30-year-old steals $2000 from her sister for her cat's funeral after she asked her to scale down the budget: 'She claimed it was an emotional emergency.'

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    Woman carrying a cat while standing on a porch
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    Am I the bad guy for refusing to pay for my sister’s “pet funeral” after she used MY money without asking?

    My sister (30F) lives with me temporarily while she "gets back on her feet." She pays a small amount in rent and buys her own food, but I cover the majority of the bills.
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    Last month, her elderly cat passed away. She was devastated, and I get it, it's sad. But she immediately started planning a full pet funeral: cremation, custom urn, memorial service, catering... the whole thing.
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    A wooden table topped with candles and flowers
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    She told me it was going to cost around $2,000. I said, "That's a lot, maybe scale it back?" She said she'd handle it.
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    Well... turns out she "handled it" by using MY credit card that she had access to for emergencies. She claimed it was an "emotional emergency." I was furious and told her she needed to pay me back. She said:
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    "I can't. And honestly, he was family. I thought you'd understand." I canceled her copy of the card and told her she has 3 months to pay it back or she's moving out.
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    A pile of cardboard boxes sitting on top of a hard wood floor
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    Now she's telling everyone I'm “heartless” for prioritizing money over her grief. AITJ?
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    Ok-Listen-8519 NTA she stole from you
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    1acre64 Exactly. What she did is called "theft"
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    qwrsr NTJ. She know you wasn't with that and instead of toning it down she went to be sneaky. She better pay up within 3 months or toodle loo.
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    DMargaretfootgoddess Okay, you're doing her a favor by giving her a place to stay and you get her a favor by letting her have a card of yours for emergencies. When she planned the funeral you said you need to scale it back. You knew you were going to end up paying for it and instead she said she'd take care of it and taking care of it was going behind your back and using your credit card which I'm sorry. But realistically you know you're going to have to pay off and you're going to pay interest
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    Yeah okay. Where do I start? You are creating a monster. You've already created a monster. You re enforcing the behavior okay? I'm sorry to say but if you want to get somebody an emergency credit card I believe you can set it up with a limit. In other words, what the heck would she need access to that much money for without you being involved there is no way she should have been able to spend $2,000 on your credit card when it was emergency only. I mean I'm sorry. Emergency okay. The car breaks
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    her prescription medication and doesn't have insurance okay. But if it was over a couple hundred dollars wouldn't you step in and help a medical bill okay I can understand they can get expensive but seriously most of them bill you forever to get paid. Very few demand payment up front. Unless of course you're doing something very elective like. Oh I don't know Brest implants liposuction a facelift now those things they want the cash up front because otherwise they're never going to get the money.
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    I'm glad you canceled the card, but I would definitely contact your credit card companies in advance and ask them if you want to have somebody be able to carry your card for emergency purposes only. Can you set a limit on how much they can spend on it? In other words, will they take that auxiliary card and limit it to $200 or $500 rather than however much credit you have available on your own card? I mean I certainly before I hand an auxiliary card to somebody. Knowing that I am legally responsi
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    And before you say, but if you were in an emergency situation had had an accident needed medical treatment. Yeah okay. I'm betting you have health insurance and I mean hopefully they would take whatever the person's limit was as an intention to pay until you were able to cover whatever your co-pays were seriously. Even if you were arrested and had to have bail money, I think you'll find they would let you make a phone call and use your credit card to arrange the bail (don't ask me how I know but
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    I would think even if I had to open a secured credit card I would have the opportunity to limit the amount of credit they could use. Honestly, I just think you've made life too easy for her. You're not making her stand on her own two feet and I mean okay. She has to buy her own food. She pays a little towards rent and supposedly she's saving the rest of the money to get on her feed again. I'm guessing if she doesn't think twice about two grand to deal with a cat who's no longer amongst the livin
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    willing to bet if you had forced her to leave. She'd have used your credit card to pay the security deposit or get herself a long-term motel rental. You've literally made it too easy for her and she thinks that means you're willing to let this go on forever and why should she ever move out? You've made it too easy. And no seriously. I know losing an animal you love is devastating, but you don't spend that bills plus two grand on the final arrangements. I'm sorry if you haven't got it. You don't
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    You know if this had been a friend doing this I'd have told you you needed a better quality friend and you really needed to upgrade and get yourself some better friends. But you can pick your friends. You can't pick your relatives. I would however make the suggestion that any relative that tells you you're being mean to her ask them how much they're contributing towards the funeral expense. I'll bet it shuts them up real fast
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    kiwimuz NTJ. Don't give her three months, kick her out today. What your sister did is called theft. Taking something without permission. She knew it was not an emergency when she did it.

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