not fun the way it is when its just them with my husband. I take them along by myself but apparently its not as much fun
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  • 11
    hahaa. My husband can also only do some days of the week and when their father's away the boys come on those days.
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 12
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  • 13
    Yesterday, I asked my husband to talk to his sister and set some kind of limit to those days because our daughters like going to the park with him for
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  • 14
    soccer and its not the same with me or when they go with him and the boys. He looked taken aback and said that they're good kids, theirs dad's
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  • 15
    away for long stretches and they seem to have fun here. I said I never said they werent good kids, just that our daughters felt like they were missing out. He said he'll encourage
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  • 16
    them more to come with them and he'll make sure things dont get too competitive, I said we've gone through that before and its just not
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  • 17
    fun for them. He said telling his nephews this would be cruel, and made it sound like I was an AH for suggesting it. So I wanted to ask AITA?
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  • 18
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  • 19
    Update: Since today was a holiday he was going to let his sister know that he'd be taking the kids to the park earlier today so the boys should
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  • 20
    come earlier. I asked my older daughter separately whether she wanted to go. She said no, even though she'd been hyped for it in the morning. I told my husband this.
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 21
    While she was cuddling with him he asked her why she didn't want to come, but she was avoiding giving a reason. Eventually my husband asked if it was because she didn't like
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  • 22
    playing soccer anymore, she said no she did. Then he brought up whether it was because of the cousins and she shyly admitted that yes but didn't give the details that she'd given me
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  • 23
    about the competitive nature and everything. My husband hadn't texted his sister yet, so he told the girls, the boys can't join right now and if they
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  • 24
    still wanted to go to the park, we could all go. Both my daughters suddenly really wanted to go and went to get dressed. So we're at the
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  • 25
    park now and the girls are having fun with him. I think he's going to take the boys later in the evening, I'm not sure. But my daughter telling him seems to have made more of an impact than me saying did.
    via u/Reasonable_Vast2576
  • 26
    wesmorgan1 Your husband needs to understand that he can't be all things to all people - and that his kids need to come first. That doesn't mean that he can't spend time with his nephews; it just means that he has to learn to divide his time.
    via u/wesmorgan1

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relationship advice family drama married with children wife married life relationships parenting husband couples family daughter Parenting Fail parents
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